


Lily's the Man

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-22
Updated: 2012-01-22
Packaged: 2019-01-19 16:02:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 54,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12413388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: Lily Evans is posing as her next door neighbor, who's on tour with his band, in order to play Quidditch at Hogwarts. How far will she go to prove that you don't have to be a boy in order to succeed? Based off of She's The Man.





	1. You Can't CANCEL Quidditch!

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

**A/N: My most sincerest apologies for the formatting, I don't know why it's doing this.  
**

****

** Chapter 1: You Can't CANCEL Quidditch! **

"I AM THE QUIDDITCH _GODDESS!_ "

"Ah, shut up, Lils, you scored on _Lottie_. She barely knows how to fly."

"Hey!"

"It's  
true, Lot, you know that. The only reason you agreed to play Keeper is  
because we told you you wouldn't have to do anything."

"And you lied-" Lottie started to protest.

"Well, if you knew a _thing_ about Quidditch-"

"GUYS!" I yelled, interrupting Claire, "Can we not just bask in the glory of my goal?"

Lottie snorted and Claire rolled her eyes but both cracked smiles. I smiled in return.

My  
name is Lily Evans, Captain for the Girl's Quidditch Team at  
Beauxbatons Academy of Magic. I am a rising seventh year, which means  
it's currently the middle of August. Last week, my grandparents allowed  
me to go South to Lottie's vacation house, along with Claire and Austen  
(my boyfriend).

Sun, friends, vacation house, quickly organized Quidditch games = very happy Lily.

"Wouldn't it make more sense if you just let Austen play Keeper? That's his actual _position,_ "  
Lottie protested, putting one hand on her hip and somehow managing to  
look sassy while straddling a broomstick. That was Lottie. You wouldn't  
be able to find so much girly-ness and attitude in anyone else. But she  
usually reserved that bit of herself for people who deserved it. Namely,  
me and Claire when we teased her about her Quidditch skill. Or lack  
thereof.

"But if Austen was playing Keeper we wouldn't get _anything,_ "  
Claire retorted, "It's not good for your self-esteem." Claire had been  
my best friend since we were five, before either of us had any idea that  
we were actually witches. Growing up on the same muggle street, we  
spent a lot of time together, and we could read each other like books.  
She had been there when I was seven and my parents were killed in the  
car accident, and when we both got our letters of acceptance to  
Beauxbatons, and Madame Maxime herself explained what all this was.

Our  
first day of Beauxbatons we met Lottie, and she joined our little party  
almost immediately. She and Claire were like the opposite sides of  
Velcro, but were really thick as thieves.

"Ladies, please, I'd go  
easy on you," Austen said as he walked towards us, four matching  
envelopes in his hand, "In all honesty I don't think I'd need too. Lily  
and Claire are easily better than some of the guys on my team!"

Aww…  
so sweet. We've been dating since the middle of fifth year, and he  
still made my heart beat a little faster whenever I saw him. Claire  
called it love. Lottie called it a heart attack. Then again, she was  
always a little strange.

I, personally, was hoping Claire was right.

"We  
got our start-of-term notices, by the way," he said, handing a letter  
to each of us. I ripped my open with the enthusiasm of a puppy in a pile  
of dirt. There was a rumor that Quidditch Try-outs would be in the  
summer this year to prepare early.

_Dear Miss Evans,_

_Welcome back to another year at Beauxbatons Academy of Magic. Be sure to study hard…_

Blah  
blah blah… They've said the same thing for the past five years. I  
skimmed the rest of the letter until I saw the word 'Quidditch'.

_...Quidditch try-outs for the school teams will be held on August 21._

YES YES YES! QUIDDITCH IN THE SUMMER!

… _but the women's Quidditch Team at Beauxbatons has unfortunately been disbanded due to lack of interest…_

WHAT? NO NO NO!

… _However,  
the boy's team is still together, and will compete against Hogwarts  
School Of Witchcraft and Wizardry for a friendly match four weeks after  
the start of term on September 1st_ _._

_Your list of books needed for this year is located in this envelope._

_Sincerely,_

_Madame Maxime_

_Headmistress_

I repeat: WHAT?

I  
looked up and caught the gaze of a near-explosive Claire. I almost  
considered lighting a flame near her shirt to see if she combusted.

"WHAT - THE - _HELL_?"  
She screamed, shaking her parchment angrily to no one in particular.  
Lottie and Austen exchanged uncomfortable glances and decided to stay  
out mine and Claire's path of fury.

" _'LACK OF INTEREST'_? WE WERE JUST FINE!"

All right, so we had to bribe a fourth year to be our keeper, but we were fine, goddamnit!

"It might be for the best, Lily…" Austen said cautiously. I turned on him.

"'FOR THE BEST'? THEY CANCELED _QUIDDITCH!_ " I shrieked in his face. He took a step back, placing his hands on my shoulders to try and calm me down.

I glared.

"Look, Lily, there isn't anything you can do about it _now_. And you can still come to our games and stuff…" Austen trailed off, wondering what response that would get him.

I simply sighed, slightly defeated. Claire was still shaking in fury, but something sparked in my mind.

"When did your notice say Quidditch try-outs were again?" I asked Austen.

"Umm," he checked his letter, "August 21st, why?"

"No  
reason," I said innocently. I caught Claire's eye and she raised an  
eyebrow, but I shook my head. This would have to wait for later.

"Oy, Austen, what's Luna doing at try-outs?" A thick, muscly boy called out as soon as Claire and I came into view.

"Lily,"  
I snapped. Idiot. "For your information, Claire and I," I gestured  
first to Claire, then to myself, in case the bloke really was as slow as  
I thought, "are trying out." Claire folded her arms and gave him a  
satisfied smirk. Austen blanched, and came up to me, dropping his voice  
so only I could hear him.

"Lily? Really, what are you doing here, it's not funny." I was taken aback.

"I just told you. We're trying out," I replied in slightly-louder-than-normal tone, so everyone could hear me.

Austen  
scowled, his neck turning red out of embarrassment. Claire and I were  
getting the attention of the whole team, and a small crowd was forming  
around us.

"Wasn't the girl's team disbanded?"

"Why are there girls here?"

"Austen, what are they doing?"

"Austen?" I asked, looking up at him.

"You really shouldn't be here, Lily," he said, "you can't play with us."

I scowled and almost stamped my foot - yes, _stamped my foot_. I was mad, all right?

"Last week you said Claire and I were _better_ than a bunch of guys on your team," I said. That's right, Austen, pay for what you are doing!

His  
eyes widened and his face immediately went red when we was the object  
of the team's attention now. "I - I - I mean - no I didn't!" He finally  
spluttered out. "You're lying, Lily. You and your friend could never  
handle being on our team. It's too much. End of discussion."

I  
jerked back like I'd been slapped in the face. I stood my ground,  
though, and slapped the sorry bastard in the face. The boys realized  
their sexist ways and of course let me and Claire on the team, where we  
won every game by my amazing Chaser skills and her Seeking. Everyone in  
France called out in celebration "Hooray for Lily! Hooray for Claire!"  
And Swedish supermodels saw us and decided they wanted to marry us and  
have thousands of children -

Oh all right, that never happened.

I  
jerked back like I'd been slapped in the face. "Fine," I said quietly,  
backing up and taking Claire by the shoulder so she came with me. "End  
of relationship," I added dramatically, before turning away and  
sprinting back up the hill bordering the Beauxbaton's Quidditch Pitch.

"That _jerk_!"  
Claire shouted when we apparated back to my house. Lottie was still at  
her vacation house, so we had no one to vent to but each other until our  
recently owled-letter got to her. "I mean, he just... UGH!" She had  
lost the ability to form complete sentences, this was not good. I,  
however, was handling this well.

"I'M GOING TO CUT HIS TESTICLES OFF!"

Totally fine.

"WHAT GIVES HIM THE RIGHT TO TURN US AWAY FROM TRY OUTS LIKE THAT!" Claire asked rhetorically.

"I MEAN _COME ON-_ "

"Could  
you both please shut up so mum doesn't know I'm over here?" Came a  
voice from my open bedroom window. Jake Cole, my next door neighbor -  
equally red-headed with freckles to boot - quickly crossed the room and  
closed the curtains to my window, which had a perfect view of his  
kitchen, where his mother stood chopping up something for dinner. His  
parents divorced when his mother realized his father was a wizard, and  
during the summers between terms at Beauxbatons, he bounced between  
their houses every two weeks. What neither of his parents knew, though,  
was that in our third year he started a band with three other blokes  
(Free Fall) and played every night in Paris, in a small pub near the  
Eiffel Tower. He looked at me and thrust a large bag into my hands. "I  
need you to keep these for a while," he said. I nearly dropped the bag  
by the amount of weight suddenly thrust on me, but peered inside. There  
were about ten textbooks inside, all thick and hardback, with around  
five sets of the same uniform, the pitch black cloaks having a school  
emblem I wasn't familiar with.

"Um... Jake?" I asked cautiously,  
fearing for his sanity. Jake usually came over whenever he was staying  
with his mum, he couldn't stand her. But never before had he suddenly  
asked me to keep a bag full of thick text books, _none_ of which looked like Beauxbatons books. "Have you murdered someone?"

Jake glared at me. " _No_."

Such a quick response... I'll be sleeping with my eyes open from now on.

He sighed and gestured for us to sit down. "Mum and Dad have decided that I will be attending _Hogwarts_ for my last year of schooling."

Lucky little sh-

"And you're _upse_ t  
by this?" Claire asked, with good reason. It was common knowledge that  
Jack hated everything that had to do with his mother. Namely, France.

"No, I'm thrilled! Finally get out of _Beauxbatons_. It sounds like a _girl's_ school for Merlin's sake!" Jake rolled his eyes, "But me and my band... well, we got a spot opening for _The Weird Sisters_!" He said excitedly, immediately lighting up at the thought. Me and Claire squealed and clapped.

"Jake, that's amazing!" Claire laughed. "But wait, when? School starts in about... a week and a bit," she said vaguely.

Jake  
squirmed, looking uncomfortable. "See, that's my problem. Our slot is  
for about five weeks. I can't tell mum. So..." He looked imploringly at  
Lily, "I need you to alert the school, as my mother, that I'm grievously  
ill, and could be out for the first month. Dragon pox, spattergroit,  
cancer! I don't care, but Lily, _please_. Just a quick jaunt up to England, do a couple of charms to make yourself older, shed a tear or two and I'm good!"

"What makes you think this could work?" I said out loud. Really, I'm thinking: What the bloody hell is he _on_ , this no-good, slacking, advantage-taking -

"Have you _ever_ noticed how much alike we look?" He said, gesturing between us, "Same  
red hair, we've both got freckles, I'm bloody short so I'm your height.  
My masculine physique is really the only extremely noticeable  
difference!"

\- wonderful, amazing, intelligent boy who has just solved all of my problems!

"Wow, you're right." Claire said, looking between us.

"You  
know what, Jake? I'll do it, it's no problem," I said sweetly. His face  
showed suspicion. Jerk. I'm doing him a favor! Kind of.

"All  
right, thanks Lily!" He finally said, and hugged me. "Mum thinks I'm  
staying at Dad's, Dad thinks I'm at Mum's. Then in ten days they'll both  
think I'll be at Hogwarts. I'm off then."

"So soon?" Claire asked, alarmed. Jake rolled his eyes.

"Duh. First show is in _two days_!" He said, giving her a hug as well. "Don't forget, Lily. I owe you!" He turned on the spot and disapparated.

Claire  
stared at the gap of space where he previously stood. She then turned  
on me. "So what's your bright idea now?" She asked, one eyebrow raised. I  
smirked.

"I'm getting back at Austen."

"Ah, crap. I'm getting sucked into this, too, aren't I?"

"Lils, are you _absolutely, positively, SURE_ you want to do this?" Lottie asked, taking a lock of my hair and almost petting it out of sadness.

Merlin, woman, it was _MY_ hair.

" _Yes_ ," I said for about the hundredth time.

"Dressing up like Jake and pretending to _be him,_ a _boy_ doesn't seem like the answer to your problems," she continued as though she hadn't heard me.

"Ah,  
Lottie, stuff it. If Lily wants to do this, it's really her choice,"  
Claire said, waving her hand impatiently, but keeping her gaze between  
my face and a close-up picture of Jake that was taken last week. "Turn  
your head to the left," she told it, the picture-Jake complying  
immediately.

It was August 31st, the day before the train to  
Hogwarts left, and I confided in Lottie and Claire my plan: to pretend  
to be Jake for the few weeks he would be gone, make the Quidditch team,  
and kick Austen's ass in the game we play against them. Easy-peasey.

The only problem: I was a girl.

"I  
still don't understand why you can't at least take Polyjuice Potion or  
something," Lottie said, twirling her wand. All I had asked her was to  
cut my hair. No one was better with magic beauty and cosmetics and the  
likes than Lottie. But for some reason she seemed unwilling to chop off  
all of her best friend's elbow-length red hair in exchange for a choppy,  
eyebrow-skimming boys cut.

I sighed. Some people were difficult.

" _Because_.  
Polyjuice potion has to be taken every hour. What if something happens  
in the middle of the night and for some reason one of the boys in my  
dorm sees me? I'm definitely _not_ waking up every hour just to take some stinking potion," I snapped.

"And we don't even know how to make it," Claire also put in. Lottie bit her lip, but finally nodded. My friends set to work.

I  
wish I could say my heart didn't lurch when the first 20 inch strand  
came off, but of course it did. I couldn't see what Claire was doing to  
my face with her charms and Transfiguration, so that wasn't as painful  
an experience.

My hair littered the floor in long clumps. I stared  
at it, slightly transfixed. Lottie took a hand mirror off of my bed and  
put it in front of my face.

WOAH.

Lottie had styled my hair  
the way Jake had it, slightly long, in the front it skimmed my  
eyebrows, in the back it would touch the collar of the button down  
shirts they had at Hogwarts. The sides went a little past my ear, and it  
was perfectly straight, a strange contrast to my preferred  
beachy-waves. But it did look good. For a boy's style, that is.

Claire had charmed my face so it was slightly more angular, my nose was longer and pointier, there was a hint of _stubble_ on my cheeks, and my eyes were suddenly just a tad smaller, and worst of all, _brown._

"Did  
you have to change my eyes?" I asked, wincing slightly. I was used to  
green orbs. Now it looked like Ms. Winston's cat from across the street  
had pooped on me.

"Jake has brown eyes, Lily," Claire pointed out.

"I  
know, but..." The sound that came out of my mouth was more a  
"nnrrgghhhfff" by my disappointment but inability to argue with that  
fact.

"If it helps, if you were actually a guy I might date you," Lottie said.

"Thanks," I replied dryly.

"She  
looks too much like Jake to me," Claire decided, studying me closely,  
"Besides, I'm over rebels. I want a simple guy, one that would take me  
on a picnic for a date."

I raised my eyebrows, and almost gasped because they disappeared behind my hairline. That was weird.

"Well,  
I say Lily's extremely lucky. She gets to meet foreign boys and sleep  
in their dorm and everything..." Lottie trailed off, getting a  
day-dreamy look on her face.

For the love of Merlin.

"I'm going to be a _BOY_ while spending this oh-so-special one-on-one time with them!" I almost spat, gesturing to my face. Lottie shrugged.

"Your  
choice, remember?" Damn, she was right. "It can't be too bad. Just get  
up earlier for showers, hide your bras and knickers at the very bottom  
of your trunk, and make sure you have some secret inside pocked for  
tampons!" She added cheerfully, missing my horrified look.

Shit.

This already seemed too hard.

Think  
of Quidditch, Lily. This is why you're doing all of this. Think of  
throwing the Quaffle right into Austen's smirking face. Scoring the  
final goal before the seeker (on the Hogwarts team, of course) catches  
the Snitch, winning the game.

Whew. Better.

"All right. Got it," I said simply, playing with a strand of my hair and observing myself in the mirror again. I _did_ look strikingly similar to Jake. Having us switch after a few weeks won't be too noticeable.

"And  
remember, we're gonna cover for you back at Beauxbatons. I think you're  
coming down with dragon pox, Lily," Claire said seriously, looking me  
straight in the eye. A few seconds passed before all three of us burst  
out laughing.

"I'll miss you girls," I said, pouting. A three-girl group hug followed immediately.

"We're  
going to go with you to the train station tomorrow, though, so don't  
worry," Lottie said, smiling widely at the thought. I snorted.

"You just want to see if you spot and hot guys to make coming to visit me worth it," I replied. Lottie winked.

"We'd better get going, Lils. See you tomorrow. Ten o'clock?" Claire asked.

I  
nodded and shooed them out the door and ran back up to my room, where I  
finished packing my large trunk with the uniforms, a few of Jake's  
clothes that I stole from his closet that I knew would fit me, the  
textbooks along with other supplies, and finally, my broomstick. After  
sitting on the suitcase in order to zipper it shut, I fell backwards  
onto my bed with a soft _thump!_ and fell asleep almost as soon as I hit the pillow.

**A/N:**  
So, what'd you think? Love? Hate? Want to personally get me a room at  
the closest mental institute? READ AND REVIEW! Not reviewing is against  
the law. No, really. :D 


	2. Do These X Chromosomes Make Me Look Fat?

** Chapter 2: Do These X Chromosomes Make Me Look Fat? **

"This is it, right? King's Cross Station?" Lottie asked, squinting up into the sun in order to read the sign on the grand train station. I scrutinized the start-of-term letter Jake left in the bag, and confirmed her statement.

It was time. The giant clock inside the building showed it was 10:43, seventeen minutes until I officially became Jake Cole for the next four weeks. Kinda scary. The charms Claire used on my face faded after about twelve hours, so every morning I'd have to redo them, but they definitely weren't the worst of my problems.

We walked through the crowded entryway and towards the platforms, searching for 9 3/4.

Wait just-a-bloody second.

I took the ticket back out of my pocket and eyed it suspiciously. Since when were there... mixed-number platforms?

"It's 9 3/4, right?" Claire asked, looking between platforms nine and ten as if waiting for the right platform to appear.

"Yeah, that's what it says on the ticket..." I trailed off, getting nervous. How am I supposed to get onto the train if I can't even figure out how to get to the bloody thing?

"Don't panic, let's just look around for people our age, they might be going to Hogw-," Claire said.

"Hold on, did you see that?" Lottie suddenly pointed to the barrier again.

"Er... see what?" I asked, following her gaze. Yep, there was a barrier there. Very solid looking. Good job, Lottie?

"I... I think I just saw someone walk through it," Lottie said hesitantly.

"What?" Claire asked, alarmed.

"I'm serious! Look, watch those kids!" Lottie pointed to a couple of kids around the age of thirteen or fourteen. They leaned casually against the barrier, and looked around to see if anyone was watching. Not noticing us, they both turned, dragging their luggage and walked straight through the wall.

"What the hell was that?" Claire exclaimed.

"That was the way to Platform 9 3/4!" I said excitedly, "I'm sure of it!"

The three of us walked quickly over to where the kids just were and looked around to see if anyone was watching us. I cautiously stepped forward and put a hand on the bricks, and gasped when it fell through like nothing was there. I pulled my hand back quickly and examined it for signs of damage. Woah.

"I think this is it," I said, turning back to them. Claire raised her eyebrows suspiciously, but Lottie marched forward confidently, linking her arms through both mine and Claire's, humming a tune that sounded suspiciously like 'Follow the Yellow Brick Road'. She picked up speed and dragged us into a run. As we neared the brick, I squeezed shut my eyes, still not believing I would get through this experience unscathed-

"Lily, Merlin, you can stop running!" Lottie said impatiently, stopping in her tracks, resulting in me jerking forward. I snapped open my eyes and saw that we had indeed lived through the wall experience. Lottie unlinked her arm from mine and looked around, mouthing "wow".

Platform 9 3/4 was much bigger than the other platforms in King's Cross. The huge train sitting on the tracks was a cherry red, spewing scarlet smoke into the air. All around young students and parents were milling about, saying their good-byes and hoisting luggage onto the train.

"This seems better than just flooing to school," Claire commented. I couldn't agree more. I stood up straight, adjusted the collar of Jake's shirt, and grinned confidently. I made eye contact with a guy, tall, with dark hair that fell into his eyes in a sort of casual elegance making his way over to a small group of other boys. The bloke nodded in greeting to me, and flicked his gaze between Lottie and Claire before grinning cheekily at me.

OH MY MERLIN HE KNEW!

_"He knows!"_ I hissed, pulling Lottie and Claire with me behind a column, _"Take me back right this instant-"_

_"He does not-"_

_"-I shouldn't have done this-"_

_"-you're overreacting-"_

_"-it was stupid-"_

_"-we're not wasting all of our hard work-"_

_"-never let me do anything this stupid again-"_

_"-that's not fair, Lil, not fair at all!"_

_"-I can't believe I actually came-"  
_

_"-just pluck up some courage and get back out there!"_

_"Fine!"_

I huffed. Damn them.

"All right. Show us the walk again," Claire instructed, turning to me.

I walked a few paces, slouching, and moving my shoulders more than was necessary.

"Good," Claire nodded, "Voice?"

"Yo," I said, deepening my voice, half closing my eyes, smirking, and giving them a half nod, "I'm Jake, what's up?"

"You sound like a tool."

"So that means I got it down perfectly, doesn't it?"

"Lily," Lottie said exasperatedly.

"Fine, fine," I said, but cleared my voice and repeated in a deeper tone, "Fine." I'd have to get used to that.

"Man-hug?" Lottie asked, putting her hand out a little higher than people would to get a handshake. I grasped it and pulled us together, patting her on the back once firmly, before letting go and stepping back. "Good." She said. She could've done without the giggling.

"Well..." Claire said, checking her watch, "I think that's all we can do Lil- Jake," she said, frowning at the name.

I nodded sadly. Why was I doing this to myself again?

"Just make sure to kick Austen's ass at the game," Lottie winked.

Oh, right.

That was why.

I grinned wickedly. "Of course I will!"

They laughed, and we hugged one more time before I stepped away and towards the train, hoisting my trunk onto it before I jumped up myself. I began to blow a kiss, but coughed awkwardly and looked around, then raised a fist eye level instead. Claire rolled her eyes, but Lottie cried out, "Be a good _boy_ now!"

Great, Lottie, _that_ wasn't obvious.

Finally, I walked into the train corridor, catching glimpses of them every time I passed a window.

I found an empty compartment towards the end of the train and set my luggage on the wire racks above the crimson velvet seats. I leaned into the window, just catching sight of Claire and Lottie before they both turned and disapparated, making their way back to France before anyone missed them.

I sighed, suddenly feeling very lonely.

There was a knock on the sliding door of the compartment.

Well, it seems loneliness doesn't last very long.

I opened the door and revealed a girl, around my height, with wavy blonde hair and the type of big brown eyes you usually see on puppies.

"Hi!" she said cheerfully, "I don't mean to be rude, but there are no other empty compartments..."

"Oh, sure," I said, remembering to deepen my voice. It's not pathetic that I'm proud of that, is it? Don't answer that. "I'm Jake."

"Bridget," Bridget smiled and extended her hand. I shook it, and noticed the paint on her nails.

"Is that the new color-change polish Witch Weekly had an article about last week?" I gasped out in excitement.

"Yeah, it is!" Bridget said, brightening up.

"Wow, how'd you get it? It wasn't supposed to come out until October!"

"Oh, my Aunt wrote the article! The makers of the color gave her a complimentary bottle and she gave it to me as an early birthday present."

"That's so cool -" I blanched, realizing how I sounded, "- cause, you know, my neighbor... she liked the nail polish. Wouldn't shut up about it, really," I laughed awkwardly.

I was _fantastic_ at this.

Bridget just smiled and nodded though, as if all males squealed about nail polish. I realized I was blocking her way and shuffled aside.

"So, I haven't seen you around before. What house are you in?" Bridget asked after she put her trunk next to mine.

"Er... house?" I asked. You get your own houses at Hogwarts? This place must be _huge_!

"Ooh, you're a new student? I didn't know Hogwarts admitted transfers!" Bridget said excitedly, "There are four houses you get sorted in: Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Slytherin and Hufflepuff."

"Those are odd names," I said. So they were like the groups you get put into at Beauxbatons. Only there we were just split up alphabetically, "How do you choose your house?"

"You put on a hat and it tells you," Bridget said, like she was discussing the weather.

"A hat?"

"Yeah, it judges your personality. You know, positive traits, negative traits, fears, stuff like that. Then it decides which house is best suited for you."

"So... what do each house mean?"

"Well, Gryffindor is said to be the brave ones, Hufflepuff are the hardworking, loyal ones, Ravenclaw is for the smart students, and Slytherin is for the cunning, sneaky ones. Everyone knows Slytherin is a rotten house, a lot of the students in it are real jerks," she added, leaning in closer. "Most of the older blokes are said to be joining _You-Know-Who_ when they get out of Hogwarts."

A hat that judges your personality. What next, the Scarf of Sexual Preference?

"So what house are you in?" I asked.

"Gryffindor," she said somewhat proudly. I guess Gryffindor wasn't a You-Know-Who supporting house.

"Cool," I said, not really having much else. What house would I be in? What if this hat thing couldn't decide and I ended up waiting forever? "When do you get sorted?"

"The first years do it before the Welcoming Feast, while we're all watching."

Oh bollocks.

"I have to get sorted in front of everyone with all the little shrimps?"

"Well... maybe not? I don't know, I've never heard of a transfer student before."

"Fantastic," I said, putting my head in my hand. The first day and I'm already going to get made a fool of.

Bridget reached over and took my hand, "I'm sure Dumbledore won't make you do that. Before the first years go out he has Professor McGonagall meet with you before hand or something."

I wasn't really convinced. I already imagined myself, two feet taller than all of the eleven-year-olds.

Before I could say anything, however, the door slid open to reveal a young man. He was about three inches taller than I was (which, admittedly, wasn't very tall) with very dark and rather long hair that looked as if it could use a washing. His hooked nose was crinkled as if he smelled something unpleasant and his small dark eyes showed distaste as they looked me up and down. He turned his gaze to Bridget though, and I couldn't help but notice that he brightened up.

"Oh, Bridget! There you are! I have a compartment with some of the guys down the train, care to join me?" He stepped in front of me, blocking me from view.

"No, thank you, Severus," Bridget said, sounding polite but I could tell there was a long list of things she would rather do instead of sit with... Severus. Weird name.

"Oh. All right," he said, turning away from us and towards the door, leaving without another word, completely ignoring my existence.

Well that was rude.

"Who was he, exactly?" I asked, craning my neck to see the last of him disappear down the hall through the glass.

"Severus Snape," she said, a hint of dislike in her voice, "he's in Slytherin. Last year we ended up being Potions partners, and he helped me pull my grade up. So I was nicer to him than the Mar- a lot of the guys in our year, and now he won't leave me alone."

"Could use some shampoo," I said offhandedly, wondering what she was saying when she said "The Mar".

Bridget giggled at my comment, "I have a feeling you'll fit in with the guys here."

"What makes you say that?" I asked, slightly alarmed.

Did I naturally have a... manly aura?

"They just... tease him a lot. Especially about his hair. But nobody really likes him except for the other Slytherins."

"Does Slytherin get along with anyone?"

"Well... no," Bridget admitted, "But at least that means _you_ won't be in Slytherin."

"Yeah, I suppose."

Wait.

Did she just compliment me?

Holy Merlin is she _flirting_?

"Uhhh, when do we arrive? You know it's getting pretty dark! Do you see that star? Aren't you supposed to make a wish off the first star you see? Do we have to change into our robes before getting there? Actually, I have to use the loo. Be right back!"

I fumbled for a moment in my trunk and grabbed my uniform, then sprinted out of the room, towards the bathroom at the end of the train.

Thankfully, it wasn't occupied. I locked the door and leaned against it, panting slightly.

If this girl 'casually' brings up that she doesn't have a boyfriend I am O-U-T _OUT_.

Still slightly red-faced, I changed into the boy's uniform and refreshed the charms on my face. I used a strip of tan cloth to flatten my chest, seamlessly sealing the end with magic so it was also easy to undo.

I sighed and folded Jake's clothes into a neat pile before leaving the bathroom and making my way back to the compartment, where Bridget was waiting.

For the rest of the train ride, I told her I needed to look through my textbooks to try and catch up with the curriculum ("Need some help?" "Uh, no, that's all right...").

Finally, after a few more hours the train came to a jerking halt, and the corridor filled with students trying to push past each other to the exit. I raised my eyebrows at Bridget and she nudged me forward, into the crowd. Immediately I was jostled and pushed, elbowed and stepped on. After a few minutes of struggling, the crowd thinned as we got closer to the nearest exit and I realized I had lost sight of Bridget.

Stepping off the train, I saw a large sign saying _Hogsmeade Station_. There was a long line of horseless carriages, which were quickly filling with students and then pulling themselves up the path, no doubt to the Castle, which was hidden by the trees.

"Come on, silly, we need to get a carriage before they're all taken!"

Bridget had somehow snuck up on me and linked her arm through mine, eerily similar to the way Lottie had that very morning when we went through the barrier together with Claire.

"Oh, uh... all right," I said. I let her usher me towards the nearest empty carriage and it was another few minutes until it started following the long trail. I have to admit, it was very peaceful. The carriage was traveling smoothly over the dirt trail, and the trees on the edge of the trail were still green-leafed from summer. The ride passed in silence until the castle came into view at the end of the path.

"Wow," I said quietly. 'Castle' definitely covered it. Every window was illuminated with light. Tall towers rose from the building, and what looked like three courtyards were visible just from the front.

"That's Gryffindor Tower," Bridget said, pointing to one of the tall pillars, but she blushed, "Although, I probably shouldn't have told you that."

"It's all right, secret's safe with me," I said, still trying to swallow every inch of the castle with my eyes. The carriage stopped and we jumped out, making our way into the building. A hop, skip, and a less-than-one-minute-walk later and we were standing in the doorway of a large room, with four very long tables running the length of the room, and a smaller table at the head, perpendicular to the rest. Banners of red, green, blue, and gold circled the hall with a final banner behind the head table. It had a large 'H' on it, and circled around it was a lion, a snake, an eagle, and a badger.

"Well, this is the Great Hall. It's where we eat every meal," Bridget said, "That's Gryffindor table, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin," she pointed to each table as she said which house sat there.

"So... where do I sit?" I asked, looking for the 'transfer student' table. I didn't think it would appear.

"Um..." she said, frowning as she looked around the hall.

However, a tall, thin woman approached us and said to me, "Jake Cole?"

"Er... yes?" I said, unconsciously deepening my voice more so than I already was.

"Come with me," the woman said sternly.

My eyes widened slightly and I exchanged a glance with Bridget, but she smiled and walked towards the Gryffindor Table.

I followed the woman out of the Great Hall, around some corners, down some hallways, and to a room that was obviously the woman's office.

"Unfortunately, we have to get the First Years sorted first," she said without preamble. Ohh, that's what this was. I was getting sorted! "So if you would please wait here until they are finished, and then I will join you again and sort you into a house. It seemed less... noticeable than you being sorted with the First Years."

"Thank you," I said, happy not to have to stand with the midgets in front of the whole school.

"My name is Proffesor McGonagall," she said as she was walking out the door. She turned around briefly, "Welcome to Hogwarts." With that, she closed the door and left me alone in the room.

By the watch on my wrist, it took about forty-five minutes for the First Years to get sorted. Proffesor McGonagall returned with an old, tattered hat in her hands. She wordlessly handed it to me, and I stared at it for a few seconds before placing it on my head.

_Hmm... interesting..._

WHY WAS THERE A VOICE IN MY HEAD?

_Having some self-image issues, eh,_ Miss _Evans?_

Oh, that. Well, you know...

_I just sort into houses, I won't tell anyone. My brim is sealed._

Did a hat just make a pun?

_Let's have a look at you now..._

Keep your eyes up, mister. Oh wait, I'm a boy.

_Very intelligent... but also kind and loyal... Hufflepuff seems a good fit._

Eurgh. Please no, I look horrible in yellow.

_But also very brave... you value friendship above all else..._

Yes... positive traits. I love this hat, he only tells you nice things.

_But of course, you are lying to everyone..._

Stupid hat. Just sort me already!

_I've made my decision._

Finally!

"GRYFFINDOR!" The hat called grandly. Why did he have to shout?

"Very good," Professor McGonagall nodded and wrote something on a bit of parchment, "I'll show you back to the Great Hall."

"Actually... could I just go to the Dormitories?" I asked. I didn't feel like eating very much, and it would give me enough time to shower and change in privacy and... non-awkwardness.

Professor McGonagall nodded, "Very well, follow me."

I followed McGonagall out the door, and zoned out slightly as she led the way up many flights of stairs. I vaguely remembered Bridget saying something about Gryffindor being in a tower. My calves felt it.

Although, I was filled with a happy kind of warmth. I had a house! I belonged! Yay! I was a Gryffindor person! I was a Gryffindorian!

Hogwarts already felt a little more like home.

That is, until I got into the dormitory.


	3. Meeting the Marauders

** Chapter 3: Meeting the Marauders   
**

After my sorting, I followed McGonagall up the many flights of stairs to Gryffindor Tower. She explained to me about how the Common Room was password protected, and to gain access you spoke the password to the Fat Lady in the portrait that acted as a door, then she would swing open to reveal the Common Room to you **.** Rather odd, that.

When I stepped into the room, the first thing I felt was... warmth. Not the fuzzy "I'm HOME!" type, but the type where you're surrounded by fire. Or many, many red and gold decorations.

All around me was a deep shade of crimson: the walls, the carpet, the leather on the plush-looking sofas. Bits of gold were hidden in there too: the lining on the windows, the fire, the large bulletin board off to one side. All right, it wasn't that bad. I could already imagine snuggling up on a couch during winter, reading a book in front of the fire with snowflakes lightly hitting the windows.

Oh wait.

I won't be here for winter. Why did I think of that?

Whatever.

"The boy's dormitories are up to the left, the girl's on the right. I trust you know which is the one you should go up, and which one you shouldn't." McGonagall fixed me with a hard stare. I stifled a laugh. Yes, yes, I _know_ that I should _always_ go up to the boy's bedrooms instead of the girls and sleep with them!

I shouldn't say that out loud. Might get a few confused stares, don't you think?

After she left to go back to the Welcome Feast, I went upstairs to the door marked "Seventh Years". Suddenly, I was nervous. Would this work out? How was I supposed to hide that I was a fully-blown-boobs-and-everything _girl?_ Didn't guys have a radar for that or something?

Mustering up whatever 'Gryffindor Courage' I had, I opened the door and tentatively walked in the room. It was more or less the same decoration style as the Common Room. There were five four-poster beds with crimson curtains surrounding them spread out on the edges of the room. There was a nightstand and dresser for each bed, and two doors at the end of the room which I could only guess were a closet and the bathroom. Suddenly I was glad I was alone for the time being. I could get my bearings a bit.

All of the luggage from the train was indeed brought up, and a trunk was situated next to each bed. I checked the tag on one of the trunks, and it read: _Sirius Orion Black_ with what looked like a muddy dog print underneath the name. What kind of name was 'Sirius'?

After finding my trunk next to the bed closest to the bathroom, I took the clothes and neatly refolded them, putting them in the drawers, and hung my robes in the closet. Everything all neat and tidy.

Might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

At that point I'd been alone for about a half hour. How long did the feast normally take? Should I go down there? How the hell was I supposed to find my way? Wouldn't McGonagall be angry, seeing me there after I made her walk me all the way up to the Common Room? HOLY GOD, DID I HEAR THE DOOR OPEN?

I did.

I was in the bathroom, refreshing the charms on my face for good measure, and the unmistakable sound of boyish laughter reached my ears through the closed door.

Breathe, Lily, breathe! In and out, in and out! THEY'RE JUST BOYS FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!

"Oi! Prongs! We have a new roommate this year!"

"What? Hogwarts never gets transfers!"

"Oh, Moony, there's a first for everything!"

"Where is he?"

"Did you see anyone new at the feast?"

"Other than the first year midgets? Nah, everyone looked familiar. But Bridget, did you see her hair? It was all shiny, and it grew over the summer..."

"James, close your mouth, you might start drooling."

"Shut up, Sirius!"

"Hey! He's already been here, look! His trunk and everything is already unpacked!"

At that moment, I stepped out of the bathroom, after triple checking that my sideburns were still there. A million things were rushing through me head. Mostly, what the hell kind of names were Prongs, Moony, and Wormtail?

When I saw the four boys, though, all those thoughts were wiped from my head, and only one occupied my brain at that moment:

They didn't make 'em like _that_ in France!

All right, maybe I was exaggerating.

But they were fairly good looking, and I was surrounded by them... in their room. With many beds to choose from.

_UGH, BAD LILY, NO THOUGHTS LIKE THAT, YOU ARE A_ BOY!

The first, nearest to me, wasn't as good looking as the others. He was rather short, actually, and was only maybe two inches taller than me. He had water blue eyes and brown hair, with just enough chub for it to be noticeable. He, apparently, had been the one to notice my trunk.

The second, sitting on what I assumed to be his bed, was taller, with sandy brown hair in a similar style to mine. He had a kind smile, but tired eyes, and a scar on his lower right cheek.

The third was the bloke I'd seen on the platform, with long black hair that fell elegantly into his stormy gray eyes. He had shed his cloak onto his bed and was tugging off his tie, his shirt already untucked and the first few buttons were unbuttoned.

The fourth, who looked maybe half an inch shorter than Mr. Stormy Eyes, had the same color hair, only it stuck up in odd places as though he'd accidentally stuck his hand into an electrical socket. He had light brown (possibly hazel?) eyes that were covered by his round glasses.

And I just stood there.

Staring.

At all of them.

While they gave me weird looks in return.

The electrocuted one spoke up first.

"Er... The third year dorms are down the stairs a couple of flights."

What?

"Excuse me?" I asked confusedly, remembering at the last second to deepen my voice, and stopped myself from putting one hand on my hip.

"How _old_ are you?" Mr. Stormy Eyes asked, not unkindly, but more like a child seeing an elephant for the first time.

Not the most flattering, but I'll take it.

"I'm seventeen," I said defensively, "Isn't this the seventh year dorms?"

"Well... yes. Our apologies, we just aren't used to having another roommate," the scarred one said, standing up and putting out his hand for a shake, "I'm Remus Lupin, it's nice to meet you."

"Jake Cole,"I said, looking at his hand for a millisecond, then gripping it with my own and bringing him closer for a half hug that Lottie had showed me. Remus let out an " _oof!_ " as though not expecting it, and stepped back a little quickly, clearing his throat. The two black-haired boys exchanged amused glances.

"Hello Jake," Remus regained composure, then pointed to each boy in turn, "That's Peter Pettigrew, Sirius Black, and James Potter."

"It's nice to meet you all," I said somewhat awkwardly. Don't guys do that hug thing? I was going to _kill_ Lottie!

"Yeah... so, you know us, if you, you know, need help getting to your classes or something, just ask us. Or Remus. He's a prefect, he'll be more than glad to help you out!" Sirius said, sending a wicked look to Remus, who rolled his eyes.

"We'll all help you, don't worry-"

"Oi! Is that a broomstick? Cole, do you play Quidditch?" James suddenly burst out, pointing to the half-hidden broomstick sticking out from my bed.

"Er, yeah, I do. Do you guys?" I asked, suddenly relieved to be on the topic of Quidditch. I understood _this_! No awkward hugs in Quidditch!

Sirius scoffed. " _Play?_ James is obsessed! He's been the captain since fifth year!" He thumped him on the back, and James caught his glasses before they slid off his face and almost landed on the floor, "Anyways, Cole, what position are you? I'm a beater!" He said proudly, thrusting his chest out.

Do _not_ look at his slightly revealed chest, Lily!

"Chaser, what about you, James?" I asked politely.

"Same. That's cool, Caradoc graduated last year, we have an open chaser spot."

I nodded, trying not to show how excited I was. One step closer!

"Do you guys play?" I asked Remus and Peter. Peter simply shook his head and carried on unpacking his stuff.

"No, I'm the announcer," Remus said.

"Yeah, for all the games except ours!" James complained, taking off his robes and throwing them on his bed.

"Why?" I asked curiously.

Remus smiled modestly, "I may have made a few.. ah... _biased_ comments during the Beauxbatons game in fourth year."

For some reason Sirius and James burst out laughing. After a solid minute, Sirius choked out, " _'COME ON CONNORS, KICK THE FRENCH WANKER'S ASS, YOU'VE ALMOST GOTTEN THE SNITCH! YES! HOGWARTS WINS! JOHN CONNORS CATCHES THE SNITCH! SUCK ON THAT, BEAUXBATONS!"_

This time, Peter and Remus also joined in on the laughter. I, however, stayed where I was, more confused.

"I thought the Beauxbaton's game was a friendly match?"

That got me a couple of strange stares.

"Well - I mean -" I stuttered, "I used to go there! And we never made a big deal about it."

More confused stares.

"Are you blind? In fourth year we traveled to France for the game, and there was a considerable amount of... school spirit shall we say from the blokes. The _girls_ didn't make a big deal out of it," Sirius said, giving me a weird look.

I blanched. Of _course._ Since Hogwarts didn't have a girl's team, we never played against them, so the girl's never made a big deal out of the games, mostly out of the unfairness that Hogwart's didn't have a girl's team.

"Oh, yeah, I was just thinking of my friend... she never got excited, I guess it just rubbed off on me!" I said, giving an awkward laugh.

"Wait, so did _you_ play against us then?" James asked.

"Uh... no. I wasn't on the team until fifth year," I lied quickly, "The week of tryouts I ate some bad fish for a dare, I was in the infirmary, so I missed it that year."

The boys, thankfully nodded in understanding.

"Are you trying out for the Hogwarts team?" Peter piped up.

"Definitely. I want to beat Beauxbatons," More confused stares. Dammit, Lily, stop contradicting yourself! "I mean, cause, the team's a bunch of tools!" I amended quickly. They seemed to like the insult, so I went on, "Like.. my neighbor, she used to date that jerk Austen Maynard." I gave a roll of my eyes too. For some reason, James immediately laughed.

"I know him! I made him cry last time!" He and Sirius high fived.

I paled. "That was _you_?" Me and Austen hadn't been dating yet, but I stayed up on the Quidditch Pitch with him while he venomously cursed Hogwarts and all who went there since one of the Chaser's had broken his nose. Then I thought it was all romantic, he being all sensitive to losing. Now I thought it was pathetic.

"Absolutely! That guy's is such an asshole. I can't believe he actually got a girlfriend!" James scoffed.

I laughed nervously. "Yeah."

"So, is your neighbor hot?" Sirius asked casually, tugging off his shirt.

I stuttered for a second, until he pulled on a plain with t-shirt. "Uh- um, well, I don't know, we're pretty close." I managed to choke out.

Sirius sent me a weird look and retreated to behind his bed before changing out of the school trousers and a pair of pajama pants.

I looked around the room desperately for something else to talk about, but Remus was reading, and Peter was flipping through a comic book. James was fidgeting with an old-looking snitch, rubbing the ridges near the wings, staring off into space with a thoughtful expression on his face.

I rummaged through my clothes for a minute before taking out sleeping clothes, and going into the bathroom to change into them.

"So, uh, when are try-outs?" I asked James when I came back out.

"Tomorrow morning, bright and early, right after breakfast!" He said mock-cheerfully.

"Mate, why?" Sirius complained.

"We won the Quidditch Cup last year, that means we represent Hogwarts against Beauxbatons. I'll be damned if we lose in our last year, especially if I'm captain. So we're preparing early." James said determinedly.

"Whatever you say. Hey, Cole, can I see what type of broom you have?" Sirius asked me casually.

Gladly (for I was rather proud of my broom - a Comet 240, the latest model), I pulled it out from underneath my bed, but to my mortification, the box of tampons I had stashed under there as well came sliding out too.

"Woah, why is there a box of - of tampons under your bed?" James asked.

"Uhh..." Think, Lily, dammit, think! "I uh... get really bad nosebleeds?" It came out like a question.

"So you stick them up your _nose_?" Sirius asked appallingly, crinkling his own nose, and attracting the attention of Remus and Peter as well. They were watching me with confusion.

I scoffed, "uh, _yeah!_ Ludo Bagman does it all the time. Look, you just-" I tore open the box and took one out, ripping the wrapper off of it and tossing it casually into the air (James jerked a little when it came close to him - immature prat). "You just, take off all of this... stuff, and you know - stick it right in." Demonstrating, I gingerly slid it up my left nostril. "Absorbs all the blood right up!"

The four boys started laughing hysterically.

"You look so _stupid!_ " Sirius gasped through his laughter.

"Merlin, take that out, it's disgusting," James added.

"That's - uh - a very interesting remedy, Jake," Remus said, hiding a smile.

"Let's get to bed guys, come on. Sirius, if you fall asleep during try-outs tomorrow I'm kicking you off, I mean it."

Remus flicked his wand and the lights went out, and there was much shuffling around as each of us got into bed.

I stared at the ceiling for an hour, blocking out four sets of snores, thinking of how tomorrow would go, my face still a little red from the slip up.

Was I _really_ cut out for this?


	4. Be A Man!

** Chapter 4: Be a Man!   
**

James Potter is a horrible person.

No, really.

I'm not kidding.

He's that kind of boy who splashes water on your face in order to wake you up in the mornings.

Like right now.

"JAMES POTTER!"

"Yeh?"

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR?"

"Relax! It's just water!"

"BUT _WHY?_ Now it'll take my hair _ages_ to dry-"

He was giving me a weird look.

Shit.

"I mean... I was doing an impression of my neighbor. Hah-hah. She hates it. I forgot she wasn't here."

"Man, you talk about your neighbor a lot," Sirius observed from the other side of the room, "Do you fancy her or something?"

Yes, yes I am. I am so bloody in love with myself I'm going to run away into the Norwegian mountains and elope.

"No, definitely not! Lily's... like a sister," I say, not sure exactly _what_ to say.

"Oooh, _Lily_ is it?" Sirius cooed, chucking clothes out of his trunk that he didn't unpack the night before, "Do you have a cute little pet name like _Lilyflower_ or something for her?"

"No!" I exclaimed, twisting my face into a look of disgust.

OH MY GOD, MY FACE! THE CHARMS! SHIT!

I said something really intellectual, like "UUHHHHH, I-HAVE-TO-PEE-" And I ran into the bathroom, slamming the door shut and locking it, panting slightly out of nerves. I looked in the mirror, seeing my regular face, without the sideburns, slight stubble, and most noticeable, my eyes were their regular bright green. I set to work; changing my eyes, making my nose longer, the whole nine yards. I started to undress, first stripping off the sleeping pants and hoisting up Jake's school trousers. Of course they were too big. I tightened the belt, the whole thing giving my thighs an odd diamond shape. Oh well. I took off my shirt, first inspecting myself from the side to make sure the chest-flattening bra I was wearing was still working.

Just as I was putting on the white button-up Hogwart's shirt, a very _naked_ boy stepped out of the shower.

"SHIT, PETER, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" I screamed (very high pitched, mind you), backing away, my hands in front of my face.

"WHAT AM _I_ DOING HERE? WHAT ARE _YOU_ DOING HERE? HOW DID YOU NOT NOTICE THE SHOWER WAS BEING USED?" He stumbled backwards, using the shower curtain as a cover-up.

"I DON'T KNOW, I WASN'T PAYING ATTENTION!" I spluttered, blindly making my way towards the bathroom door, swinging it open and sprinting out with my robe in my hand. I tripped on my broomstick, which was sticking out of the bottom of my bed, and just grabbed it so I wouldn't have to come back for it later. I ran out of the room. Just as I was passing a hysterical Sirius to get to the door, I hear Peter yell "WELL DON'T JUST LEAVE THE DOOR WIDE OPEN!"

* * *

"Hi Ja - what's wrong?" I heard someone say.

I was currently stumbling my way down the stairs, trying to mentally scrub the image of Peter's body out of my head. I looked up and saw Bridget at the foot of the Girl's stairs, giving me an odd look.

"Oh - uh - nothing. Just... hungry." I say stupidly.

"Oh. Do you want to walk with me to the Great Hall?" She said kindly.

Right now, my choices were:

_a._ Walk with Bridget, who was nice and willing to show me the way.

_b._ Decline, try and find my own way there, most likely get lost and starve. Not to mention I'd miss Quidditch try outs.

_c._ Wait for the four boys, and most likely get bombarded with awkward silence as I have now been probably labeled a gay peeping tom.

"Sure, thanks," I say to her, giving her a smile.

She led the way down to the Great Hall. We made our way down bipolar staircases, three trick steps, and I was completely lost, so uncertain of where we were or how we got there I was surprised when I smelled the wonderful scent of breakfast on a Sunday morning.

We sat towards the middle of the table, I set my broom on the floor beside me. A few girls around were us (Bridget's friends, I presume), all sending me glances, one daring soul gave me a wink and a flirtatious finger-waggle.

Dear God, I hope I didn't look like that when I greeted Austen that way last year.

I filled up on a healthy breakfast of eggs, sausage and toast.

I've decided it's fantastic to be a boy while eating: I don't care about my weight, the clothes cover any sort of protruding belly, I can stuff my face as rudely as I want because looking up and down the table _every other boy is doing the same_. It's bloody amazing!

Once breakfast with the giggle-infested-group-of-girls was finished, I picked up my broom and made my why out the Hall with the rest of the hopeful students planning on making the team. Hah! They didn't know Lily Ev- er... Jake Cole was coming this year!

"All right, split into groups. We'll start easy: three laps around the pitch as a warm up," James decided, wearing his captain robes. The rest of us were either in our school uniform or some sort of t-shirt-and-exercise-pants-combination. Only Sirius was brave (cocky) enough to wear his Quidditch Uniform, something James punched him in the arm for. Apparently James had a "Just because you were on the team last year doesn't mean you'll make it again" policy, but Sirius obviously ignored this.

As we circled the pitch, I fell into autopilot. The pace was easy, only the first and second years who didn't really know how to fly were lagging behind. James led the way, Sirius close behind, and two boys who had obviously been part of the team before right after them. I looked around at my competition. A few looked tough and muscly, definitely hopeful for a beater position. There was one or two really small-framed blokes who I suppose would make decent seekers. Everyone else was sort of 'blah'.

Hah! I had this in the bag.

* * *

Bloody hell.

I forgot about the whole "boys are naturally stronger than girls" thing.

Let me tell you, boys throw _hard_!

All throughout the stupid practice everyone seemed to have made it their sole mission to knock me off my broom!

First James throws me the Quaffle, I barely catch it and even though I do I still pull it into me in order to absorb the shock. Into my face, that is. I am now the wearer of an angry red mark on my forehead, thank you Mr. Potter.

About halfway one of the burlier guys hits a bludger at me that gets me right in the boob, dear god, I wanted to punch him in the face.

But I'm a boy, I apparently have a muscular chest.

Hah! If only Claire could see me now.

"Pick it up, Cole!" James calls from the air a few dozen meters away. We were currently scrimmaging, the last few who hadn't been sent off. I could feel that I was next. My arms were sore, I've never had to throw the Quaffle as hard as I was. At Beauxbatons our strategy was more of a weave-pass-off-and-fake-the-other-team-out thing. We went for speed and accuracy.

James goes for strength and the ability to make passes across the entire field.

Just as I sluggishly dodged a bludger hit from Sirius (Yes, thank you, I really appreciated that). James blew his whistle.

"All right, lads. I'm pretty sure I've made my decision. Now, there are ten positions on this team. Six to fill the starters, and one reserve for each position. Beaters, seekers, you can go sit out, get some water, whatever. Chasers, Simmons, set up at the far goal for penalty shots." He jerked his thumb over his shoulder.

At last! It was almost over! Sirius, the other beaters, and seekers flew down to the ground and circled the water cooler, splashing each other and having a right good time.

I was about to face my potential doom.

"All right, all right, line up now. All of you," he gestured to us, "will get five shots with Simmons." I did a quick head count. There were four chasers left. Michael Turner, the other chaser from the team last year, was listening with a look of cool confidence on his face.

We lined up, I was last while Michael was first (of course).

I watched as Michael put away all five goals against the team's returning Keeper, Jack Simmons (a wiry little fourth year named Zeke was our reserve). The bloke behind him got four, and I chewed on my thumbnail nervously. Jack picked it up by the third guy, though, and he only got two goals in. It was my turn.

James summoned the Quaffle from where it had landed on the ground fifty feet below and handed it to me with a look of indifference. All of the beaters and seekers were watching.

Deep breaths, Lily, deep breaths.

Taking the Quaffle firmly in my hands, I sped towards the middle hoop, making eye contact with Jack for a second, before changing directions quickly, and aiming for the right hoop. I shot the Quaffle, and it soared through the air. Jack, however, came out of no where and caught it right as it was about to go in.

I worked harder on the next four shots, and I managed to make three of them. The last one was admittedly very lucky: Jack had it, but the ball went _right_ through his fingers. Another second and he would have had it.

James nodded and marked something down on the parchment he held in his hand.

"Okay, guys, get some water. I'll think about it for a second and get back to you on the official standings."

We all flew down, attacking the water cooler. The first few sips of the ice-cold liquid almost brought tears to my eyes.

We mulled around for the next few minutes while James was in the changing room. Sirius and Jack got into a broomstick-sword-fight, and a couple of the younger players were watching excitedly. I walked over and watched in amusement too until we heard James clear his throat behind us. Immediately we all crowded around him.

"Now. I just wanted to let everyone know that if you make it as a reserve rather than a starter, you're still every bit as important. You'll just... not play as much in the games," He finished a tad awkwardly. He cleared his throat again and read aloud from the parchment in his hand.

"Beaters: Sirius Black," Sirius let out a whoop and high fived the guy next to him, then went to stand beside James, "and Ryan Campbell." The boy who had been standing beside Sirius grinned and joined the two of them. "The reserve is Joe Callus." The burly guy who had nailed me in the chest walked silently over.

James went on. When someone's name was called they'd join the steadily growing group. The keepers, only two having tried out, were Jack and Zeke. The Seeker was small third year named Billy Clarke, who apparently had a sister in our year. I wonder if she was the one who waved to me at breakfast. The reserve seeker was a fourth year, Aaron Mitchell.

Finally James came to the Chasers. "Obviously, I'm one. Michael Turner," no surprise there. I held my breath. Could it possibly be me? "Darren Samuel."

What? I came all this way for _nothing_?

"The reserve is Jake Cole," James finished.

That's bloody helpful. Like they'll play their reserve chaser in the most important game of the year!

"Make sure to come to every practice. As you all should know, the game against Beauxbatons is only..."

I tuned him out. I knew when the game was, and how important it was. When James dismissed us, I dejectedly headed back up to the castle.

* * *

_Dear Lottie & Claire,_

_Still covering for me, right? I fear my spattegroit won't go away any time soon._

_Or maybe I'll make a miraculous recovery. If I'm totally honest, I'll admit this: Hogwarts isn't what I expected._

_I don't even really know what I was expecting! _

_But I didn't make the team. Well, I did but as a reserve. My talent is wasted here. I'm kidding, Claire, stop rolling your eyes!_

_Apparently, the Hogwarts versus Beauxbatons game is really intense, they take it pretty seriously here._

_I share a room with the captain of the team, and his three best friends (one of which is also on the team - beater). The captain himself is admittedly very attractive, his name is James. Sirius, the beater, has that kind of rebel look in his eye that Jake has. No, Lottie, I don't think he has a girlfriend, but you live in France, so what could you do?_

_Remus and Peter are the last two. Remus is a sweetheart, but Peter is just... quiet, I suppose._

_But I don't fit in at all! I know, I sound horribly whiny right now. But I find it to be a dilemma. I didn't realize boys were so hormone-driven, they make girls seem calm!  
_

_Ugh._

_Anyways, I hope you two are having a much better time than I am. We're allowed to go to this shopping village thing on the weekends, how bout you guys get a day pass away this saturday, I can be Lily for the day, and we can meet up?_

_Cheers._

_xoxo-_

_Lily_

After getting very, _very_ specific instructions from Bridget (which I wrote down) I made my own way to the Owlery right before lunch, as everyone was heading to the Great Hall. I took out more parchment and scribbled the note out to Claire and Lottie, then found a great big barn owl willing to take it to France. I leaned against the stone, watching the owl disappear, heading south. If they were quick about it, I could have a reply after dinner.

I sighed tragically, and followed the directions backwards towards the Great Hall, where the beautiful smell of warm food wafted towards me. I sat myself down beside Bridget and ate with as much gusto as I damn well pleased, only feeling _slightly_ guilty when I sprayed what's-her-face-with-the-black-hair (Zoe?) with half-chewed potatoes when she asked me a question.

* * *

"So... Jake. What's goin' on with you and Perrotta?"

I looked at James blankly when he asked me that. Who the hell was Perrotta?

"Bridget," he clarified exasperatedly.

"Oh," I said intelligently. We were all in the Common Room. Remus, Sirius, and Peter all in a game of Exploding Snap, and James reading some sort of British Quidditch Magazine. It was just after dinner, after I had again sat with Bridget and her friends, having none of my own.

"She just showed me around today, and invited me to sit with her and her friends, just so I - you know - get my bearings a bit, I guess," I said lamely.

"Oh. Cool," He said.

Conversationalist he was not.

"Why?" I asked, after about a minute of silence, me waiting for him to spill. Sirius let out a bark of laughter.

"James has been chasing Perrotta's tail for since sixth year," he said, waving me off dismissively, like "oh, you foolish child". James threw a piece of balled parchment at him.

"Oh, yeah," I said lamely. I could already think of Lottie saying to me: " _This is your chance! Socialize! Be a boy!_ " "Yeah, she's er.. got a nice arse."

A hush fell over the small area we were taking up. Remus and Peter looked at me as though scared for my life, Sirius looked like he was seeing me sprout wings, and James looked around the room nervously.

"You don't talk about her like that," he warned once he was certain she was not in the room. I'll admit it, I leaned closer. The first bit of Hogwarts gossip! "Fifth year she had this boyfriend, he was a seventh year. I suppose they were pretty serious, but he dumped her for some slag from Hufflepuff. She was devastated, hasn't even looked at a guy since then. Well, 'cept for you," he added somewhat sourly.

I felt guilty.

"That's horrible," I mumbled, "I mean.. I feel so bad for her, hiding all that pain inside, it must be killing her!"

They gave me weird looks.

"I mean.. I can relate, you know? It's just... hard, thinking back and realizing everything you knew was just a lie, you know? Everything they said... every touch... every kiss-"

"Right, well, we'd better get going," Sirius said, standing up simultaneously with James, Remus, and Peter, who were all sending me weirded out looks. The almost tripped over themselves getting up to the dormitory.

"Cause - cause you just can't get them to shut up most of the time, you know?" I called up in an attempt at redemption.

No dice.

UGH!

I slouched in my chair, hitting myself repeatedly in the head, almost not noticing the tapping on the window. I looked up miserably and saw the owl I had sent out earlier that day. They replied!

I ran to the window and threw it open, letting the bird fly in. I took the letter off its leg and it ruffled its wings, taking off to the Owlery before I could send it off again. Rolling my eyes, I unfurled the letter.

_(Lottie)_ **(Claire)**

_Lily!_

**Is it really so horrible?**

_Yeah, aren't the attractive boys enough to keep you company? (nudge nudge) We already miss you dreadfully and your insistent whining!_

**Ignore her, she's in one of her moods**

There was a line of what looked like ink splatter, as though they'd been fighting over the quill.

**Anyways, I'm sure it wasn't so bad! The Quidditch thing will get better, I'm sure of it! We're all miserable over here, we have nothing to do! Kate wants to gather the team together for secret practices, but Madame Maxime caught her and Meredith trying to sneak out. It wasn't pretty.**

_While Quidditch is very important, I'm sure, you're social life is much more important. Thankfully, I have a plan._

**Oh dear Merlin.**

_Again with the interruptions. Anyways, Lily, we'd love to come this saturday! I'll fill you in that morning, just tell us where to Floo and we'll be there!_

**I'm not responsible for whatever it is she cooks up.**

_Love you! Be good!_

**See you, Lils! xo**

**Claire and** _Lottie_

I smiled just at seeing their handwriting, baffled as to how they could argue in a letter. I walked up to the dormitory, in much higher spirits than before.

I didn't even notice Sirius stepping away not-so-subtly when I walked in the door, and simply lay down on my bed, shutting the curtains, not bothering to change out of my school robes.

Somehow, even though I knew whatever Lottie had come up with wouldn't be very practical, it cheered me up just thinking I'd be with them. It had only been two days, yet it felt like an eternity!

I fell asleep with a smile on my face.


	5. Lottie's Plan

** Chapter 5: Lottie's Plan **

"This isn't going to work."

"Shut up, Claire, yes it is. Fix your dress."

"I can't even walk in these heels!"

"They're two inches. _Barely_. You'll live, it's just two minutes out of your life."

" _Why_ are we doing this again?"

"Lily here is a horrible boy-"

"Hey!"

"It's true, don't deny it. Anyways, we need to make her seem cooler. And this is the only way she can get a boost."

"Thanks," I replied dryly.

Really, when Lottie first told me her plan I burst out laughing.

I mean, _really_?

I was shocked Claire even agreed.

She isn't the one for dresses.

But anyways, Claire stuck her head out of the girl's lavatory, where we currently were.

"All clear," she informed us. We scurried out of there as fast as we could, not wanting to be seen.

It was the first Saturday of the term, and Lottie and Claire had indeed gotten day passes to come 'help' me.

Before any of the teachers or students could see them in their... questionable attire, we booked it out of the castle, making our way down the dirt path to Hogsmeade.

"So, tell us, Lils, how _is_ Hogwarts? We didn't get much out of your letter," Claire said, watching her feet to make sure she didn't trip over anything.

"It's... strange. I mean, I've got the same classes and everything, it's just weird seeing it through the eyes of a boy."

"You could write a book. _Through Masculine Eyes: A Story of How One Brave Woman Threw Away Her Femininity For Quidditch_ ," Lottie suggested dramatically, moving her hand through the air with each word.

"That's a bit of a mouth full for a title, don't you think?" I asked, wrinkling my nose, reminded of my 'Quidditch Issue'. I had practiced alone every morning at five until breakfast, desperate to get better. I _had_ to make the starting team before the Beauxbaton's game! Otherwise, why was I even here?

Lottie just shrugged, falling silent as we reached the gate leading to Hogsmeade. She gave me one last reassuring smile and a "Remember, stand right next to their table. We'll wait by the bathroom."

I was suddenly nervous.

This was crazy. And stupid.

"Oh!" Lottie was suddenly back, "Don't call us by our real names, only say 'baby' or 'honey' or something like that."

"Why?" I asked, alarmed.

Lottie rolled her eyes, "It makes it look like you don't know our names, like.. you've got so many girls you don't bother keeping track, or something." She saw my doubtful look. "They'll eat it up, trust me."

I snorted. This wasn't going to work.

Blokes weren't _that_ thick and hormone-driven.

Were they?

Lottie joined Claire around the back of the _Three Broomsticks_ , using the back exit to get in. I used the front door, walking in confidently, my chin up, slouched slightly, walking slow.

I felt _so bloody stupid_.

I scanned the room, finding James, Remus, and Sirius in a booth, Peter walking towards them carrying four mugs of butterbeer. James caught my eye for less than a second before whispering something frantically to Sirius, and then they were signaling to Peter to hurry up. As I watched, they pulled Peter in his seat, and they all immediately spread out in their seats. A booth large enough for six now barely contained four extremely stretched out boys.

Subtle gits.

I leaned against the wall next to their booth, jerking my chin, giving them a "'Sup?".

They returned with half-hearted nods, avoiding my gaze.

Well then.

The girl's bathroom was around a corner, and from where I stood I could see just past the corner, about half of the door. Lottie and Claire were peeking around the corner, and I locked eyes with Lottie. We both nodded simultaneously, and she started walking towards me, causing more than a few heads to turn.

Her naturally curly brown hair was straight and, for some reason, blonde. It was much longer than her preferred shoulder-blade style. She had side-bangs, the fringe hitting just below her eyebrows. Her freckles were gone, too. She looked really pretty, but not much like Lottie.

May I take this opportunity to say that Lottie, no matter how girly she may be, was not a slut. She's theatrical, funny, likes to laugh, loves _watching_ Quidditch but not playing, and is a tad insane. She was the one I went to whenever I had an idea that needed executing, because she was the one who didn't care much about getting caught. Sneak out after curfew to go to a party? She'd be the one to go ahead (unnecessary ninja rolls and all) to make sure the coast was clear. She once snuck out of Beauxbatons and went to the closest civilization (a couple miles away) when I woke up in the middle of the night, needing tampons. However, by the time she got back, I had already just woken up Claire to see if she had some. Of course she did, much to Lottie's indignation when she came back with a box.

However, with all her goodness, she did look rather... promiscuous in her getup.

She was wearing a very, _very_ short skirt and purple tube top that didn't _quite_ meet the top of the skirt, so a strip of her summer-tanned stomach was showing. She had on stilettos, and it took me less than a second to recognize them as Kate's'. Kate used to be on the Quidditch Team with me and Claire, along with her best friend Meredith. Kate and Meredith shared a dorm with me, Claire, and Lottie. On her last birthday her cousin sent her the shoes, and we all (including Kate) doubled over laughing, the heel being at least five inches high. We named them the 'Stripper Heels'. Kate never wore them, and we used them for a chuckle every now and then, remembering the look on Kate's face when she opened the box on the day of her birthday (a mix of shock and horror).

Lottie wore them rather well, though. For all of her lack of coordination on a broom, she could walk very well in heels. Her hips swayed with every step, her eyes locked on mine. In my peripheral vision, I could see the Marauders looking up, wondering who this new girl was.

"Jake!" She cried loudly and embraced me. I glanced over to the boys and saw them all with their eyebrows raised. Sirius even muttered in James's ear, just audible enough for me to hear "What is that fit bird doing talking to _him_?"

Thanks, buddy.

However, Lottie was now right on top of me, holding both of my hands, her eyes practically screaming, _"Say something, idiot!"_

"Babe! How you 'doin?" I finally said, glad that my voice didn't shake. Lottie smirked, recognizing my small victory.

"Oh, not the same without _you_..." She trailed off, pouting at me. She trailed her index finger from my nose over my lips.

"I know, I know," I said, starting to enjoy myself. I could be as conceited as I wanted! "New school, new babe pool, you can't expect me to keep up with all of my old.. friends." I said, winking. While I said this, Lottie was helping me out with breathy sighs and sad "yeah.."'s.

"I've been thinkin' about you _a lot_..." she said, glancing over to the boys, who all looked like they were just hit with shovels, "like at _night_..."

"Sweet," I said, unsure of what else to say, because right now I felt like laughing until I threw up, half because of Lottie's performance, half because of the look on the boys' faces.

"And _late_..." she trailed off, biting her lip.

James leaned across the table and said the other guys, "Okay, did she just say that...?" And they all gave him dumbfounded looks.

Lottie gave a big mournful sigh, and intertwined our fingers.

"It was _so great_ to see you," she said, her large brown eyes looking like she actually meant it. She leaned in, her lips puckered.

I kissed two of my fingers and pressed them to her lips. She turned around, gave a happy sigh, and started walking back towards Claire, who knew to duck out of sight.

I turned to the Maruders, "Psh.. women." I rolled my eyes.

They all chuckled uncertainly, "Hah-hah, yeah..."

After a quick glance to Lottie and Claire, I saw Claire coming down the aisle of tables towards me.

James had just been saying, "So, uh, Jake, how exactly do you know her-" but stopped when he saw Claire coming down.

Claire, compared to Lottie, was much more calm. She's very funny, determined, one of those who, when told she couldn't do something, would do it. She was a lot like me in that respect (what with the going to the boy's tryouts with me). She is the type of person who never backs down from a dare. Truth or Dare is the funniest game when playing with Claire. You always save your really stupid ones for her. Once, when we were in our third year, she ended up spending the night underneath a seventh year's bed. A boy seventh year. And said boy never knew a thing. In all of her sweet, funny, amazing Quidditch-playing glory, was not one for dresses. Really. I don't know what it was. She could handle skirts, short-shorts, and everything but _dresses_. I didn't understand it at all. Hell, she probably would've been more comfortable in Lottie's outfit.

When Claire came sashaying up to me, the Marauders again let their jaws drop.

I was having quite a lot of fun with this.

Claire was decked out in a mid-thigh, thin strapped dress, a dark blue that went well with her black hair. Or it would have, since her hair was for some reason a light brown, and cut up to her shoulders. Her eyes were shining, either from the fact that she was having fun too, or was already planning Lottie's funeral. I couldn't really tell.

"Jake, is that you?" She said, coming up, giving me a hug.

"Oh hey, wassup?" I said. ("Okay, who's _this_ one now?" I heard from one of the blokes behind me. Maybe Remus?)

"I've missed you so much. I mean, our school lost it's best player, Jake Cole," she said, flashing me a winning smile.

I took her hand and leaned against the wall.

"Well," I cleared my throat, looking nonchalant, "The time comes for a man to move on, you know?"

She wrapped my arm around her shoulders, giving me a side-hug, pouting into my shoulder.

"I know, Jake," she looked up, looking sad. "In the end I just wasn't woman enough for you,"

"No you weren't," I said, shaking my head sadly.

"And that's just something I'll have to live with," I swear to God, Merlin, Buddha, or whoever you pray to, she was tearing up. She sniffled, "It's just hurts, that all," her voice wavered.

"Love is pain," I said, shrugging, a smile barely contained from appearing on my face.

"Just know," she suddenly said, her eyes blazing the way they did whenever she came within three feet of the snitch, "I'll never forget you. Ever-r-r-r!" She turned away and ran out of the bar dramatically, wiping fake tears from her eyes.

I would've believed it if I didn't see Lottie give her a high five, Claire silently laughing her head off.

I scoffed and said to the Maruaders, "Needy," and shook my head.

They laugh, and James elbowed Sirius, giving him a look that clearly meant something, I just didn't understand it.

I walked towards the back exit (to meet with Lottie and Claire, and congratulate them on their exquisite performances) and heard James say, "We may need to do a little reevaluating, here..." Hah! They fell for it!

I practically skipped.

Lottie tugged me into the corner, out of sight from everyone.

"How'd it go?" she asked. She and Claire looked like themselves, their hair back to normal, Lottie's sprinkling of freckles back. Whew! They had just done some quick charms.

"Awesome! You guys were brilliant!" I whispered excitedly.

Claire grinned and Lottie laughed. "We try," Lottie said, winking.

"Why'd you change your hair, though?" I asked, frowning.

"We're going to have to come back for the game, we don't want them to recognize us... too awkward," Claire informed me.

"Oh. Right. Good thinking."

We all looked around the corner to see how the four guys were taking it, when a girl wearing jeans and a halter top went up to their table. She looked kind of familiar...

"Hey there, pretty lady," Sirius said in what I suppose was a flirtatious tone.

The girl, however, looked horrified.

"Ew. Wha- What, are you _hitting_ on me?"

Sirius looked shocked for a second, and spluttered something out, but the girl cut across from him.

"No. Let me put a stop to that right now: Girls, with asses like mine, do not talk to boys, with faces like yours," she said harshly. James, Remus, and Peter were all openly laughing. I thought it was ridiculous.

Not that they were laughing, because it was amusing to see a girl insult Sirius.

But Sirius was _hot_. His face looked a lot better than this girl's butt, let me tell you.

However, I had little time to dwell on this fact.

"I'm looking for my boyfriend, Jake. Jake Cole. Have you seen him?"

Those words did not just come out of her mouth.

James gave her a bored look and waved his hand vaguely towards the back door, where they had last seen me go.

Claire and Lottie pulled me back, out of sight.

_"What should I do?"_

_"Get out there!"_

_"She'll recognize me!"_

_"Who the hell is she anyways?"_

_"I didn't know Jake had a girlfriend!"_

_"He's never mentioned her before, I'm sure of it!"_

_"Wait! No! Yes! I've seen them around! Damnit, what's her name?"_

_"Well, we don't know now do we!"_

_"Guys, she's getting closer.."_

_"Lottie, hurry up your mind!"_

_"Don't pressure me- Monica! That's her name! Go Lily, go!"_

She pushed me out into the open where I stumbled and just barely stayed on my feet. I caught the eyes of the very scared looking Lottie and Claire.

" _Jake?_ " I heard the girl - Monica - say.

All right.

I'll admit it.

I panicked.

" _Keep away from me!"_ I shouted and shoved past her, looking for the closest thing to cover my face with. Two pitchers of butterbeer.

"Jake, where are you going?" She called.

"Don't come any closer!" I said over my shoulder, hastily running towards the door.

"Just let me talk to you!"

"I don't want to talk to you, Crazy!" I said, putting the pitchers down and yanking a menu from a waitress's hands, using it as a mask and turning to face Monica.

"Just _come here_!"

"You're hot, Monica, _smokin'_ hot!"

"Would you _stop it_?"

Oh god, she was coming closer.

"But there are _plenty_ of hot girls out there!" I thought I heard Sirius whoop "Yeah there are!" but I wasn't sure.

"What are you talking about?" Monica called, swerving past people to try and get to me - er Jake.

"A-and the truth is!" I said, ducking behind the bar, "You have absolutely _nothing_ else to offer!"

"Come back here and talk to me right now!"

Somehow I had ducked, shoved, and avoided Monica'ed my way back in front of the Marauder's table, using my butterbeer pitchers to hide my face again.

I felt something emotional and girly rising in me, which I use as my excuse to why I said this:

"And when I close my eyes, I see you for what you _truly are_!" Too girly. I need more testosterone, say something shallow that only a guy would say! "Which is _UG-LAYY._ We're _done!_ " Perfect.

And then I threw the drinks in my hands in her face.

Which was totally accidental.

I swear.

" _AAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!_ " Monica screamed and turned around, running out of the bar, with everyone laughing.

When the door slammed behind her, a cheer rose up from all corners of the bar, all Hogwarts boys raising their mugs to me. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter, came up to me and patted me on the back, laughing, and saying things like "That was _brilliant_!" "You're the man, Jake!" and I heard James say, "What's wrong with you guys? Scoot over and make some room for him!"

I saw Claire and Lottie smile, high-five each other, and sneak out the back.

James locked eyes with me from across the table and said quite seriously, "You. You are my new idol." And gave me a fist pound.

My first fist-pound!

We clinked mugs and toasted to how Totally Awesome I was.


	6. I Make a Deal With the Devil

** Chapter 6: I Make a Deal with The Devil **

"You da _man_!"

"Make way for the Holy One!"

Now, on one hand, I _loved_ the outcome of Lottie's idea. I had a place to sit during meals! The Marauders always saved me a seat during class! Even the professors seemed nicer.

But on the other, for _exactly the same reasons_ I hated the outcome.

All I did was hug two pretty girls, and break up with a bitchy one.

WHY WAS THAT SO AWESOME?

PLEASE, EXPLAIN IT TO ME.

Boys are stupid.

I'm going lesbian.

And the worst part was, if I ever expressed these views aloud, I'd go right back to the weird looks and "Dude, is this guy for real?"'s.

Not the lesbian part. Well, maybe that too, but mostly the wondering why my involvement with the pretty and bitchy girls suddenly made me Hogwarts Famous.

"Oi, Jake, I've got some issues with this girl..."

"No problem, I got a lifetime of knowledge," I deadpanned, but Peter didn't seem to notice.

"Well, you see, there's this girl I really like..."

I stopped listening, but nodded every few seconds as though I was actually thinking of how to help.

"...and so, should I just tell her? That I like her?"

"Okay, the first rule: Never tell a girl you like her," I advised, "it just makes you look like an idiot. And a little desperate, like you'd been watching her for long enough to develop these feelings, but not talking to her. Go up to her and make conversation. And then just ask her to do dinner, or to meet at the _Three Broomsticks,_ and then you two can get to know each other, and you can decide _then_ whether or not you like her. All right?"

"Yeah, okay. Thanks, Jake!"

"No problem, Peter."

I wonder what he was talking to me about.

Anyways, we'd reached the Potions classroom, Professor Slughorn's large belly was bouncing merrily as he walked up to the line of students waiting outside of it.

"Hello, hello, class!" He said joyfully. There were a few halfhearted greetings returned. He opened the doors and we spilled into the classroom.

We had Potions with the Slytherins today. I slid into the seat next to James, who was sitting next to Sirius. Remus and Peter took the table in front of us.

"We're picking Potions partners today, everyone!" Slughorn said over enthusiastically as the last of the students came in, mainly a gaggle of Gryffindor Girls. Everything about this man was happy, from his Santa-like beard to the large belly, to his voice that always sounded like it was his birthday.

"Oh, man, she's in this class!" I suddenly heard James say beside me. I followed his gaze and saw Bridget with two other girls, who didn't bother taking seats since they'd most likely change them. Just behind them I could see Snape lurking.

"Hey, quit blushing!" I said, nudging his shoulder, "that's lame!"

"Shut up," James muttered, "I'm not blushing."

Slughorn tapped an empty cauldron with his wand and it filled with bits of parchment with our names on them. He went around half of the room, each student taking out a piece of paper and calling out the name they received. Me, James, and Sirius were in his circuit, and Sirius picked out a piece of paper. "Harley Pensky," he read aloud. Across the room, one of the girls talking to Bridget looked up, and Sirius smiled flirtatiously at her. She was pretty, with waist-length lightly curled brown hair pulled into a high pony tail and large hazel-green eyes. She grinned and waved, then picked up her books and took the empty seat next to him.

James rustled the papers for a few minutes before picking a rolled up slip of parchment. He glanced up at Bridget, who was now chatting with another girl, this one with black hair. James unrolled the parchment, than said in an almost pained tone, "Ulyssa Winston."

Peter slammed his hand down on his desk in frustration, and we all looked at him. "I lost a bet," he said lamely.

James took his time gathering his stuff, as though putting off the moment when he'd have to sit beside Ulyssa, who was really not that bad. She was just quiet, and seemed to like studying more than socializing. James looked like he was about to go to the guillotine. I hit him with my roll of parchment. "Be nice!"

Boys kept their brains in their penises, I tell you.

I took the piece of parchment closest to me. "Bridget Perrotta," I read aloud. Bridget looked at me, smiled, and nodded in acknowledgment.

" _What_?" James hissed, looking at me, outraged. "I can't believe you got her as your partner," HAH! All the lesbian jokes I could make, "Come on, switch me!" He thrust his paper at me, grabbing at my hand and trying to take mine.

"What? No! I read her name out loud, I can't do that!" I whispered back, and with a final jerk of my hand, I pushed him out of his seat, forcing him to go sit with Ulyssa.

Bridget came over and took James's unoccupied seat, James throwing her a look of longing that she didn't catch.

"Hello again!" she said brightly, arranging her books on the desk. In front of us, Remus was working with the black-haired girl Bridget had been talking to earlier, Zoe something-or-other, and Peter with Snape, who kept throwing me dirty looks and spent more time looking at Bridget than helping Peter.

Bridget and I worked silently for about ten minutes, glancing up every now and then to check the directions on the board.

"Here, Jake, you need to cut up this salamander and get a tablespoon of blood."

She was kidding right?

Nope. Bridget pushed a limp lizard thing onto my side of the desk, along with a scalpel.

I gulped, and said, "I'm not gonna lie. The whole blood thing? I can't handle it. You're on your own with this one." And pushed the dead animal back to her.

She look at me with unblinking eyes before saying, "Wow. _No_ guy I know would have admitted that."

Oh crap, she's right. I spluttered for a few seconds before she said, "No, no! It's not bad! I actually think it's really sweet."

Yep, that's me, sweet little Lily-Jake-Evans-Cole.

"No parchment near open flames!" Came a random voice, making me jump. Looking up, I saw Snape had risen from his seat and was holding a slightly crumpled piece of parchment that must have come from one of Jake's books.

"Oh? What's this?" Bridget asked, taking the parchment from Snape. He looked like a dog that was about to hump someone's leg.

Ew, gross image.

"Is this a poem?" Bridget asked, holding the parchment aloft. Squinting at it, I realized it was the song Jake had been writing for a couple weeks before school started.

"Lyrics," I corrected, rolling my eyes. Who kept a song in a Potions book? "They're his - _my_ \- uh - my old stuff," I said awkwardly, playing with my collar. Bridget smiled kindly.

" _Wake up, I've been waiting for you..._ " She read the song aloud, but fell silent after only a couple of lines, a small frown forming on her face. When she finished, she looked at me.

"This is _really_ good," she said genuinely, "so honest and open. It's powerful."

"Oh," I said, "thank you. I mean, yeah. Thanks," I said. I, personally, had no idea what the song was about. Or what all the lyrics were, for that matter. Usually Jake would kidnap me and play his newest song and asked my opinion, but I guess it hadn't been finished when he left.

"Well, we go to a school for _magic_ , not learning how to write songs that will never get us anywhere," Snape said haughtily, turning back to correct whatever mistake Peter made on their potion.

"I don't know, Severus, Jake may go somewhere with his music," Bridget said, ignoring his obvious insult. Little did she know that Jake was already touring around Europe with one of the best known wizard bands.

Snape scoffed and didn't talk to us for the rest of the class.

Me and Bridget worked on our potion for the rest of class, no different. Although I caught her giving me side-looks more than once. And her hand brushed mine a lot more than it really should have when we were seated two feet apart.

She's just being friendly.

Right?

* * *

After class we all filed out into the hallway. I made my way towards the Charms classroom, when I felt someone tug my collar, forcing me to spin around.

"Ow - what are you - James?" I spluttered. He sat me down on a nearby bench and glanced around to make sure no one was watching, then leaned in.

Woah, was he about to kiss me? Not that I'm not flattered and all, but I'm apparently a boy, and that would mean James was gay. Which was actually pretty disheartening. All the attractive ones were gay.

"Did you say anything about me?" he asked when our faces were about a foot apart.

Oh. He was talking about Bridget. That was a relief. Kind of.

"No..." I started, and he made a frustrated gesture, "was I _supposed_ to?"

"Jake! Come on," he said "This - this is _perfect_! She'll talk to _you_ , you get to spend an hour with her three times a week! You can talk to her, and _convince her to go out with me_!" He said the last part with the fierce determination he normally saved for Quidditch.

This boy needed a hobby.

Or, well, another one that wasn't Quidditch. Since he seemed to have too much time to spend obsessing over this girl.

"She's had that option for about seven years now," I pointed out.

James swore, and sat silent for a few seconds, then looked at me with a smile on his face that meant he had an idea.

Lord help me, I don't think I could take any more ideas right now.

"Tell you what," he said, "If you do this for me, I'll work with you on your Quidditch! Make you good enough to replace Darren as a starter."

My eyes were the size of saucers.

"Are you serious? In time for the Beauxbaton's game?" I clarified.

"Absolutely," James promised.

"Okay, yeah!" I smiled, "Yeah, you got yourself a deal."

James looked like all his dreams were coming true.

"You're the man," he said.

"Yes I am!" I replied, jumping up.

* * *

"Mr. Potter, if you would please call your team together, I have an announcement!"

I looked down, seeing Professor McGonagall standing near the locker rooms. James and I were up in the air, passing the Quaffle, and me doing various sorts of drills that would apparently help my Quidditch skill. It was the next day, and James certainly kept his promise.

_"OI! Jake, get up!"_

_"Mmpf?" I mumbled, blearily looking up from my pillow just as the curtains on my bed were drawn back. James stood, already dressed in his Quidditch Robes, carrying his broom._

_"Get up, we're going down to the pitch. Your training officially begins today!"_

_"What time is it?" I said sleepily, looking around. There were no clocks._

_"Five-fifteen," James answered easily, as though he always woke this early. You never know, maybe he did._

_"What!" I stage-whispered, now not wanting to wake the rest of the boys._

_"Just get up, we'll be done before breakfast," he said impatiently, making his way to his own bed._

_I stumbled out of mine, pulling clothes out of my trunk and going into the bathroom._

_"We need to get better lights in here!" He called to me after I finished touching up my face._

_"Why?" I asked, pulling on my robes._

_"I dunno, your eyes just looked_ really _green for a second."_

_Well. It was nice to know the charms worked._

It was now probably around seven. He had me flying laps, swerving through obstacles, avoiding bludgers, and teaching me how to throw a hit and not get called a foul for it.

All the things I needed to become a better player, to be sure.

But now Professor McGonagall was indicating for us to get on the ground. We flew down and stood in front of her.

"Mr. Potter, if you would please call your team together, I have an announcement you may want to hear," she repeated in a normal tone.

"All righty, Professor," James said almost cautiously. He jogged up to the castle and returned fifteen minutes later with the whole team, who all looked anxious. What could be so important that their Head of House was involving herself in the issue _?_

We all gathered in the Locker Room, McGonagall looking over it with a clinical eyes, tactfully choosing to ignore the athletic cups strewn across haphazardly. I tried to ignore them too.

"This year, Professor Dumbledore and Madame Maxime have decided to try for some... ah, school civility," she began. "Obviously, in the past, our schools have not gotten along or been very sportsmanlike to each other," she gave a critical look to Remus, who came along with Sirius when James went and fetched them. He flushed and ducked his head.

"Professor Dumbledore decided that the best way for the schools to get along is to have us host Beauxbaton's Quidditch Team and Club," Is that what they were calling the girl's team nowadays? "For both of the teams to participate in a mature, civilized gathering."

She was greeted by many confused looks.

"A dance," she clarified. Immediately the team started talking, asking questions all at once, until Sirius's voice could be head above the others.

"Professor, are we allowed to accompany the French girls to this dance?" He asked mischievously, "I say the best way for us to be civil is for us to get to know them on a more personal note, wouldn't you agree?"

McGonagall sighed, "Yes, Mr. Black, you may ask the ladies of the Beauxbaton Quidditch Club to accompany you to this dance." He grinned triumphantly. "Just as the young men from the Beauxbatons Team may ask to accompany one of the ladies from the Hogwarts Quidditch Club."

Woah, woah, Hogwarts had a Quidditch Club for the girls, too?

Why didn't I ever hear about this?

Oh right.

I'm apparently a boy. Why would they tell a boy about it?

"If there are no more questions, you may all go to breakfast now. The Beauxbatons students will arrive next week, three weeks before the game," she ended.

Claire will be coming with them! So will Kate and Meredith! All I needed was Lottie and it would be perfect!

"Potter, Black, Lupin, if you would stay behind, please," she added as the rest of left the Locker Room.

All of us were talking about the dance, about half of them were teasing Ryan about wanting to take some girl named Bailey to the dance. But apparently Bailey was Bill's older sister, and she was in our year. Bill, our seeker, kept saying he'd put in a good word for him, to which Ryan would chase him around the crowd of us. Even I couldn't help but laugh at that.

We made our way up to the castle, taking the empty seats at the end of the Gryffindor table, all of the boys digging into their porridge and sausages with great gusto.

As I left the Hall early to get a shower in my dorm room, I heard Bill shout at Ryan, (well within the earshot of his older sister):

"Hey, Ryan! Should I tell Bay to wear something pretty for the dance?"

I hope he lived. Ryan packed quite a punch.


	7. I Hold Up My End of the Deal

** Chapter 7: I Hold Up My End of the Deal   
**

_Hey Lils!_

_Miss me? What's going on? How's Beauxbatons, still as awful as I remember?_

_Hah, I love how I can say I never have to step foot in that place again._

_Anyways, you sorted things out with Hogwarts, right? I haven't gotten angry letters from the school or my parents so I assume everything is going swimmingly. I'll be back by October 12._

_This tour is **so cool**. We opened up the show, and the crowd **flipped!** They loved us!_

_A couple days ago we did a small gig in Germany, and they wanted an encore, so we played an acoustic version of one of my songs. They went nuts for my lyrics!_

_I'm honestly having the time of my life right now._

_But anyways, I'm sorry I didn't talk much last time you saw me. I can't believe they cut the girl's Quidditch Team, that's bullshit. I hope you didn't yell at any professors._

_Actually, I hope you did. And that one of your girls recorded it for me so I can watch it for my own enjoyment.  
_

_Maud, you know, our drummer? 'Says they cut the team because they bought the latest racing brooms for the Guy's team so they could beat Hogwarts in the annual game. Sucks for my home team, huh? There's no way they can win unless they happen to have a whole bunch of Nimbus 1500's up their sleeves._

_But it doesn't really matter, I guess you want Beauxbatons to win anyways, use all your anger and channel it into being the best damn Quidditch Cheerleader there ever was. (:_

_I gotta go, we're about to go on again._

_See you at Christmas, probably!_

_-Jake  
_

The letter was delivered Saturday morning accompanied by a black T-Shirt with Jake playing the guitar and singing in front of a large crowd, the rest of the band spilling behind him, the words 'Free Fall' in white, block letters underneath. It looked pretty cool, so I folded it carefully and stuck it in my pocket, then wrote out a quick reply.

_Hey Jay,_

_Haha, that rhymed!_

_Of course I miss you and your running-away-from-parents-ways._

_Oh, Beauxbatons is the same as ever._

_Yep, Hogwarts is all sorted out. They won't even notice you were gone._

_Really? That's great! I found some of your lyrics in your Potions book, did you ever finish that song?_

_I'm really glad you're enjoying yourself. Just don't do anything stupid while your off becoming famous, ok?_

_It is bullshit, isn't it? There were a few brave attempts to still hold practice, but they were shot down pretty quickly. Now we're just a 'Quidditch Club', but we get to go to the Hogwarts game, so I suppose that's cool._

_No, I didn't yell at any proffessor. Honestly, what type of girl do you think I am?  
_

_WHAT! Are you SERIOUS? That's so stupid! And it **should** be against the rules, Hogwarts rivalry be damned._

_I don't know, I kind of want Hogwarts to win. Payback for cutting the team, you know?_

_But I don't think w-they'll have much of a chance without the brooms... oh well._

_Have fun and good luck!_

_xoxo-_

_Lily  
_

I sent the owl on it's way and dug into my breakfast. James decided to tack on another training session last night, and I didn't get to eat dinner.

For the past few days, James worked me like a slave driver. Drills, penalty shots, running (apparently you needed to be able to run three miles in Quidditch. I don't even know), swerving, ducking, throwing, blocking. But I have to admit: It was sorta working. By Saturday (today), the first official practice since he started coaching me, I flew considerably better than Darren, the third Chaser on the team. He was new to the team, as was I, but he was faster and had better aim.

Well, NOT ANYMORE, _DARREN._

Although James still wouldn't bump me up to a starter.

_"You have to make it look like you got better all on your own! What will it look like if I just show up to practice and say, 'Sorry, Samuel, I've been giving Cole here some private lessons, so you're being bumped down to the reserve.' Yeah, that'll go over well."_

I suppose he had a point.

But still, I wanted to be able to write to Claire that I was finally a starter!

Which reminds me: I need to write a letter to her. And Lottie.

We were currently at practice. It was extremely windy, so James had the chasers working on strong passes on the ground, and had recruited Bill and Aaron (our Seekers, starter and reserve, respectively) to make it a game of keep away.

I was currently in the middle, moving around, trying to catch the Quaffle as the boys tossed it back and forth between themselves. Just as I glanced over my shoulder to see Sirius and Ryan having a game of beater-tennis (apparently a popular game at practices) I felt the Quaffle hit just below my hips.

" _Ooh!_ " echoed around me, all the boys cringing, and twisting their faces into looks of pain.

What?

Was I bleeding or something? I looked down, then realized my mistake.

Oh, right.

"OWW! OHH, FOR THE LOVE OF MERLIN! IT BURNS!"

I dropped to my knees, cupping my nonexistent genitals.

"Is he gonna puke?"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to throw that hard!"

"This is why we keep you as a Seeker, Bill."

"Should we get him to the Hospital Wing?"

"Bloody hell, I do not envy you."

"No no, I'll make it," I said weakly, getting to my feet, walking stiffly for a few seconds just for show.

"Are you sure? You may not want to get onto a broom after that," Sirius said, raising one eyebrow.

"We aren't practicing on brooms today anyways," I said waving him off.

Sirius nudged James, giving him a significant look, and James said, "Oh! Right! Guys, we have an announcement."

"Have you finally popped the Question, Sirius?"

"No, we aren't getting married. James and my's relationship is purely for the sex."

"That's healthy."

"You can't even ask Clarke's sister to the dance."

Ohhh, buuurrrrnnnn.

"Shut up, the pair of you!" James scolded. "McGonagall told us some distressing news, yesterday," he said gravely.

"Beauxbatons apparently cut their Girl's Quidditch Team to fund their bloke's team with top-of-the-line racing brooms," Sirius cut right to the chase.

Cries of outrage followed this. Having already known this, I kept quiet, but when everyone finally settled down (after a few choice words from Remus), I spoke up.

"What are we going to do about this?" I asked.

Sirius gave me a mischievous grin.

"Well, you see, I have a plan,"

"Merlin help us,"

"Shut up. Anyways, the only foreseeable solution is to also get better brooms. Prongs and I forked over some galleons, but we're still way short. We need a way to raise money, and quickly. We didn't tell you all about this because we still needed to check with Dumbledore that our plan was all right."

"Get to the point,"

"You lot are very rude. We've decided to host a fund-raiser in Hogsmeade, next weekend. The French lot is coming tomorrow, and we can pass it off as a welcome thing for them, and they'll unknowingly be helping us get our brooms. Any objections?"

No one spoke up. It was quite brilliant. But I'd forgotten Beauxbatons would be arriving tomorrow. That means the game was only three weeks away.

Insert gulp.

"What are we doing for this fund raiser?" Asked Joe, the reserve beater.

"Good question. Prongs, want to take this one?" Sirius stepped back, letting James take the spotlight.

"We're just having a carnival. There's a huge field a little past the Shrieking Shack. We'll clear a path to it, set up some booths, put a gate around it so no one gets in free. Tickets will be ten sickles each. We've got the House Elves preparing food to sell for it, Rosmerta is happily supplying the drinks, Sirius is enchanting the Suits of Armor in the castle to become a Quidditch Team, and you and a group of friends can play against them. You have to pay to do that too, though. Dumbledore said we could set up a hug slide for the younger students. Or the immature older ones," he gave Sirius a look, who shrugged innocently. "And just regular carnival stuff like face-painters and clowns and stuff."

"Prongs, you skipped over the most important part," Sirius prodded gently.

James rolled his eyes. "Sirius is also setting up two kissing booths, one for girls, and one for guys."

"Right-o, James!" Sirius said cheerfully, "I myself will have a thirty minute slot in the girl's kissing booth. Any of you can sign up as well. Amos Diggory and Fabian Prewett have donated their lips, and I suspect I'll have even more candidates by the end of the day when this thing goes public."

A lot of eye rolls followed this.

"The French can take a couple minutes of someone's shift if they both agree to it. Oh, and a couple of the Gryffindor ladies have decided to participate in this as well," he added innocently enough, but caused chuckles among the team, all looking at James, who was turning considerably redder.

"Would these girls happen to be in our year, Sirius, my good man?" Ryan asked, grinning widely.

"Why, it's funny you would ask that, Ryan, old chap, because they _would_ happen to be in our year!" Sirius said, "Care to take a guess who signed up?"

"Oh well, now that you mentioned it, I think I heard a certain Bridget mention som-"

"All right, all right, you bloody prats, we get it!" James said, rolling his eyes, "Perrotta's signed up for the kissing booth, all right?"

More laughter. I guess everyone knew how much James liked Bridget. Not that it wasn't somewhat obvious, but still.

"Go get showers, you guys stink worse than Padfoot's dirty socks," he commanded, waving us away, "Except for Cole and Samuel. You guys stay behind."

We stayed, and when the rest of the guys disappeared into the Locker Room, James began to speak.

"All right, Darren, you know I think you're a brilliant flier and a great addition to the team, but Jake's improved dramatically in the last week. It would be better for the team if he was bumped up to the starting position, and you play as a reserve."

Darren hung his head sadly. "I understand," he muttered.

I, however, was feeling totally different.

HAH! YES! AUSTEN, YOUR ASS IS ABOUT TO BE HANDED TO YOU BY LILY EVA - I MEAN JAKE COLE!

WOOOOOOOOOO!

It took all my self control to stop myself from doing a dance right in front of Darren. However, when he made his way back to the Locker Room to spread the news, I started dancing in front of James.

"Just remember you owe me something in return," he reminded me, putting a hand on my shoulder to calm me down. It didn't work. I continued to shake my hips.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I even have a plan formulated, don't worry," I said, doing a strange interpretations of the Jets from _West Side Story_ down the field to the Locker Room and get my clothes. I'd take a shower up in the castle. You never know when one of the guys will suddenly jerk the shower curtain open, asking for some shampoo.

* * *

"Hi, Bridget. Now, I don't want you to be worried, but Malcolm is missing."

I looked up from my textbook to see (surprise, surprise) Snape standing in front of Bridget, ignoring my existence (as usual). He was holding a piece of parchment with a picture of a large, hairy tarantula on it. Shuddering, I averted my gaze, and saw Bridget do the same.

"That's terrible!" she said, still not looking at the picture, "if I see him I'll send you a message, all right?"

"Ok. Oh, but don't feed him, he has a special food that is the only thing he can eat without irritating his bowels," Snape reminded her.

"Right," Bridget said, "because my first instinct is to feed the giant hairy spider," she said, laughing gently.

"Heh," Snape chuckled awkwardly and sat back down. I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

Across the room, James caught my eye and waved slightly, pointing to Bridget.

"Hmm..." I said contemplatively, "here's a wild idea!" Bridget looked up, cocking an eyebrow.

"Have you ever considered goin' on a date with James Potter?" I asked innocently, and when Bridget looked across the room at him (he smiling and giving a bashful wave) I added, "I see that, you'd make a good couple. Nice connection."

" _James?_ " Bridget said, as though not believing her ears.

"Yeah!"

"No."

"Yeah."

" _No._ "

"Yeah-"

"No-"

"Yeah-"

"No-"

"Yeah?"

"NO!" Bridget laughed, swatting my arm. She looked back to James, "I mean, he's good _looking_ and everything, but.. he's just... not the guy for me," she looked back up, fixing me with a stare.

"Huh," I said shrugging, "I think there may be more to him than you think there is."

Bridget scoffed. "Right, so he's not just another _dumb_ jock who just wants to hook up with me so he can tell all his friends about it and seem all cool, but is-"

"Too insecure to treat you as an equal?" I finished dryly, thinking of Austen. Bridget gave me a surprised look.

"Yes! Exactly!" she said, as though it was refreshing to hear.

"Hmpf. Tell me about it," I rested my chin in my hand, suddenly not in the mood to talk about relationships anymore.

"You know," Bridget began, "I think you're the first guy in this school who hasn't tried anything on me," she smiled.

Hah! If only she knew.

I chuckled, "Trust me, you're not my type!"

"What? Why not?" She grin faded.

I stopped smiling. What?

"Well \- I mean - you know," I cleared my throat awkwardly, "I just don't think of you in that way, you know? We're friends," I rolled my eyes, "You're actually one of the few people I feel comfortable around."

"I feel exactly the same way!" she said, an almost sad smile on her lips.

God, I meant it because you were a girl! Not like _that_!

"So, uh. Take my advice then," I said, changing the subject, "Go out with James."

She looked over to him, and I saw that he'd been watching our conversation.

"I'll consider it," Bridget said, looking back at me.

"Great," I said, wondering why it sounded slightly bitter.

It's not like _I_ wanted to go out with James.

Right?

Right!


	8. I Give James Girl Lessons

** Chapter 8: I Give James Girl Lessons **

"All right, who's the greatest person you've ever met?"

"What?"

I closed the door to our dormitory. It was just after lunch, and me and James had a free period. Remus was in Arithmancy, Peter was in the Common Room, reading, and who the hell knew where Sirius was?

"Bridget! I talked to her today during Potions!"

"That's fantastic, Jake, did you say anything about me?" he asked, a look of hope on his face.

"Duh! I got her to reconsider you, you're halfway in!"

"Yes!" He jumped up, punched the air, and walked in a circle, thinking. "So - so what should I do? Do I ask her out?"

"Ew, no. You don't want to freak her out!" I answered, shaking my head.

"Right, right. Agh," he looked stressed out. Jeez, it was just one girl!

"Look, just have a casual conversation with her," I suggested.

"Yeah, good plan," he said distractedly.

"Why do I get the feeling you don't do this very often?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.

James reddened.

"Well, I mean... I'm not that good at talking to girls!"

"Why? You're hot!"

"What?"

Those words did not just come out of my mouth. Nope. No sir.

By the look on James's face I'd say they did.

"Well \- I mean - you're an appealing guy. Man. G - guyman," I stammered. "I'm thinking this through a girl's point of view to help you out, all right?"

"Whatever," James shook his head, "as long as it helps."

Whew.

"So, what are we supposed to talk _about_?" He asked, running his hand through his already untidy hair.

No, I did not imagine doing the same, how rude of you to suggest otherwise!

"Anything! Everything! If you guys have a good connection it'll just come to you, you know?"

He gave me a doubtful look.

"All right," I said in a bossy voice, "get up, we're trying this out."

"What?"

"Look, just... go with it, all right? You be you, just act natural. 'Cause," I changed my voice back to my normal high-pitched-girly-tone, "I'm Lily. Hi, James? Nice to meet you!"

"Holy shi-" he stumbled backwards against his bedpost, "Wha - ? Mate, you just really sounded like a girl for a second there!"

"I used to imitate Lily all the time," I lied, shrugging like it was no big deal, "I got really good at it. Now get _up_ or else you'll never be able to talk to Bridget!" Oh no. How horrible.

God, where the hell were these thoughts _coming_ from?

Lottie spiked my morning pumpkin juice. That was it.

It didn't even matter that she was a couple countries away. She could do it.

"Er.. all right," James said awkwardly. He stuck his hands into his pockets, looking around the room. "So, uh. What do we talk about?"

"I don't know, ask me if I like..." I wracked my brain, "cheese!" I smiled.

James snorted. "Um, okay. Do you like.. cheese?"

I gasped happily. "Why yes I do! My favorite's gouda!" and smiled sweetly.

James laughed, "I uh... I like Gouda too?"

" _See_?" I said, hitting his shoulder.

"See _what_?"

"We're flowing!"

"We're talkin' about - cheese!"

"So what?" I said, shrugging, "Flow is _flow_."

"Hah - yeah, I suppose... what? What's that?"

We both looked down and saw a large, hairy, eight legged beast (more commonly referred to as a tarantula, but don't bother me with your details right now) crawling over James's foot.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?"

"AAAAAHHHHHH!"

We both jumped onto James's bed, waving our hands and screaming at the top of our lungs, trying to get it to go away, but it just kept coming closer.

"IT'S GETTING CLOSER TO YOUR BED!"

"WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO ABOUT IT?"

"I DON'T KNOW - SQUISH IT!"

"WHY DON'T YOU?"

"YOU'RE THE _GUY_ \- UHH - _BIGGER_ GUY, I'M SMALL AND WIMPY!"

"JUST SHUT UP, IT'S GETTING CLOSER!"

"JUMP ONTO SIRIUS'S BED!"

We both jumped away, and the spider came closer.

"WHAT DO WE DO?"

"REMUS! SIRIUS! PETER! SOMEONE COME IN HERE AND GET THE SPIDER!"

"AAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

We were clinging to each other, me dry-sobbing into his chest. At one moment we both looked up and yelled in unison:

"ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!"

We would make excellent pirates.

The spider neared the door, and James courageously leaped off the bed, circling around and opening the door, keeping his feet at least five feet away from the spider at all times. It crawled out the door and he slammed it shut, then turned to me. I didn't know that many veins could stick out of someone's neck.

"DON'T YOU - _EVER_ \- DO THAT GIRL VOICE AGAIN, YOU HEAR ME? FUCKING CREEPY!"

"Sorry!" I said, cringing, "my bad!"

He shuddered and walked back to his bed.

It was only when I was doing the same that I remembered something very important that could've made this experience much better:

I was a freaking witch. With a wand and everything.

I could have just levitated the spider out of here or something.

Maybe I shouldn't mention this to James. I don't think that many veins popping out of one's neck is healthy.

* * *

It was Sunday morning.

The day the Beauxbatons team would be coming to Hogwarts to spend three weeks at the castle.

Then play the game.

Then afterwords go to a stupid dance that was supposed to create sportsmanship.

Hah! Yeah right.

But that makes me sound bitter.

Anyways, I was most excited about seeing my girls again. Austen be damned, he'll wait until the game, but I planned on seeing Claire, Meredith, and Kate as much as possible.

I definitely didn't expect to see Lottie coming out of the Hogsmeade carriages with them.

"WHAT!" I gasped. James, Sirius, and the rest of the team looked at me. They all had looks of fierce determination on their face. Like they were determined not to show any emotion.

Haha, I'm funny.

We were gathered just outside the school entrance, at the end of the path that the horseless carriages took. In fours and fives the Beauxbaton's Quidditch Team and Club came out of the carriages.

In the third one, Claire, Meredith, Kate, and yes, _Lottie_ , all jumped out, laughing at a joke Meredith must have just told. They looked totally carefree, while the actual 'Team' was formed in a tight crowd, joining in the staring contest the Hogwarts Team had started.

I couldn't take my eyes off of my friends, though. It was almost surreal to see them. Sure, I saw Claire and Lottie just last week, but it was weird, like I was seeing them through guy's eyes.

Meredith was scanning our team, and caught my eye. She then whispered into Lottie's ear, pointing at me. Lottie followed her finger and saw me too, then smiled and nodded. Meredith nudged Kate and told her which one I was, and Kate (very helpful, Katey Kat, thank you) waved enthusiastically at me.

I smiled weakly and waved back.

"Now, I'm sure you are all wanting to... introduce yourselves," McGonagall said, eying both teams, wondering if this was such a great idea after all. Well of course it wasn't! There was so much tension in the air you could literally feel it on your skin. "So, let's start with the young ladies, shall we?" she said, gesturing to the Hogwarts Club. It was the first time I got a good look at which girls liked Quidditch enough to settle for a stupid club.

"Bailey Clarke," a dark-haired girl introduced herself. So _this_ was Bill's mystery sister, the one Ryan planned to take to the dance!

"Harley Pensky," Harley said, waving and smiling, mostly at the Beauxbatons Club, who returned the greeting just as kindly. See? Girls get along much better.

Maybe it was because we were all united under the fact that our schools were sexist. But the details didn't matter.

Mikaela Smith, a small fourth-year looking girl, Jenna Dawes, a fifth year Ravenclaw with blonde hair, and Lauren Thompson, an apparent Slytherin, all introduced themselves next. No one else spoke up.

Was that really all the girls there were? Two Gryffindors, a Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin?

Although, looking at the Beauxbaton's Club, it looked like my friends were the only ones there too.

"I'm Claire Girard," Claire said, giving a small smile.

"Lottie O'Connor," Lottie said confidently. I still have no idea why she's here. I'll have to find out. I saw Sirius move out of the corner of my eye, and glanced over to see him cross his arms and give her an inquisitive smile.

"Hi, I'm Meredith Richards," Meredith said, her brownish-orange hair bouncing happily as she did.

"And I'm Kate Laurent," Kate smiled, waving to the Hogwarts girls.

And yet again, no one spoke up.

"Mr. Potter, if you would introduce yourself," McGonagall said tightly.

James shifted his weight, still keeping the steely look on his face.

"James Potter."

McGonagall sighed exasperatedly.

"I suppose that will do, Mr. Potter. Come now! The rest of you! These are our guests!"

"Sirius Black."

"Ryan Campbell."

The rest of the team went on to introduce themselves. I was last.

"Jake Cole," I muttered, not looking at them. A ripple of conversation went through the Beauxbaton's team, however.

_"- didn't know Jake played Quidditch -"_

_"- when did he transfer here?"_

_"- heard a rumor he got spattegroit-"_

"Mr. ..." McGonagall trailed off, looking at a piece of parchment she was holding. "Maynord," she finished. "Care to introduce yourself and your team?"

"Austen Maynord," he said, giving us an arrogant smirk. I saw Lottie and Claire roll their eyes behind his back. A couple of the guys on our team caught it and started laughing quietly.

The rest of the team introduced themselves, but I didn't pay much attention. If I heard their names I would recognize them, and I would feel guilty about smashing their faces in - I mean beating them in the Match.

That's what I meant.

McGonagall sighed and gave up, waving us off. The Beauxbaton's students would be staying in an empty-classroom-turned-dorm-room with three different rooms, enough beds for all of them, and three bathrooms for their convenience. The girls got one room, but there were only four of them so that made sense. Plus, I bet they preferred that since Claire, Lottie, Mer, and Kate lived with each other normally. Another plus, it would make it easier when I infiltrated their room later that night.

* * *

"What's the password?"

"Lottie O'Connor if you don't let me in right this moment I will hex your boobs off."

"Sheesh! Aren't we touchy tonight?"

But she opened the door and I quietly slipped into the room, and when she closed the door behind me I set up soundproof spells.

"LILY!" Kate squealed running over to give me a hug. Meredith followed suit while Lottie and Claire laughed behind them.

"Hey guys!" I laughed, hugging them back. Oh, how it felt wonderful to talk and act like a girl!

"How's Hogwarts?"

"Any cute boys?"

"How about _living_ with any cute boys?"

"You made the starting team, right?"

"Are their beaters better than us?"

"Who was that black-haired guy to the right of you?"

"One at a time!" I commanded, "Kate, Hogwarts is all right. Not much different that Beauxbatons, actually. The food is really english, though. Mer, _yes_ Holy Merlin yes there are plenty of cute boys. Living with them? They're total pigs. I haven't seen one of them make their bed yet. Yes, I made the starting team, but only because James gave me personal training all week. They're different. They go for more strength and speed than aim, but it works out all the same. And Lottie, his name is Sirius, why?"

"No reason," she said innocently.

Yeah right, no reason my a-

"So, are you going to get rid of the charms on your face or what? It's kinda starting to freak me out," Meredith said, her gaze flicking to different parts of my face which I suppose looked different.

"Oh! Yeah, I will. I figured we were having girl's night, so I packed a bag with my guy's uniform for tomorrow morning. One sec, lemme get rid of the sideburns," I said in a rush. I went into the bathroom and erased all of the charms from my face, magically lengthened my hair, and put my eyes back to their normal green.

"Better?" I asked, stepping out of the bathroom in a tank top and pajama shorts.

"Much!" Kate laughed.

We all sat in a circle and it was only when Lottie started to french braid my hair into pigtails that I remembered to ask her:

"What the hell are you doing here? You can't play Quidditch," I reminded her.

Lottie rolled her eyes. "Like I was going to miss this game. No, when I got wind that the Club would be accompanying the boy's to Hogwarts, I figured it was a perfect opportunity for me to join the Club."

"And since we were the only members, it was a unanimous yes on her application," Kate added, smiling mischievously. I laughed and bumped her with my shoulder.

"So, I heard Sean saying something about a carnival in our honor?" Claire asked, nibbling on a licorice wand (provided by moi).

"Oh, that," I laughed. "It technically isn't in your honor. It's to raise money so we can get new brooms. You guys were cut so the boy's team could get funded for new brooms, right?"

"Er... no," Claire said, frowning. "In case you hadn't noticed, Lily, but there are only four - well, three - of us who still wanted to play Quidditch. Why would they keep the girl's teams up if we don't even have enough players to fill one, much less four?"

Oh shit.

I never thought of it that way.

"Wait. So... the whole team doesn't have Nimbus 1500's?"

"No, that's ridiculous! They're incredibly expensive, why would the school buy them brooms?" Kate asked.

"Oh God," I muttered, slamming my forehead into my palm repeatedly.

"What happened?"

"I guess this was just a rumor then. But first Jake sends me a letter and then McGonagall talks to James, Sirius, and Remus, and both said that Beauxbaton's cut the girl's team to supply the Boy's team with new brooms so they would beat us!"

A short silence followed, until Lottie spoke up.

"Who's McGonagall?"

"Lottie," I said exasperatedly.

"What?" she retorted, "I just wanted to know."

"She's the deputy headmistress, head of Gryffindor house."

"Gryffindor? You named your house?"

"No, they all come with names. Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff."

"Okay, what the _hell_ is a Hufflepuff?" Kate asked, looking alarmed.

"I don't know, they were just the last names of the founders - but that doesn't matter now!" I added hastily, seeing Claire open her mouth, most likely about to ask about the founders, " _What_ is going on with this brooms thing?"

"Well," Meredith began, "it looks like there was a rumor going around that Beauxbaton's is unfairly supplying their team with broomsticks, and you guys heard it. So this carnival is to raise money so your team can also get new broomsticks?"

"Looks like it, yeah," I said, "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?" Claire asked, "It's not as if any of us care! The only people who care about this game are the boys, just because they're stupid and way over competitive. Except for you, Austen deserves to be beaten therefore you have a rock-solid reason," she added hastily, seeing the look on my face.

"Thanks," I replied dryly.

"Look, let's just enjoy this carnival thing. What'll it have?" Lottie asked.

"Oh, you know, regular carnival stuff. Food, rides, games. Sirius pulled for a kissing booth, though," I rolled my eyes. The girls laughed.

"This boy sounds... interesting," Kate giggled.

"That's one way to describe him," I agreed.

"So the carnival is next weekend at your Hogsmeade place? Where we were last time?" Claire asked.

"Yep! James said there's going to be a path marking the way, though, since it isn't directly in the village."

"Sounds cool," Meredith said, "But who's James, you've mentioned him more than once now."

I sighed, "Oh, he's the captain of my team."

"Ooh, sounds like there's more there. Lilykins, do you fancy James, the captain of the Hogwarts Quidditch Team?" Lottie asked, winking.

"Wha - ? NO!" I exclaimed. "I do _not_ like James Potter. I'm helping him get a girlfriend!"

"Is it you?"

" _No_."

"Well there's obviously a story. C'mon, Lily, tell us your dashing adventure with James!" Meredith prodded.

I sighed, "It's kind of long. And boring."

"Knowing you, it's probably neither. Story time!" Kate said, and lay down on her stomach, propping her elbows on her pillow.

I rolled my eyes.

"All right, so when I first got on the train, I met this girl named Bridget Perrotta..."


	9. Jake at the Carnival

** Chapter 9: Jake at The Carnival **

"OI! I've been sent down to make sure you find your way to the Great Hall for breakfast."

"What'd he say?"

"What _time_ is it?"

"Do any of you see my glasses?"

"Claire, how did you end up on top of me?"

"I'm pretty sure I had a dream where I was racing a dragon over water. I may have sleep walked a bit."

"Oh. Of course. Totally normal."

"Is Lily awake?"

"I am now," I said, my voice muffled due to the fact that my face was mostly pressed to my pillow.

"Hello? Anyone in there?" We could hear knocks on the door.

"Uhh, yeah, hold on!" Meredith called out, sitting up and running a hand through her hair. "One sec!"

I sat up, looking around the room. The sun was slanting through the window, sending long shadows across the floor and walls. Meredith was pulling on a robe over her pajamas, telling us to shush up. Claire was, in fact, sprawled across Lottie, who looked like she was about to hit her. Lottie had never been a morning person. And Kate was shuffling around the room, looking for her glasses that she wore before putting in her contacts. She was kind of blind.

"Here, Kate, they're by me," I said, holding them up for her. She took them gratefully.

"Guys, be quiet," Meredith said again, and made her way to the opened it just enough so that she was visible, but not the mess behind her. We may have stayed up a little late, eating candy and talking. And playing Exploding Snap. And Guess the Bean with Bertie Bott's. It was a little messy in here.

"Yes?" she asked, whoever was standing outside.

"Oh, Merlin, sorry, I thought you guys were up." I recognized the voice.

_"It's James!_ " I hissed to Kate, whose eyes widened.

And I was Lily! CRAP!

I scurried around the room, not knowing what to do. If I stayed as Lily, it would look weird that another girl suddenly showed up. If I did the charms and became Jake, THAT would lead to some awkward questions, as well!

Kate stealthily walked up to Meredith, and from behind the door (where James couldn't see her, thank Merlin), she hissed quietly, "It's the James guy! Make him leave!"

"Uhh.." Meredith said, her gaze snapping back to James's, "it's all right. What did you need again?"

From where I was hiding (I'd joined Kate behind the door) I could see James rub his neck awkwardly in the small sliver between the doorjamb and the wall. His hair looked damp, like he'd just taken a shower.

"McGonagall wanted the Team to make sure you guys from Beauxbaton's knew where to go. We all go to breakfast in the Great Hall, and then she'll talk to you about going to lessons. So um.. do you need help finding your way to breakfast or something?" His neck was a dark red.

"Nope! No, we're all good, we'll find our way down!" Meredith said too cheerfully. Kate rolled her eyes.

"Right. Well. Yeah. Okay, I guess. See you girls down there," he said, backing up quickly and leaving the area, quickly joined by Sirius, who I guess had been in charge of talking to the blokes.

Meredith closed the door behind him and looked at me.

"You need to be a boy again."

"Thanks, I didn't notice," I said dryly. I probably should've come up with a better plan beforehand. I ran to the bathroom and changed into the Hogwarts uniform, undid the enchantment to my hair, and redid the charms on my face. A few minutes later, and I was ready to go, as were Lottie, Claire, Meredith, and Kate, all in their powder blue Beauxbatons robes.

"Let's go then."

I led them down to the Great Hall after making sure none of the boys were coming out of their room a few meters away. Upon arriving at the Great Hall, most everyone glanced up at us, but since they were just the girls and not the actual hated team, no one took a particular interest in us.

"Lils, where do we sit?" Lottie came up behind me and whispered in my ear.

"Umm..." I said, looking around. There was no special "Beauxbaton's Students here!" sign, so I guess they could sit wherever. "Just follow me, okay?"

I led them to the Marauder's usual spot, one I had recently taken to eating at too. Peter automatically scoot down the bench when he saw me coming, but did a double take to see the four girls following behind.

"Hey, Jake," Remus greeted kindly. He cast a curious look to the girls.

"Um, they don't have anywhere to sit," I said awkwardly, casting Lottie a look, who nodded in agreement.

"Well, of course they can sit with us!" Sirius said grandly, also sliding down. Lottie and Kate took the seats next to him.

"Hey, Jake, where were you this morning?" James asked, looking up from his toast after me, Claire, and Meredith took the seats between Remus and Peter.

"This morning?" I asked, stalling. "Uh... the... library," I said. "Yep. I'm tutoring some people in our Charms class, and they wanted to meet that morning," I lied quickly.

"You're that good at Charms?" Peter asked, awed.

"Um. Yeah, I suppose," I said, looking away. Admittedly, it was my best and favorite subject. But I don't actually tutor people. I'm not a very patient teacher. It's a ginger thing.

"Wow," Remus said, looking impressed. He looked like he was about to ask something, but was cut off by a certain shaggy-haired Marauder.

"So, ladies," Sirius said loudly, attracting the attention of everyone at our table, "What positions do you play?"

* * *

"So, you know those french girls?"

"Huh?"

I looked up from my - I mean Jake's - Potion's textbook to see Bridget chopping up some sort of root with a look of nonchalance on her face.

"Those girls," she gestured with her hand not holding the knife to Lottie, Claire, Meredith, and Kate, who were sitting at the front of the room, making their own potions.

Since they'd be here for a few weeks, they were having classes with us. All of the girls were in seventh year, so they just followed me around with the Gryffindors, and the boys went by age to whatever house they wanted.

"Oh! Yeah. 'Cause, I used to go to their school and all. We just have a mutual friend, really," I said nervously, keeping my head low.

"Oh," Bridget said, falling silent for a few seconds. "But weren't you on the Quidditch Team, shouldn't you know the boys better?"

"Er... yeah. But - um - I never got along that well with the Team. That's - uh - one of the reasons I transferred," I lied quickly, "And those girls' friend is my neighbor, so I saw them a bunch over the summer," half lie. I did see them a bunch. But Jake didn't, other than when he was hiding from his mom in my bedroom.

"Oh. Well, that's nice," she said, cutting her root into careful, even pieces.

I cleared my throat, "So... are you going to that Carnival tomorrow?"

Bridget brightened up, "Yep! You bet, it'll be so much fun! But my friend, Jen, from Ravenclaw? She roped me into working the kissing booth for a half hour," she rolled her eyes, but I caught a sly side-glance she sent me.

Gulp.

"That sucks," I said, averting my gaze, "make sure you bring a lot gum," I joke lamely.

Bridget laughed, though. "Oh, I will," she said. "Are you going?" she added.

"Yeah. Quidditch team, remember? So I have to take my turn manning one of the food stalls or rides or something," I said, shrugging. The girls promised to keep me company, anyways, so I wasn't too miffed about it.

"That sounds fun."

"Yep."

Silence.

"Oh yeah! Snape," I said to him.

Immediately he turned around, making it quite obvious that he had been listening in, eyebrows raised.

"I think I may have found your tarantula."

* * *

"Isn't this _fun_?" Claire said happily.

"I'm having the time of my life," I said sarcastically, lazily flicking my wand so that another bag of candy filled itself and set itself on the counter to attract customers. We were both sitting in one of the food booths, thankfully the candy/sweets one. Bill pulled the shortest straw, and got the first shift with the fried foods, and was stuck in the grease-stinking booth for an hour. I felt bad for him and gave him a free bag of candy when he came around.

"You've only got a couple more minutes left in here, then you're free, right?" Claire asked.

"Yeah, I've done this and the Ferris Wheel," I answered, standing up to take the sickles from a third year buying a bag of licorice wands. "And the girls are out roaming?"

"Yeah," Claire said too quickly. I looked at her, eyes slightly narrowed.

"You're planning something."

"What? No we're not!"

"Yes you are, I can see it in your face."

"Lily," Claire said too loudly, and I wildly looked around to make sure no one was nearby enough to be listening, "Nothing's going on, I just want to get out of this stupid booth."

"Well," I said irritably, "you didn't have to come!"

"Lils," Claire said in a softer tone, "what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong!"

"Liar."

"I'm not the one who's lying."

"There's _nothing_ going on, we're just trying to have a good time, all right?"

I gave her a skeptical look.

"Seriously, Lily, you're just being paranoid."

"Fine. Sorry," I muttered, rearranging the cellophane bags.

"It's okay, you don't have to apologize," Claire said gently, coming up behind me. After a few more people bought some candy, Joe came into the booth through the back door and said my shift was done.

"See ya around," I told him, leaving with Claire.

"So, what are we going to do?" she asked me, walking beside me as we made our way through the field.

James wasn't lying. This field was pretty big. We had about a dozen food stalls, two for Rosmerta (who was supplying drinks), a Ferris Wheel (something that amused the students who weren't used to Muggle things), a large slide for the younger students, a fortune teller, Sirius's kissing booths, the Suit of Armor Quidditch Match (surprisingly a big hit), one of those rides where it's basically a ton of swings connected to that spinney top thing, a few carnival games, and a small roller coaster. Since all the rides and games usually operated on electricity, Dumbledore had magically altered them so they didn't need to, making it easier to keep the Carnival close to school.

I found James and Sirius by the Ferris Wheel.

"Hey guys," I said, leading Claire up to them.

"Hey Jake. Claire," James nodded. Since the girls ate breakfast with us they'd gotten comfortable enough to at least use their first names.

"Hello, boys," Claire said kindly, giving a small wave. "I'm going to go find Lottie, all right?" she added to me, then went off into the crowd.

"So, how's it going?" I asked them.

"Fantastic!" Sirius exclaimed. " _Everyone_ in the school showed up, and most of the Hogsmeade villagers. I saw Dumbledore on the roller coaster," he added, well, seriously.

"Really?" I laughed, raising my eyebrows.

"Yeah, it was weird," Sirius said, looking out to the crowd again. "Have you done any of the rides yet?"

"I did the Ferris Wheel a couple of times with Lottie," I said. For some reason, Sirius grinned widely. "What?"

"Sirius had a bit of a run-in with your friend at the Kissing Booth," James said, rolling his eyes.

"Wait," I help both my hands up, " _Lottie_ went to the kissing booth while you were on your shift?"

"Well-"

"No," James interrupted Sirius, "I was with him. She was walking towards the butterbeer station, and Sirius was on his way to replace Diggory. He intercepts her and says, 'Hey! I'm about to start my shift at the Kissing Booth!' And she says, 'All right, have fun' and starts walking again, but Sirius grabs her shoulders and says 'Don't you want to come see me?' and she give him this look. She does it a lot, where she kinda crinkles her nose, but not in a mean way, you know?"

"Oh yeah, it just means she's confused or thinks your mad," I supplied, smiling in spite of myself.

"Right," James said, now holding onto Sirius, who was physically trying to interrupt him with his own version of events, "So anyways, she answers him 'Uh, no, not really. But I'm sure you'll have fun' and tries to walk away again, but _again_ Sirius interrupts her and you'll never guess what he said."

"What did he say?"

"'I need someone to practice on, you know!' and then he just snogs her in the middle of the crowd."

" _What?_ " I gasp, unable to keep the smile off my face. I broke into laughter. "She didn't let him get away with it, did she?"

"No," Sirius shrugged, then turned his head so I could see his other cheek. It was still faintly pink, and looked like a hand print, "She slapped me. But damn, even when she was fighting she was a good snog!"

Me and James were laughing hysterically now, I had my hand on his shoulder to keep myself balanced.

"Sirius, you're an idiot," I told him.

"No, I am a man of action."

"You don't just snog girls in the middle of a carnival!"

"She asked me to."

"No, she didn't, mate. In fact, I'm pretty sure she said she _didn't_ want to when you invited her to the booth."

"It's all in the eyes, Prongsie. I could tell, her eyes were begging me to."

"Oh, Merlin, Sirius," I rolled my eyes. Me and Jame continued chuckling while Sirius watched the crowd, a faint smile on his face.

Bridget walked past us, and turned around to walk backwards, her eyes trained on me.

"Hey!" She said, "it's my turn at the Kissing Booth. Come visit me?" She winked and turned back around.

James groaned. "I _love_ carnivals." And began walking after her. Sirius shook his head.

"You're no better," I nudged him.

"Yeah, but at least I have a shot with O'Connor," Sirius said, following James with his eyes.

"He has a shot with Bridget," I said, half to myself. He did. And they were going to get together and he would be unavailable, and I could finally stop thinking about him. Which I do because I want them to get together already. Yep. That's why.

"Do you really think so?" Sirius asked me, looking me right in the eye.

I hesitated. "You never know."

"I've watched him lust over her for the past four years," Sirius said. "She's had the option of dating him since First Year, really."

I found that eerily similar to what I told James when he first asked me to help him out.

"James is determined, I think it'll work out," I said with conviction. Sirius shrugged.

"Jake!"

I turned my head to see Kate and Lottie standing there. Sirius smiled at Lottie, who rolled her eyes.

"We need to talk to you, _right now_ ," Lottie said, ignoring Sirius.

"It's an emergency," Kate added.

"What is it?" I asked, alarmed.

"Come with us!" Lottie took a hold of my wrist and pulled me in the crowd. I glanced behind me and caught one last look at Sirius, before someone stepped in front of me, blocking my view.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"You'll see," Kate answered vaguely.

They pulled me along until we were literally at the back end of the Carnival, behind the roller coaster, completely out of view from everyone in the field.

"Er... are you here to rape me?" I asked nervously. Kate made an impatient noise.

" _No_ ," she said, "but hold still."

"What? Why - "

She pointed her wand at me, and suddenly my hair grew about a foot and a half, tumbling over my shoulders in orange waves. Eyes wide, my hand went up to my face and felt my nose and jaw, all softer and less square.

"Why am I me?" I asked, keeping my voice level.

"So you can have fun," I heard Claire's voice behind me. She was holding a bag, and Meredith, beside her, was holding a pair of sandals.

" _What_?" I hissed. "I'm supposed to be Jake! Lily isn't even supposed to _be_ here! What if someone from Beauxbatons recognizes me?"

"Lily, relax. There are hundreds of people and students here. There are about twelve Beauxbatons boys. The chances of you running into them are less than zero," Meredith said with conviction.

"And you don't have to be Jake _all_ the time, right?" Lottie asked. She thrust my clothes at me, a cute yellow sundress that she knew I would adore.

"But.." I trailed off, not thinking of any more arguments.

"You can thank us later, just get changed."


	10. Lily at the Carnival

** Chapter 10: Lily at the Carnival   
**

After Kate had conjured a partition I could change behind, Lottie ended up doing my makeup, and Claire made sure no one was looking.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Lily Evans, if you ask that one more time I will make you look like a drag queen."

"But.. I'm already a girl-"

"And I'm sure extremely pigmented blue eyeshadow and red hooker lips would look just as lovely on you as it would a guy."

I shut up after that.

"We good to go?" Meredith asked, jumping up from the grass where she had been sitting.

"Yep," I said nervously. We marched out from behind the roller coaster and joined the line at the back.

I kept glancing around nervously.

"Would you stop that?" Lottie snapped, "You're making me nervous, always looking around like that."

"I can't help it!" I hissed back. "What if someone recognizes me?"

"Who could possibly recognize you?"

"I don't know, someone from the Qudditch Team! They spend enough time around me to know my face."

"What about them?" she said, pointing to Zeke and Darren, the reserve keeper and chaser. They were walking past us. Darren looked over. He smiled and waved at us and went on talking to Zeke. My eyes widened. "See?" Lottie said, "Didn't notice a thing."

"Oh.." I trailed off.

After that I calmed down a bit, and the line started moving a little faster. We were almost to the front when everything just turned to shit.

"Hey girls!" I heard the voice behind me.

It couldn't be him.

He didn't talk to my friends when I wasn't there.

But I was there.

So apparently he did.

"Oh... Hey Austen," Claire said, shifting herself so the she was standing in front of me, blocking me from his view.

"What's up? Enjoying the carnival?" He asked. I had turned away, so I couldn't see his face, but I could almost feel his eyes on me.

"Yep," Meredith, joining Claire. Oh Merlin I loved them. I quietly tried to make my way through the people, but they stubbornly refused to let me pass them.

"No cutting the line!" One boy said harshly.

Oh for the love of -

"Who've you got there?" Austen asked. I turned enough to see his face, looking directly at mine, and I panicked.

" _Cover me!_ " I hissed to Lottie, and then took off running.

"Oh - my - _god!_ Austen!" Lottie squealed, "Have you been _working out_? Your arms look so _big_ and muscular - can I feel them?"

I glanced behind me to see Lottie standing directly in Austen's way, grabbing his bicep firmly in her hands. The girls got the hint and crowded around him too, squealing and giggling.

Again: Oh Merlin, I fucking loved them.

I wasn't looking where I was going and slammed into a solid figure, sending us both toppling.

"God, I'm so sorry!" I rushed out, jumping to my feet and helping them up. When he was stood, adjusting his round glasses, I realized it was James.

"Oh," I said softly. I could feel myself turning red.

"No biggie," he said easily, looking somewhat distracted. He glanced at me, then did a double take and looked harder. "Hey, do I know you?"

"Uhhh - _no_!" I laughed and then started to run again.

I looked behind me and saw him shrug, then started walking again. I lost sight of the roller coaster line, and figured I was safe. I slowed to a walk, being careful to look where I was going this time.

"Hey, can I get a butterbeer?" I asked Rosmerta at her stand.

"Sure thing, sweetie," she said, and ducked behind the counter. I glanced around while she pulled out the bottle, and I handed over some coins.

I walked around the field, sipping my drink, keeping an eye out for anyone else who might recognize me.

I saw Sirius, Ryan, Joe, and Remus all playing Quidditch against the Armor. Remus was playing Keeper, and he was all right. Not amazing, but he was fast and had good reflexes. I watched for a couple more minutes until I noticed a large group of the Beauxbaton's Team waiting to play, and I made my leave from there.

It was back at the Candy stand where I saw Lottie and Claire.

"What happened?" I asked, grabbing their arms.

"He got away," Lottie reported, "he saw you, made some excuse, and made a dash for it. Kate and Meredith tried to go after him but they lost him in the crowd near the Ferris Wheel.

I swore underneath my breath.

"Look, it's not that bad," Claire said positively. "If we just see him again we can avoid him, it's not like he can just come up to you and -"

"Lily!"

"You were saying?" I asked through gritted teeth. Claire's eyes widened as she looked behind me, her mouth forming a perfect 'o'.

I spun around, already glaring at Austen. Lottie and Claire backed up.

"Hey!" he said cheerfully, grabbing my hand. I gave him a look of disgust and yanked it back. It didn't faze him.

"Where've you been? I've been writing letters to your house, your girls have said that you've been sick, what are you doing here?"

"That's none of your business," I snapped, folding my arms over my chest.

"Hey, Lils, c'mon, talk to me," he said, and rested a hand on my shoulder.

"I really don't have anything to say to you, we're broken up, remember?" I said, turning around and starting to walk away. He pulled me back, looking slightly annoyed.

"Okay, no one breaks up over a stupid Quidditch issue. Just be a girl for five bloody seconds?" he said, narrowing his eyes.

"Oh? Just for five seconds?" I said, planting one hand on my hip. I raised my other and started counting up to five, putting one finger up every second, "First-off-it's-not-a-stupid-Quidditch-issue-and-you're-an-ass. Oh! Look at that!" I said, waving my hand, "time's up!"

I smacked him across the cheek and continued on, dragging Lottie and Claire with me. Lottie looked like someone just told her she won the lottery.

"That was _awesome_!" she said, skipping, "the look on his face was _priceless_!"

"Better than Sirius's?" I asked slyly.

"Oh, well... yeah, actually. I kinda feel bad for that. He looked like a kicked puppy," Lottie said, twisting her mouth to the side in thought. But then she added as an afterthought, "But he shouldn't have mouth raped me like that."

I burst out laughing. "Mouth rape?"

"Well... yeah. What else am I supposed to call it?"

"How about 'he kissed you'?" Claire suggested, rolling her eyes.

"But I didn't want him to. So it was mouth rape."

"You so did! Your cheeks were as red as cherries when I saw you after it!"

"That is so not true!"

"Yes it is! Lily, she's lying," Claire accused, shaking my arm.

"Play nicely," I said lamely. Claire rolled her eyes, but Lottie wasn't paying attention anymore. She was determinedly leading us to the boy's kissing booth, and using the back door like she was taking a shift.

The booth was set up almost like a tent. In the food stalls, they had a counter in front, and it was much bigger, but the Kissing Booths just had two chairs, and no counter or any separation. You handed your ticket to the person collecting them, kissed the girl (or guy for the girl's booth), and went on your merry way.

Right now Bridget was lip locked to a fourth year Hufflepuff, with curly brown hair and too many freckles. He was obviously milking it for all it was worth, and soon Bridget looked pained. Behind the curly haired guy another one, only taller, was waiting, but I didn't pay much attention, because Lottie strolled up to Bridget and tapped her on her shoulder.

"Hey, we'll take over if you want," she said kindly.

"Thank _God_ ," Bridget said almost immediately, turning away from the boy and wiping her mouth. She then saw all three of us. "Oh, um.. which one of you is replacing me?"

Claire and Lottie exchanged look, Lottie quirked her eyebrows in a way I didn't understand, but Claire obviously did because she turned to Bridget.

"I can't. I have mono," she said gravely.

"Oh," Bridget said sympathetically, "that's horrible. Aren't you not supposed to be around people?"

"Uhh... it's fairly mild," Claire said like she knew what she was talking about.

Bridget frowned. "Um. Sure. All right then. What about y-"

"I gave it to her," Lottie said. She wrapped her arm around Claire's shoulders, "She's my girlfriend."

Of course they would. I gave her an angry glare, but she smiled cheekily at me.

"So, I guess your my replacement then?" Bridget said, giving me an apologetic smile, but then it turned inquisitive. "Wow, you look familiar. Do I know you?"

'No one will recognize you' my ass, Lottie.

"Nope!" I said too cheerfully.

"Are you girls finished in there?" came an impatient voice.

Claire looked like she was about to go and give him a piece of her mind, but Bridget said, "Looks like you're on, then." And she gave me a little nudge, and I walked to the front of the tent.

"Um. Hi," I said, awkwardly. He was already sitting on his stool, and as soon as I sat down he attacked me.

Yeah.

I totally understand why Bridget was thankful that I came an rescued her.

Even though I didn't even know what was going on until it was too late.

I could barely handle the first three guys. The one after the first guy decided it would be fantastic to stick his tongue down my throat. One was a tiny first year, who I just pecked. He still looked happy though, which kinda made me smile. Then I realized he'd just gotten his (probably) first kiss by a seventh year cross dresser.

Poor kid.

"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me. This is great - just. Great." I heard the next guy say while I drank some water, trying to get the weird taste out of my mouth. I looked up and saw James standing there, and I almost choked.

CLAIRE AND LOTTIE I WILL _KILL_ YOU.

They knew he was in line the whole time! That was what that... look between them was.

Wait a second.

What was so wrong with me that he was so upset?

"No, it's not you!" He suddenly amended, making me reel back, thinking he'd read my mind. But then I realized my face was twisted in offense. "It's just that - I mean, I was waiting for the other girl - and she's... you know."

"Um.. I do?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Well, you're not bad! You're... you know, too."

"I... am? Thanks... I guess." I laughed. James kept stammering.

"Yeah, um.. so. I guess I should... uh, kiss you now?" He said, stuffing his hands in his pocket, then taking them out again to ruffle his hair and sat down. "I mean, I gave that girl my ticket, and I paid..."

"Oh, well, it's the least I can do," I said, smiling slightly.

He laughed and said, "Well, uh, here I go," and leaned forward.

After determining he was going left, I went right, and our lips met in the middle.

It was much nicer than the other three, let me tell you. He was hesitant at first, his hands simply clasped in front of him. Both of us had our eyes open but mine soon fluttered closed. One of his hands was now on my waist, the other on the back of my neck, keeping my close. He pulled away, though, much to my disappointment.

"I uh.. think that that's one ticket's worth," he murmured.

"No, I think you can get a little more," I told him, and pulled him closer. He didn't argue anymore, and my hands were roaming through his hair. The kiss grew stronger, and I wondered if I'd be able to pull away until someone was doing that for me.

"Lily, what the hell is this?"

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?

I opened my eyes, breathing deeply, to see Austen pushing my chair away, his eyes locked on James, who looked slightly ruffled, his hair standing more on end than usual. Oops, my bad.

"Excuse me, asshole," Austen said. "You're snogging my girlfriend."

" _Ex_ -girlfriend," I told him firmly, standing beside James.

James gave me a look. "Woah, you're Lily? You're Jake's friend?"

"And you're about to die," Austen interrupted.

James laughed, a short, harsh sound. "What are you going to do, drown me in your tears?" he mocked, pouting.

"I did not cry at that game, there was something in my eye," he said, stepping closer so that his forehead was almost touching James's.

"Okay, okay, seriously guys. Let's just.. step away. All right? Tone it down," I said, pushing Austen away.

"She's right," James said, surprising me slightly, "we can settle this in a couple of weeks, on the Quidditch Pitch, right Maynord?"

"Okay, James," Austen said, smiling sarcastically. But he turned away anyways, and I exchanged a look with James, who shrugged.

"Or!" Austen said, not turning around. "We can settle this right now!"

He turned, his fist flying, and nailed James in the nose. James fell back a bit but immediately charged forward, grabbing Austen's stomach and tackling him to the ground. The tent went down, and they continued wrestling.

"Austen! Stop!" I commanded, running after them. The guys in line for the kissing booth reeled back quickly, avoiding the two. Austen was sitting on James's chest, trying to punch his face but James was blocking him with his arm. I ran forward and tackled Austen, making him fall sideways, off of James.

"Lily, get off me!" He commanded and pushed me off, going for James again. Just as he was about to take another swing we heard.

" _STOP_!"

We all turned, and saw Professor McGonagall, looking as if she could breathe fire, marching forward. Her mouth was simply a paper-thin line.

"How _dare_ you show such acts of immaturity!" she yelled. "Detention! Three weeks! For _both_ of you," she added menacingly, looking at Austen. "Now _leave!_ " When they, ducking their heads, quickly left the scene, she turned to me. "I don't know _who_ you are, but you are to leave as well. Go!" I quickly followed them, running into Lottie, thank god, who was holding my bag with Jake's clothes.

"Thank you," I whispered, but she followed me and we were soon joined by the other three. In the distance I could hear, "What are you all standing around for! Enjoy the carnival!"

Only McGonagall could make that sound like a threat.


	11. Discussions on Stuff

** Chapter 11: Discussions on Stuff   
**

After our... ahem, _spectacle_ at the Carnival, from what Sirius told me, it pretty much deflated after that. People hit the food stands in a final splurge, then left, walking up to the castle with wild rumors and contorted version of events that led up to the fight.

Apparently, I was James's long lost girlfriend who was stranded in Bulgaria for nine months with nothing but a canteen and a flower. Austen, having found me wandering the Bulgarian country side during the summer, took pity on me and brought me to Hogwarts, where I was feeding off of grass and bugs before seeing James and running up and planting one on him. Enraged, (for he had obviously fallen in love with the disgusting bug-eating wanderer) Austen took his anger out on James's face.

But I'm pretty sure Sirius had been lying when he told me that version.

Either he was or rumors really did work that way.

I was pulling for the former.

Anyways, after making sure James and Austen were dejectedly walking back up to the castle like kicked puppies, Lottie and girls pulled me into the Three Broomsticks (which was technically closed since Rosmerta was down at the fair), magically locked the doors, and handed me my clothes so I could change.

Newly reformed as Jake, we parted ways when we passed the corridor containing their room. I left to wander the school, trying to know my way around a little better, just in case.

I'll admit it: I didn't want to see James. Ever since he started spending more one-on-one time with me, this feeling in my stomach wouldn't go away whenever he was near. Or even mentioned. Like a single butterfly was readjusting it's position and fluttering its wings a little bit. I started to noticed more things about him, like he had a light sprinkling of freckles along the left side of his jaw that you wouldn't notice unless he had been in the sun for two hours with you. That his eyes went from simply a hazel to a more greenish-gold when he looked into the sun. That he ruffling his hair meant he was either nervous or confused. That he took Quidditch almost as seriously as his studies, and was determined to win the House Cup in his final year _and_ hand Beauxbaton's ass to them on a silver platter.

And then there's the fact that he was 'lusting over' Bridget.

And I was helping him.

It definitely put me in a weird situation.

I found myself in the Gryffindor Common Room, not really knowing how I got there. It seemed that just by thinking about James made me automatically walk to where he most likely was.

Disturbing.

Finally mustering up whatever Gryffindor courage I possessed, I walked up the Dormitory stairs. I put on a sickeningly cheerful face and swung open the door, praying to every spiritual being out there that all of the Marauders would be in the room as well.

"What's up, guys!"

It was just James.

Just my luck.

The curtains around his bed were half closed, and I couldn't see him from here.

"Hey man, where'd you disappear to today? I saw you with Sirius and then you just vanished for the rest of the day," I heard his voice say.

"Oh, that," I said hesitantly, "Um... I got dared to eat a bag full of candy then go on the swinging ride. I got sick, it wasn't pretty," I invented hastily.

James stepped out from behind the curtain. His face was paler than usual, his nose was crooked and the obvious traces of a bloody nose were still visible on his upper lip.

Oh, yeah, and there was also a _freaking tampon half-hanging out of his nose._

"Oh my god - _is_ _that a-_?"

"What? Oh! Damn, yeah! Uh-" James spluttered, quickly pulling on the string and discarded the quite literally bloody tampon. "I borrowed one of your \- um - yeah. But you're right, those things really do work!"

"Yeah," I said weakly, "I've been told."

"Right."

"So uh, what happened to you?" I asked nonchalantly, trying not to flinch. I didn't realize Austen had broken his nose.

"I uh, got into a fight at the carnival," James said, rubbing the back of his neck. He had a wet tissue in his hand and dabbed it at his nose.

I rolled my eyes, "That won't do anything."

I waved my hands, beckoning him to come closer. James stepped forward hesitantly, and recoiled when I pulled out my wand.

"For God's sake, I'm not going to kill you," I said exasperatedly. I pointed my wand at his nose. " _Episkey!_ "

I heard a dull _crack_ and James groaned, clutching his nose and doubling over. A minute passed and he stood up, rubbing his nose, which was now straight and particularly not-broken.

"Thanks," he muttered, checking himself in the bathroom mirror.

"So... how'd that happen?" I asked, sitting on my bed.

James took his time shuffling back over to his bed. He finally sat down and ruffled his hair, straightened his glasses, and then finally said, "Well, Austen Maynord kinda caught me and Lily s-snogging at the kissing booth," he said, wincing, and looking at me like it was okay.

"Wait, you... you _kissed_ her?" I said, raising my eyebrows, trying not to smile at the memory.

"Yeah, Jake, I hope that's okay. I mean... I think we raised enough money," he ended feebly.

"Okay? Why does it have to be okay with me?" I asked, genuinely confused.

"Well, you always talk about her, I figured you had a thing for her or something..." he trailed off.

Oh.

I had a crush on myself.

Of course.

If by 'myself' I meant 'James', sure!

I can't believe I just admitted to myself I liked him.

And then I realized I was sitting there, silent, after he just accused me of fancying the pants off of myself.

"No I don't!" I said quickly. "I mean, she's great, but we've been friends for years. It's not like that."

"Oh," he said, lying back, resting his head on his pillow. Was it me or did he look relieved?

"Why, do _you_ like her?" I asked in what I personally thought was a subtle way. Knowing me, though it probably wasn't.

"I don't know..." James said. He was looking up at the ceiling, not meeting my gaze. "I don't really know her, you know? She's pretty, one hell of a snog, and if she can get along with you for however long you've known her for, she has to be a little insane."

"I'm taking that as an insult to both me and her," I warned him.

"Sorry."

"It's all right."

"But there's still Bridget..." he trailed off.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

"Have you talked to Bridget? Ever?"

"Yes," he defended himself hotly.

"When?"

"She told me she was working the kissing booth."

No, she told _me_.

"Anything else?"

James was silent.

"Look, you seem to be going through a seriously confusing emotional roller coaster," I said gently. James gave me a flat look. "It's the only way to describe your situation, shut up."

"All right, sure. A seriously confusing emotional roller coaster."

"You just need to do a little soul searching, and decide which girl is right for you."

And that girl will have long, wavy red hair and green eyes, and plays a mean game of Quidditch.

But that could've been either of them, really.

"How the hell am I supposed to decide?"

"Well..." I said, "speaking as a _completely_ objective third party outside with absolutely no personal interest in the matter," I cleared my throat. "I don't think that you and Bridget are really... meant for one another. But - but you and Lily. I've known her for forever. You two together would be... magical," I ended, smiling to myself.

"Look, I don't know," James said, rubbing his temple with two fingers.

"What does your _heart_ tell you?"

" _What?_ " James asked, looking alarmed and sitting up.

"Uh... I mean, which one would you rather see _naked_?" I amended quickly.

"Okay, yeah, why?" James suddenly exclaimed, standing up and pacing. "Why do you always have to talk about girls like that? Like - in such graphic terms?"

"I -" I broke off, unsure. How the hell do guys talk about girls with other guys? Change the subject, dammit! "You're... really a sensitive guy, aren't you?"

"No," he protested hotly, taking something out of his pocket. Upon closer inspection I saw an old snitch, considerably less shiny than the ones they used during the games. He started to rub the ridges near the wings. "I just... they're not just bodies. They have minds. Relationships shouldn't be all about the physical stuff." He said the last part in a mumble, as though it was dishonorable to say something like that about a girl.

Boys.

"No, you're right," I said, sitting Indian-style on my bed. "That's really... decent of you."

"Yeah?" he said, glancing over at me. "Don't get me wrong," he added quickly, "the physical stuff, snogging, that's great."

I rolled my eyes. "...but?" I prompted him.

"Well... when I'm in a relationship, I want to able to talk to her."

"About what?"

"I don't know... stuff."

"What kinds of stuff?"

"Everything," James said, leaning against his bed post. "Anything. Stuff I can't talk to anyone else about, you know?"

"Like... this kind of stuff?" I asked gently.

James smiled slightly. "Yeah. But what I just told you?" he said, taking a few steps to stand over me, pointing at me in what I could only describe as threatening. "Is for your ears only. You don't tell _anyone_ I talk like this, or I'll... kick your ass." He poked me just below my throat.

I ignored the slight shiver of pleasure going up my spine. "Don't worry, mate. I got your back."

* * *

A few days passed since me and James had our discussion after the carnival. It was now Wednesday, and a week from the Saturday was the Big Game, as people started calling it. The Quidditch Season had not officially started, so Gryffindor and Beauxbatons split the Pitch for practicing time.

That day at lunch, James and I had both got to the table early.

"So... Jake," James started, not looking up from his sandwich. "Have you been in contact with Lily lately?"

"I guess."

"'Cause I was thinking... maybe I could ask her out to go with me to our next Hogsmeade trip?"

"Really? You mean it? _I'd love to_ ," I added the final part in a whisper.

"What?"

"Uhh, I mean, yeah. I'll owl her, tell her to come."

James looked relieved. "Thanks, man."

"No problem."

"So where is she exactly? I think Kate said she was sick, but she showed up the other day..."

I took my time chewing. "Well.. she was sick, before. But she made a full recovery. And the Quidditch Team and Club are supposed to be up here, for the game. But - er - since she's so pissed at Austen and everything, she's staying with her grandparents. In London. And they're sort of... home schooling her," I lied - horribly - hoping he wouldn't ask too many questions.

"This is just to avoid one guy?"

"It's a girl thing, I guess."

James shrugged, but Sirius then joined us with Remus and Peter following close behind. The girls soon followed, and we spent the lunch period talking lightheartedly. I was slightly distracted, however. Why, you ask? _James Freakin' Potter just said he was going to ask me out!_

"O'Connor!" Sirius yelled to Lottie, even though she was only a few seats away.

"My name is _Lottie_."

"Lottie, then," he amended, and I snorted into my pumpkin juice when he got that goofy grin on his face. Claire and Kate exchanged an amused glance. "Who are you rooting for for the Big Game?"

Ahh, now that was a question. It was hard to determine _which_ side Kate, Claire, Meredith, and Lottie were on. On one hand, school spirit and everything kept them from being _obviously_ supportive of the Hogwarts team. On the other, one of their best friends (me) had been humiliated by the team captain, so out of loyalty they all hated him as well. Plus, they ate meals with me and half of the Gryffindor Team every day. Everyone was pretty confused by their attitude, but it was definitely fun to watch.

"You, of course," Lottie said unthinkingly, popping a chip into her mouth. A few people raised their eyebrows, and Sirius's grin widened. It wasn't a huge secret what went on at the Carnival between the two of them. Realizing what she just said, Lottie turned bright red. "I meant _Hogwarts_! Honestly, all of you," she said defensively. Claire openly laughed.

"It's okay, _Lottie_ , there's no need to deny the obvious sexual tension between us," Sirius waggled his eyebrows. "My kiss gets them every time," he added to James, who rolled his eyes at me.

"Mouth rape," Lottie automatically snapped. Remus and James dissolved into fits of laughter. Claire, Kate, Meredith, and I, having already heard term for the event, merely chuckled into our food while Sirius raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"It isn't rape if you want it, love."

"I swear to God, I will hit you again."

"All right, love birds, let's get to class," Remus said, hoisting Sirius up from his stool ("But Moony, I was making a move...").

Lottie rubbed her temples.

"Oh, admit it, you like his attention," Claire said mischievously when Sirius was out of ear shot.

"I do not!" Lottie protested hotly.

"If you don't mind my saying, your excessively red cheeks beg to differ," James spoke up. When Lottie glared at him, he winked, then followed Remus and Sirius, Peter hot on his heels.

We laughed at Lottie's uncharacteristic silence, and continued to tease her all the way out of the Great Hall. However, when we turned the corner, heading towards the dungeon staircase for Potions, James was leaning against a pillar, Bridget standing in front of him.

"So what do you say...?" she was saying softly, looking up at him through her eyelashes.

"Y-yeah, that sounds brilliant," James was saying, badly hiding his excitement.

Bridget glanced over at me, then quickly back to James. She took a step forward, not even six inches away from him now.

"Great," she said, placing a hand on his chest. Yet again her eyes found mine, as though making sure I was watching. "I'll see you this weekend. We'll meet at the _Three Broomsticks_?"

"You got it," James said, smiled widely. Bridget went on her toes and kissed him on the cheek, then turned towards the stairs where she was quickly joined by one of her friends.

"Woah," Kate said. "I thought you said that chick wasn't interested in him?"

"She isn't..." I trailed off. She wasn't. Right? "I'll meet you guys in there, all right?"

After saying good bye, the girls went off without me and I quickly caught up with James.

"Jake! Merlin!" James said, turning around. His eyes were bright with excitement. "Did you see that? She just comes up to me and asks me out! Your advice and everything worked!" He took my hands and ended up leading me in a waltz around the hallways.

"James - James!" I said, loudly, attempting to snap him out of it. He stopped twirling but was still humming with glee. "What the hell? Half an hour ago you told me you were going to ask out Lily!"

"Well," he sang, "what would you do if the hottest girl in school came up to you and asked you out? The girl you've been after for four years? Hmm?"

My eyes widened. "So - what? Just forget about Lily?"

"If me and Bridget weren't right for each other, this wouldn't have happened, right?"

I stammered, but he just ruffled my hair and swaggered towards Potions, humming along the way.

* * *

"I need to talk to you."

Bridget looked up from where she was supposedly reading her textbook (her eyes weren't moving across the page). "Moi? Whatever for?"

"I think you know. What was that, out there?" I demanded, sitting down. I kept my voice low so James wouldn't hear me.

"Oh, wow, I forgot to say!" Bridget said, taking both of my hands, "Thank you _so much_ for telling me to reconsider James. I mean, he looked _fine_ today, and yesterday, I saw him in his Quidditch Robes? Wow!" she fanned herself with her hand.

I found myself getting more annoyed every second she talked. "You know, he's not a piece of _meat_ , Bridget. He's a man. With feelings," I added. So stay the hell away from _my_ man with feelings!

I didn't just think that.

"And I'm a _woman_ , with feelings," Bridget said easily, turning back to our Potion. "And my feelings are telling me to go out with James. However," she added quickly, "if you must, you could join us? Make a double date. I'm sure Ulyssa is available to date you this weekend!" She added, raising her voice.

Across the room, Ulyssa looked up. Her eyes widened in shock and happiness, then said, "I'm so there it's insane!"

Greeeaaat.

"Fine," I said to Bridget. "I'll come. But only because I don't want him to get hurt."

I didn't know if she was just toying with him to make me jealous, or if she really did like him. I was certain it was the former, but I had to go along, just to be sure.

"He won't," Bridget said quickly, turning her body so she faced me fully. "I promise. I'm glad you're coming."

Somehow I got the feeling that that was the only honest thing she said to me.


	12. Cheesy Dates

** Chapter 12: Cheesy Dates **

"Jake."

Startled, I jumped in the squashy sofa I was dozing off in.

"Wah-?" I looked around, seeing Remus standing before me, Peter poking his head out from behind. "What?"

"Can you come with us?" Remus asked, a weird look on his face.

I shrugged, "Sure."

It was the day after I somehow landed myself a date with Ulyssa. Bridget was the one to organize such a ludicrous event, when she asked James out. To make me jealous, obviously. But James, being the star-crossed lover he was, fell for it, hook, line, and sinker. Mere minutes after he told me he was going to ask _me_ out, might I add. Or Lily, I mean. But I am Lily, so dammit, he told me he was going to ask me out! Then Bridget comes and ruins it all because she has a crush on a cross-dressing girl! If she was confused about her sexuality, she should have talked to someone, not ask out a boy.

UGH!

Anyways, Remus and Peter led me up the boy's staircase, straight to our dormitory. James and Sirius were sitting on the floor, in the middle of all the beds, their heads ducked together, looking over some piece of ratty parchment. At the sound of the door closing, James looked up, his eyes brightening at the sight of me.

"Glad you're here! We've been meaning to ask you about this for a couple days now."

Oh my God.

They were about to induct me into the Marauders.

I mean, not to sound cocky or anything, but I feel as though it had taken long enough. I helped Peter with whatever girl trouble was plaguing him, I got James a date (though not with the girl who was obviously perfect for him), Sirius was obviously chasing after Lottie, and Remus... well, I'm sure I can eventually help him.

Meeting me was the best thing that ever happened to these guys, dammit!

I would get a cool nickname! I have no idea what 'Moony' 'Wormtail' 'Padfoot' and 'Prongs' had to do with anything, but I'm sure I'd be in on the secret in a few short minutes. I wonder what my nickname would be.

Interrupting my thoughts, however, Remus sat down and took the bit of parchment."Your good at charms, right?"

What did this have to do with me getting a cool new nickname? Was there some sort of test?

"Uh, yeah, I guess."

The four exchanged a look.

"Well.. we need your help," James started. "You have to swear you won't tell anyone what we're doing, though, agreed?"

"Agreed," I answered immediately.

James picked up the parchment and showed it to me. I gasped, seeing the intricate detail going into it... it was a map of Hogwarts!

I somehow doubted I was being made a Marauder at this point.

"Wow," I breathed. The piece of parchment wasn't too big, but it somehow held all of Hogwarts easily in it's small frame. If I ever thought of any room or place, say the Gryffindor Common Room, it showed it to me, going so far as plotting where each couch or end table was. My next thought was 'Great Hall', and there it was. It was a truly wonderful bit of magic. "How'd you guys make this?"

"Remus drew most of the floor plans, James added in the littler details, Peter labeled everything, and I added the secrecy charm," Sirius said proudly.

"Secrecy charm?" I questioned.

Remus cleared his throat and tapped the Map in my hand, saying "Mischief Managed!" The map went blank, and I was holding nothing more extraordinary than a bit of dull, frayed-around-the-edges parchment. He tapped it again, and said, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good!" And it was back.

"Wow," I repeated. "What do you need me for? This looks like a perfect map to me."

"Ah, but we want it to do a little more, you see," James said, his eyes twinkling.

"We want it to show the people inside Hogwarts as well," Remus explained when he saw my confused expression.

"Wait.. so you mean you want it to show all the students and teachers, ghosts, Mrs. Norris, _everything_?"

"Exactly!" Peter spoke up for the first time, giving an excited little jump.

"And make it so it shows who the person _really_ is. It'd go past Polyjuice Potion, charms... Invisibility Cloaks," Sirius said, nudging James, but I hardly noticed. My face went a little pale. A Map that showed you who someone really was, past all disguises?

"Nope! Can't help you," I said too quickly. "I've never heard of anything like that. Sorry."

The charm was actually relatively simple. But I'd be damned if I told them about it.

"Damn," James said, frowning. "I guess it's back to the library."

Sirius groaned and flopped onto his back.

"I _hate_ the library!"

"Tough," Remus said kicking him in the side lightly.

"Well, if we're done here, I'm going to go to dinner," I said, pushing myself up from the ground.

The four followed me, and I made a silent pact with myself. I would _not_ let them find that spell.

* * *

"Wakey-wakey-little-Jakey!"

I've never hated a sentence more than this one. Especially on Saturday morning, mere hours before I had to sit through an entire date with Ulyssa, while James and Bridget would sit across from us.

"What do you want?" I asked, keeping my face away from James, having grown accustomed to just not letting people see me in the mornings before I have the chance to renew the charms.

"It's eleven o'clock, lazybones! Get up, get a shower, make yourself sexy because Merlin knows that bed head isn't going to pass."

I sighed. "Be less gay, I dare you."

"I could always crawl in this bed and cuddle with you."

Sigh, if only.

"All right, I'm up," I snap instead. James, smirking and triumphant, leaves me in peace.

I claim the bathroom, renew the charms, and take a quick shower. When I emerge, James is gone, probably heading down the Great Hall, or going straight to Hogsmeade.

Eurgh.

Hogsmeade.

The place that included the _Three Broomsticks,_ where the previously mentioned date would take place.

Eurgh.

I pulled on jeans and a t-shirt, since everyone wore muggle clothes to Hogsmeade for some reason. I walked down the many flights of stairs to the Great Hall, finding the girls eating, but the Marauders were absent. Strange.

"Hey Jake," Claire said. They'd finally gotten into the habit of not calling me Lily, even if it was unlikely anyone was listening in.

"'Lo," I said glumly, pulling my plate towards me and piling it with roast beef sandwiches I had really no intent on eating.

"Ouch, why the long face?" Lottie inquired, looking at me closely.

"I don't want to go today," I whimpered pathetically, looking at each of them with imploring eyes.

They, however, did not fall for it.

"Oh, buck up," Kate said, waving her hand impatiently. "If what you said was true, this girl doesn't even _like_ him. One date won't do anything, you'll see."

Bah, she was right! I'm an idiot.

"You should get going, didn't you agree to meet them at twelve?" Meredith asked, checking her watch. I looked at her wrist and jumped up.

"I have to go!"

"Be a good boy, now!"

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

I rolled my eyes, but didn't turn around to find out who said that.

* * *

I found Ulyssa waiting for me at the entrance to the school, wearing a nice outfit - a cute skirt with a white camisole and blue cardigan. She did something with her hair so it looked curly, and she honestly looked pretty.

"Hello there," I say, smiling lightly.

Ulyssa blushed, but didn't say anything. I wondered why she agreed to this. I don't think I've ever personally said anything to her. Oh well.

We walked down to Hogsmeade in silence. I (very gentleman-like, might I add) held the door open for her when we walked into the _Three Broomsticks_ just as it turned to twelve o'clock. Towards the back, James and Bridget were already sitting in a booth, but didn't seem to be conversing much. James was playing with the napkin dispenser, and as we got into earshot I heard him say uncertainly, "So... do you like.. cheese?"

Bridget looked up from her fingernails and gave him an odd look, but didn't have time to answer because she spotted me and Ulyssa.

"Oh good, you're here!"

James looked relieved too. I vaguely wondered how long they'd been sitting there awkwardly.

"Hey guys," I said pleasantly, letting Ulyssa slide in before me.

James mouthed something to me when Ulyssa and Bridget said hello to each other. Something like 'drowning' or 'dying' or something like that. I gave him a confused look but he waved me off.

"Right. So," I said, deciding to get the ball rolling. The sooner this thing ended the happier I'll be. "What's - uh - everyone up to today?"

Bridget and Ulyssa chatted about a new dress shop opening towards the back end of Hogsmeade.

Then Ulyssa suddenly exclaims "Oh! Have you been to Madame Puddifut's this year? Have you _seen_ the new decorations?" and then Bridget asks where she got her shoes.

They kept going.

And going.

Occasionally I would add in my two cents, but couldn't fully appreciate the conversation since I wasn't supposed to know anything about what color would go with Ulyssa's new shoes, or if Bridget should start being more daring and wear brighter colors.

I glanced at James and we made eye contact. He subtly checked his watch and flashed a three and a zero with his hands. Thirty minutes. These two had been talking for thirty minutes. About shoes.

I sincerely hoped I didn't do that when I went on double dates with Lottie or Claire.

James and I ordered round after round of butterbeer and talked about the Quidditch Game, having nothing else to do. We talked about strategy and who we thought was the weakest link on the Beauxbaton's team. Eventually we get on the topic of stupid things Sirius had done in his lifetime, James mostly leading this conversation.

Bridget let out a loud laugh at something Ulyssa said, and the two girls dissolved into giggles.

I couldn't help it - I rest my chin in my hand out of impatience. Bridget noticed this, and suddenly wraps her arms around James's bicep.

"So anyways, Lyssa," when was this nickname formed? Before or after Madame Puddifut's? "Right before you two got here, I was just telling James how good it was to find a _real_ man at this school." She flashed me a smile, and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

Honestly, if she was looking for a real man in me she may as well just give up now.

James, however, looked confused. "Er.. you were?"

Bridget's smile tightened a bit. "Well I was just _about_ to. Isn't it difficult to find a real man?" She added to Ulyssa.

"So difficult," Ulyssa echoed quietly, leaning in closer to me, while I subtly inched away from her.

Bridget, seemingly not satisfied with my response, kissed James on the cheek, right next to his ear, then along his jaw. He looked alarmed at her sudden interest in him, but reciprocated the action when Bridget didn't stop.

Well.

Wasn't this a lovely sight.

I could feel the butterbeer coming back up and looked away.

That was when I noticed Ulyssa leaning in to do the same.

Dear god, this wasn't some big orgy!

"Well, uh," I said, jumping out of the booth and standing beside it. "This has been.. fun. But I have to go... shave." I said, blinking once, then turning away.

Seeing me go, Bridget untangled herself from James and stood up as well, straightening her top.

"Right," she said, smiling brightly. "I had a lovely time. Let's do it again some time. Bye." And promptly left.

I was going to punch something.

James looked confused, then frustrated.

"Let's - er - go?" I suggested, really wanting to get out of there.

James rolled his eyes but didn't argue.

"Bye Ulyssa," I said, waving. We waved once, but left through the back door. It was nice to see we were so emotionally involved in our relationship. James and I stopped at the bar to pay Rosmerta, then made our way out and into the streets of Hogsmeade.

"Well that was a completely failure," James said, straightening his glasses.

"Really?" I asked, barely keeping the excitement out of my voice.

He scoffed. "Yeah, a little. I mean, she didn't even talk to me!"

"That sucks, mate," I said, but I wasn't even mentally there anymore.

In my mind, I was Lily, and we were holding hands while walking down the Hogsmeade path, as happy as we could possibly be.


	13. Bathrooms, Fights, and the Marauders Map

** Chapter 13: Bathrooms, Fights, and the Marauder's Map   
**

"JAKE!"

Dammit, random person calling me, don't you see I'm in the middle of something right now?

I really wasn't in the middle of anything - other than simply walking beside James towards Honeydukes, where Remus, Sirius, and Peter were waiting to here all about our date. With girls. Our double date. James didn't go on a date with me.

Much to my chagrin.

But hey, at least that meant he wasn't gay.

Anyways, I looked around wildly for the source of the noise, seeing Lottie and Claire waving me over to them frantically.

"See you later, then," James said, patting me on the back once, before joining the rest of the Marauders.

I wheeled around to face Lottie and Claire, who were hurrying towards me. "What?"

"We really need to go," Lottie said, taking my arm.

"As in, right now," Claire supplied.

"What? Why?"

" _Because._ Monica's here. She'll blow your cover."

"But she doesn't know... everything," I said cautiously, wary of all of the people around. Lottie and Claire were leading me straight back to the _Three Broomsticks_ bathroom _,_ which seemed to be our new favorite place.

"Yeah, but if she sees you, she'll come over, and she might even realize you aren't really Jake," Lottie hissed in my ear.

Oh. Well, yes, I suppose that would put us in quite a pickle.

"What? We're just going to hide out in the girl's bathroom while I look like a guy?" I asked.

Claire rolled her eyes. "No, of course not. We're letting you be Lily for a bit."

I paled. "Guys, I really don't think that it's smart for me to be genderbending so often-"

"If you go back out there as Jake, Monica will probably sniff you out and attack," Lottie said dramatically. "If you stay in here as Jake, you'll have to take up semi permanent residence in a stall for the next couple of hours, since this is the girl's bathroom. Or, you can go about Hogsmeade freely, being Lily Evans. And James is still out there..." she trailed off, giving me a look.

Oh, how I hated logic.

"Fine," I grit my teeth. "But I don't even have clothes, how-"

Lottie and Claire both pointed their wands at me, said two different spells at the same time, and suddenly I felt like myself again. I looked in the mirror and saw Lily Evans, and I'd never been less pleased.

"Guys-"

"We didn't do your hair right, you've always been better with Charms. Just finish up in here, we're going to Honeyduke's, all right?" Lottie interrupted, putting her hands on my shoulders.

"Isn't Sirius at Honeyduke's?" Claire asked innocently.

"If he is then it is purely a coincidence," Lottie answered hotly.

"Mh-hmm," Claire caught my eye and winked. I turned around and pretended to inspect my hair in the mirror so Lottie wouldn't see my smile.

"Anyways, we'll meet you there, 'kay?" Lottie said over her shoulder as she and Claire made their way out.

"All right."

I pulled out my wand. Lottie's was right - they didn't do my hair right, I had Jake's bangs, my length, but it was a strange combination of wavy and straight. I fixed it in less than a minute, but still stood before the mirror, just looking at myself.

I'd only been at Hogwarts for a couple of weeks, but I somehow feel like a changed person. Every time I pass a window or mirror I always look, and I always get that strange feeling in my stomach of seeing someone who _isn't_ me looking back. But now, when I'm looking at myself, the person I've seen in mirrors for seventeen years, I feel like... it's not real. Like when you're in a dream, and everything seems right and perfect, but only when you wake up do you notice all of the things missing, or not right.

Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm just used to looking like a guy. I sighed and fluffed my hair, not really remembering why I used to do it all the time, and was just turning towards the door when it swung open.

I instinctively ducked into a stall, but remembered at the last second that I was actually allowed in the bathroom, so relaxed and walked out. But then I saw it was Bridget walking up to one of the sinks.

Seriously? Was she stalking me? Did God have nothing better to do today, so he decided to have fun screwing around with my life? Why was she here?

I avoided eye contact, turning on the sink and washing my hands (well, it looked like I just walked out of a stall), and was about to leave (She didn't notice me!) when she looked up, and recognition crossed her face.

"Hey!" She said, smiling happily, "I know you!"

Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit. She knew I was Jake!

"You're that girl who saved me at the Kissing Booth, last weekend. Remember?"

Oh.

Right.

"Oh! Right!" I exclaimed. "Wow, what a small world. I'm Lily."

"Bridget," she said, shaking my hand. "Nice to meet you."

Mh-hmm.

She turned to the mirror and combed her hair with her fingers.

I cleared my throat. "Not that it's any of my business, but uh, you went out with that James Potter guy?"

Bridget looked surprised. "Wow, yeah. That was only about twenty minutes ago."

"Oh, I just heard these total ditzes talking about it outside of the bar," I said, waving my hand nonchalantly.

"Oh, I guess that makes sense..."

"So... did you kiss him?"

She looked up sharply. "No, only on the cheek. Why?"

I laughed. "Well, just try to postpone it as long as possible, you know?" I said, lowering my voice a little and leaning in closer. "He has this uh..." I cleared my throat, "salivary gland condition?" I don't exactly know what that is, but I went with it. "I kinda felt like I was - like - drowning, you know?"

Bridget's eyes widened. "Oh my god, ew."

"Hah, yeah. But hey, happiness to you both," I said sweetly.

All right, so that was a little bitchy. But she didn't even like him! I think.

"Actually, um.." Bridget said uncomfortably. I thought I heard the door open, but I didn't turn around to check. "I don't actually like James. I only dated him to make this guy in my class, Jake, jealous," she admitted guiltily.

HAH! CALLED IT!

"I just.. I have this _huge_ crush on Jake, he's just so..."

"Oh boy.." I said. On the inside, though, I was doing a celebratory dance. She didn't like him! At all! YAY!

But wait.

She liked Jake.

Me.

But not me.

Jake.

But she doesn't know that Jake is me and Jake is in London, Paris, and just about every other major city in Europe opening for one of the biggest wizard rock bands of the year.

Oh. Shit.

"I know, I know, it's horrible to use a person like that.." she said even more guiltily. "But it's just.. I can't get Jake out of my head. He's so handsome, but not the type of goonish handsome, he's... delicate. Refined, even. And oh my god, his _smile,_ whenever he smiles at me, I just... I can't look away, you know?"

This was kind of an ego boost for me. Delicate and refined? D'aww, shucks.

"He's just so... sweet. And funny. And sensitive. He wrote this song I found, it was _amazing_. I just... I don't know what to do."

Stop leading James on, that's what.

But that sounds insensitive. Which apparently, I am not.

"All right, Bridget. I'm gonna give you some advice," I said.

"Okay," she said, almost physically bracing herself.

"Enough is enough!" I exclaimed, grabbing onto her elbows. "You have spun a _very_ tangled web of lies, here. You just got to - got to tell everyone the truth. Let everything just... fall into place as fate sees fit, all right?" So then James will realize you never liked him and forget all about you.

But I didn't say that.

Bridget widened her eyes and nodded. "You're so right."

Hallelujah!

"The next time I see Jake, I am going to march right up to him and tell him how I feel."

"Oh \- okay," I said, taking a small step back. This wasn't exactly how I was planning on things to go, but whatever, this is good. I can let her down easy, I suppose.

"And then, I'm going to kiss him _so_ passionately that even the people that he _hates_ will feel pleasure."

"What?"

"God, thank you so much, Lily!" Bridget said happily, hugging me tightly.

The door to the bathroom slammed open, and in walked Monica.

"Hello, slags," she said condescendingly.

Oh, this is not good.

"And hello to you, you little... home wrecker!" She exclaimed, gesturing to Bridget.

"Uh, who are you?" Bridget asked, raising an eyebrow.

" _I_ am Jake's girlfriend. I graduated from Beauxbaton's a year ago."

Well, that explained why she keeps popping up all over the place.

" _Ex_ -girlfriend," I supplied.

"Okay, _no_ relationship is over until I say it is!" she exclaimed hysterically.

" _Ooh_ , you were the one he dumped a couple of weeks ago!" Bridget said, smiling sweetly.

"No no no no, he did not _dump_ me. We're just going through a bit of a... rough patch."

"Really? Because I heard he dumped you. Yeah, just a one, huge, humiliating, _dumping._ "

They laughed sarcastically together for about three seconds, than Monica reached out and shoved Bridget roughly, knocking her into the sink. Bridget stood dazed for a second before screaming and running straight at Monica, shoving her to the ground. Monica took hold of Bridget's shoulders and flipped her over, Bridget landing with a _thump_ on the hard floor, I could practically hear the breath knocked out of her.

"ARE YOU _CRAZY!"_ I yelled, running over to them. Monica was attempting to climb on top of Bridget and repeatedly hit her over the head. I pulled out my wand and pointed it at Monica. " _STUPEFY!_ "

Monica immediately went limp and Bridget shoved her off of herself.

"Thanks," she panted, fixing the strap on her shirt.

"No problem."

"What should we do with her?"

"Can't we just leave her?"

"I don't think so. We should tell Rosmerta."

Incredibly casual about the whole thing, me and Bridget calmly walked out of the bathroom and informed Madame Rosmerta that Monica unfortunately ran into the wall and was knocked unconscious. Rosmerta looked suspicious, but when she ducked into the loo to check on Monica, we slipped out.

"Well.. nice meeting you," I said awkwardly.

Bridget smiled. "You too. Thanks for all your advice." She turned and walked away, quickly joining her regular group of friends. I wondered if I would have been friends with them if I came to Hogwarts as Lily.

Shrugging it off, I walked towards _Honeydukes_ , already close enough to see Sirius talking to Lottie, and Lottie finding it difficult to keep the annoyed expression on her face. Or at least, that much was obvious to _me_. She was probably still convincing herself she hated him.

"Hey! Lily!" Claire exclaimed oh-so-subtly. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, just... dropping in," I answered, smiling.

"Hi there," James greeted me. He thrust out his hand. "I don't think we've formally met before. I'm James Potter."

I slipped my hand into his and shook it once. "Lily Evans," I couldn't help but smile.

James grinned as well. "I know, Jake's told me about you. Where is he, anyway?" He asked Claire and Lottie.

"He and Lyssa went off to some alley, I think," Lottie lied easily. Claire nodded in back up.

James crinkled his nose. "Oh. Weird."

"I'm Sirius!" Sirius said, bounding up and pumping my hand up and down. "But I'm sure Lottie's already told _you_ all about _me_."

"Don't hold your breath on that one," Lottie said.

Sirius simply leaned in closer to me and said in a hushed tone, "She's only trying to deny the feelings she's keeping bottled up."

"Oh, of course," I answered, smirking. Sirius rested his arm over Lottie's shoulders. She shrugged him off and fixed him with a glare, but her cheeks were turning the lightest shade of pink.

"I'm Remus Lupin," Remus said, also shaking my hand. It was kind of weird to be introduced to all these people over again, but getting a different first impression than when I was Jake.

"Nice to meet you," I said kindly.

"Why are we all standing around? Off to Zonko's!" Sirius said, leading the way down the street.

"Don't mind him," James said to me, leaning in close so Sirius wouldn't hear. "He's just a little off. Really, we only hang out with him so he doesn't feel so lonely."

"You're such a saint," I said sarcastically, but laughing nonetheless.

"Oh, I know."

We spent about three hours at Hogsmeade, the Marauders showing me, Claire, and Lottie where the best stores were. Finally, towards the end, 'Lily' had to return home. I ducked behind the Post Office, changed my clothes back, changed my face, and prayed that I didn't accidentally mess up any of the charms. Claire and Lottie met back up with Kate and Meredith, and they went off somewhere. James, Sirius, and Remus found Peter at Dervish and Bang's, and they went off to do Marauder stuff. I returned to the castle and decided to use the rest of my Saturday as one giant nap time. I walked up to our room and collapsed on my bed, drifting off into sleep.

* * *

The next few days James worked us harder and harder in practice, taking up more and more time. I now had barely any time to finish homework, sleep, or even attend classes. Apparently the Beauxbaton's team was going just as much, though I didn't know how, really. When James realized that they didn't, in fact, have top-of-the-line racing brooms, it only seemed to spur his drive to win even more. The money from the carnival ended up not being used for the Gryffindor Team in a way to put us to an advantage, since McGonagall (also now aware of the fact that to the rumor was false) thought it could be thought of as cheating. So instead we got new uniforms, and ordered pompoms, banners, buttons, and various other items to increase Gryffindor Spirit on game day.

Wednesday afternoon, I was reading through our Potion's Textbook, writing an essay for Slughorn, when the Marauders burst in.

"We found it!"

I looked up. All four of them were standing at the foot of my bed. James was holding a book from the library and Remus was holding... the Marauder's Map.

SHIT.

I FORGOT ABOUT THAT.

I tried not to let my panic show through.

"Found what?"

A charm to change the ink color... A charm to change the ink color... A charm to change the ink color... A charm to change the ink color...

"A charm to show who is where on the map, of course!" Sirius said excitedly.

"W-wow, that's great!" I exclaimed.

"Isn't it, though?" James said. "This Map will be so handy!"

"So... have you used the charm yet?" I asked.

Remus's face lit up. "Yes! We actually found the spell a few days ago, and just got it to work. We did the Quidditch Pitch, that's it. Just as a test run, and it worked perfectly!"

Shit.

"Can I see the map?"

They handed it over, already opened. My eyes were drawn to the Quidditch Pitch, where I saw Beauxbaton's team flying around. Each person was represented by a tiny drawing of themselves, and a banner above their head that had their name on it. It was actually really good magic.

"Wow," I said softly. "You know what? I feel guilty. I should've known about this spell if it was so easy, and you guys could have had your map started sooner if I did. Why don't I do a little bit of it?"

"It's not your map, you shouldn't be doing all of the work," James protested.

"No, really," I insisted. "I can just do... the groundwork. The people. And you guys can finish up with the names." They looked like they were going to argue, but I cut them off. "I insist guys, really."

"Wow, thanks, Jake!" Sirius said.

"No problem."

They dispersed, going to their respective beds and starting on their homework. I folded the map, stowing it into my bag, where I intended it to stay until I left.

Mwahahahahahahaha!

* * *

Later that night, I headed down to the Quidditch Pitch early for a last minute practice James scheduled when he knew Beauxbatons was done for the day. I sat in the Locker Room, already changed, looking at the Map, staring at my dot.

It showed 'Lily Evans', looking like me, like I was supposed to. Like I did for Quidditch back at Beauxbatons, with my hair in a high pony-tail-braid. The picture-me was holding a piece of paper, sitting on the same bench I was, and made every move I did. The Marauder's were really ingenious. Just the Quidditch Pitch, to this level of detail, must have taken them the whole two days since they found the spell. I heard footsteps coming, and stuffed the map into my bag hastily.

"Hey!" Ryan came in, greeting me. "Ready to practice?"

"You bet," I answered.

When the whole team was here, James took us up to the sky and we started practicing. Michael and I were working on a chaser formation while James helped Darren with his sloth-grip-roll when I saw something out of the corner of my eye, what looked like a dark Hogwarts cloak swishing out of sight, into the Locker Room. I looked down, but I didn't see anything. I shrugged and continued passing with Michael, deciding it was nothing.


	14. Everything Goes Down When I'm Not There

** Chapter 14: Everything Goes Down When I'm Not There **

_Severus Snape_

I hate that no-good, rotten, Quidditch playing, "I write songs, I'm so sensitive and in touch with my feelings!", metrosexual, girl-stealing ginger, Jake Cole.

I have waited _five years -_ FIVE! - for Bridget to finally notice me. I knew I was in love with her since second year, when she was the only one who would be my partner in Potions. It was the reason I started studying extra hard for that class, just to impress her, get her to notice me. We spent the year in a comfortable silence. I knew our love was growing.

But, in later years, Bridget grew in popularity. She had a tight group of friends, and wasn't in many of my classes once we could pick out electives. It was like a Romeo and Juliet situation. Her social party would frown upon her being with me, and the people in Slytherin hated all Gryffindors regardless of their... well, anything. So we didn't speak for years.

Then, a miracle.

Sixth year. N.E.W.T level potions. Gryffindor and Slytherin. There were fifteen of us. Those stupid Marauders, Merlin knows how _they_ managed to pass an O.W.L, and Bridget along with two of her friends. Then there was me and five other Slytherins, but they hardly matter. What mattered is that me and Bridget could be together in the most innocent yet passionate way: where we first officially met. Nothing was more perfect. Even better: that oaf, James Potter, also had his eye on Bridget, and I won.

Luck was in my favor. I drew out Bridget's name (it had nothing to do with the summoning charm I performed under my desk) and we reunited with Potions.

Of course, neither of us could express our longing for one another out loud, so we pretended to be nothing more than partners in a class.

But I knew.

She used the "My grades in this class are slipping, will you help me?" tactic. Gladly, I did. We spent many nights in the library. But I think she was still cautious of others, so whenever I scoot my chair closer to hers, she would move away. It ended up being smart, you never knew who was lingering behind a bookshelf.

Finally, we reached seventh year. The year where we were top dogs. No one gets teased as a seventh year. All you have to worry about is the exams at the end of the year, and we're free. Me and Bridget were free to express our love. It was perfect.

Then, disaster.

Our first day seeing each other again: The train. She's in a compartment with some weirdo ginger. Red hair, badly-fitted (probably hand-me-down) robes, and a stupid complexion. He must've been a Weasley. At first I thought it had been an act of pity. He was the first transfer in years, and Bridget is the kindest girl at Hogwarts. But when I extended an invitation to freedom (or a compartment with me and my friends) she declined!

At first I was upset, but then I realized: DUH! She was just being nice, not leaving the Weasley alone.

I only fell in love with her more.

And because of that, I thought I was going to explode from the joy when I found out we had Potions together again. It was a sign! It was truly a sign!

But no.

The Weasley (I learned his name was Jake at this point, but I didn't really care) ruins everything. He picks his partner before mine, so I couldn't get Bridget. I was absolutely outraged. I still am!

He slowly ruins everything Bridget and I have worked up to. One day, and he has her... twirling her hair on her finger. And laughing! Because he was a Gryffindor and socially accepted into 'the Marauders''s group, it was all right for her to show affection to him. I think she got overwhelmed by the fact that she could be natural around her Potion's partner. Obivously, she was confused. I wasn't said partner, but she was being nice. I think the confusion messed with her brain, and now she sees the Weasley as me, and treats him like she should be treating me.

Like some... obsessed, love struck teenager.

But I won't give up! I will destroy the Weasley, like he destroyed my relationship with the girl I love.

That's why I was sneaking into the Locker Room the Gryffindors used for their practices. Everyone was up in the air, no one was paying attention. I couldn't get into their Dormitory, so this was the next best thing.

I stealthily walked in. I don't think anyone noticed me, but I didn't know if any of them would be coming back. I went straight to Jake's bag and started rifling through it. Ink bottles, text books, quills, nothing out of the ordinary. His wand was in there. I could take it, but I didn't think of anything useful that would come of it. I was about to give up my search when I caught sight of a corner of a piece of parchment. It was frayed, but I saw ink on it. Removing it from the bottom of the bag, I stared at it, open mouthed, and shocked.

It was a map of Hogwarts.

And not just any map. It had the actual people, moving around. Well, it had the people on the Quidditch Pitch. It must not be done. I wondered if Jake had made this himself, when I saw the title at the top. "The Marauders Map". So it wasn't his, he was just helping. Or maybe he stole it. Whatever it was, I didn't particularly care. I had no idea how to finish it to use it for myself, and if I took it with me they could easily discover that I had it.

Then I saw it.

A figure, flying on a broomstick. Everyone else looked like little drawings of themselves, with name labels. There was one, a girl flying around, passing the doodled quaffle with 'Michael Turner'. It wasn't Jake Cole, oh no.

It was Lily Evans.

I glanced out the door quickly, but long enough to see that yes, Jake Cole was the one flying.

I had seen Lily Evans before. She was a Beauxbaton's student apparently, and she was part of the fight that happened at the Carnival last weekend.

Now that I think about it, she looked extraordinarily like Jake.

And I'd never seen Jake and Lily together -

Oh, Merlin.

I knew what I was going to do.

And I knew the perfect day to do it.

* * *

_Monica Bessette_

_Monica,_

_Hey, how's life at the Daily Prophet? Office job boring as hell?  
_

_I don't know if Lily or anyone told you, but I haven't been at Hogwarts for the last couple of weeks. My band got a huge gig, and we've been touring over Europe. I was supposed to be back the 12, but I'm coming home a couple days early, I think it'll be Friday night, day after tomorrow._

_I don't actually have to be back until Monday, so I'm staying in the village right next to Hogwarts. What's it called, Hogsmeade? Something like that. Anyways, I'm staying in one of the rooms available at a pub there, and I'm probably moving into my dorm Saturday morning. _So, why don't we meet up somewhere?_ We really need to talk._

_Jake._

I stared at the parchment for a couple of minutes, trying to process.

Jake was... apologizing?

Not that I was surprised in the _least,_ of course.

He knew what he did in the _Three Broomsticks_ was wrong, and I'll happily welcome him back into our relationship.

Jake and I had been dating for three months before I graduated. I expected us to break up when I got the internship at the _Daily Prophet_ Office in Britain, but it turned out he was going to Hogwarts for his seventh year. Although, since there were no girls at Beauxbaton's trying to kill me for snatching up the guitar-playing rebel, I found the whole rather boring.

So, I decided to break up with him when he was able to go to Hogsmeade, on one of my day's off.

But that bastard beat me to it!

_No_ relationship is over until I say it is.

And that blonde slut in the bathroom the other day.. ugh! He's already moved on.

No. Nope. I am _so_ not happy.

But then, I get this letter. He's not even _here_? He's off _touring_? And who the hell was Lily?

Actually, I did know her. She was the one in the bathroom with the blonde, and I vaguely remembered Jake telling me about her. Something about her being his neighbor.

I'd seen Lily around, _and_ Jake.

Lily was supposed to be at Beauxbatons.

But then I hear she's sick and staying home from the few girls I deem worthy to stay in touch with from school.

All the while she keeps popping up in Hogsmeade everywhere! It's driving me mad!

UGH!

Something's going on. I don't know what, but something.

Thursday night, though, I find out.

I'm just in my flat near the _Daily Prophet_ Office, when someone rings the stupid muggle doorbell.

I open it to reveal some weird kid. He had oil-block hair that looked just as greasy, and a long, hooked nose.

My nose immediately scrunched in distaste.

"What?" I asked.

"You're Monica Bessette?"

"Duh."

"Can I come in? I have something you might be interested in hearing."

No way in hell was this slimy git about to stink up my flat.

"Why do you think I'd be interested in anything you'd say?"

He gave me a smile, but it looked more like a grimace. "My name is Severus Snape. It's about your boyfriend, Jake Cole."

My eyebrow arched. "Fine. Come on in."

* * *

_Bridget Perrotta_

I was ready.

I held Lily's advice close to me for the next couple days, wondering when I should tell Jake about my feelings. At first I thought I would just march right up, the next time I saw him. I was tired of just harboring a crush! Lily had awakened a surge of confidence, and I had no idea where it had been hiding before. But then, I saw him at breakfast and I immediately turned to jelly. Ugh! I'm so pathetic.

I hate what just one guy has done to me. After I failed before I even started at breakfast, I decided to play it cool during our classes together. Potions was horrible. It was like _he_ was avoiding _me_. I know he's shy, but he seemed a little more jumpy.

But then, I found my opportunity.

It was Friday, right after my last class of the day. I had a free period, like most of the Gryffindor's in sixth year, except for Remus and my friend Zoe, who both take Arithmancy. After our break was dinner, and then everyone was done for the weekend. Not that anyone really paid attention today anyways. The Game was tomorrow.

I was walking from the Great Hall to the Common Room with Bailey and Harley, who was saying something about Gideon Prewett. I may have tuned her out, since the Marauders and Jake were walking just ahead of us.

"Prongs, when is the Quidditch stuff getting here?" Sirius was asking James. I never understood the fork thing, but the Marauder's had been calling each other weird nicknames since fifth year.

"It's getting delivered to Hogsmeade, we'll have to pick it up sometime after dinner."

Bailey nudged me. "Don't we still have to pick up our dresses?"

Ooh, I forgot about that! Bailey, Harley, Zoe, and I had ordered dresses from a muggle catalog for the dance Sunday night. Bailey had been asked by Ryan (about time, might I add) so she had a date. Zoe was going with someone as well, but she wouldn't tell us. Harley was going stag, since Gideon graduated last year, but they were still going out.

I, on the other hand, had my sights set on a date. I just needed to ask him.

Or for him to ask me. But I got the feeling that Jake wouldn't ask any girl.

"Should we get them now?" I asked her. Bailey immediately looked over to where Ryan was sitting, an empty seat beside him, since he always saved her one. She looked at me with imploring, puppy dog eyes.

I rolled mine. "All right, go sit with Ryan. Me and Harley will get the dresses."

Harley brightened up at the prospect of being able to sneak out of the castle.

I've only snuck out once, but Harley and Zoe had been doing it for a while. They liked Honeyduke's hot chocolate, and oftentimes on weekend nights they'd leave and bring some back, and we'd all get our homework out of the way as a group, sipping the delicious chocolatey drink.

Harley led the way to the only passage we knew about, the one eyed witch statues that leads directly to Honeydukes. Apparently, the Maruader's knew about every one of the secret passageways, but I think that might just be a rumor. They couldn't _possibly_ know about all of the passageways, could they?

Harley led the way down, me following quickly. This was only my second time sneaking out, I'm still a little jumpy.

"You're sure we won't get caught?" I asked her.

I could practically feel her roll her eyes.

"We'll be back before dinner is over, no one will even notice we're gone."

"If you say so."

We walked in silence, broken by the occasional game of "I Spy" Harley insisted on playing to make the time go faster. ("I spy with my little eye - " "It's the dark." "Damn, you're good.") Eventually she gave up and settled on humming a few showtunes.

Finally, we got to the Honeydukes cellar. Both the owner's were upstairs. They had caught Harley and Zoe once in fifth year, but they didn't care so long as they always paid for the drinks.

"Not today, sorry," Harley said to them when they immediately put four cups onto the counter, about to fill them at the sight of us.

We left the shop, making our way towards the Post Office. Hogwarts had something set up in case students bought something from a muggle store and wanted it delivered. I gave the man over the counter my name and we waited a couple of minutes while he rifled around in the back. He returned with a large box and handed it over. We smiled and thanked him, then headed back towards the passage. Harley wanted to just go through the front doors of the school, but it was already getting a little dark and I didn't want any teachers asking questions.

Just as we were crossing the street, I saw Jake coming out of the _Three Broomsticks_. What was he doing here? But suddenly, I didn't care why or how. I was filled to the brim with confidence, with passion. I saw him and I knew what I was going to do. I shoved the parcel into Harley's hands and ran over to him.

"What are you-?" I heard her say, but I blocked her out.

Jake was just turning towards me when I caught him in my arms, wrapping them around his neck.

I kissed him.

And everything was perfect and wonderful.

I pulled after ten seconds and whispered in his ear, "Wake up, I've been waiting for you to open your eyes so that I can tell you that I think I'm ready. I'm ready to freefall into into the unknown." I recited the lyrics I'd accidentally memorized after I read them off the parchment that one day. "I'll see you at the Game tomorrow." And then I raced back to Harley and pulled her into Honeydukes before I could realize what I'd just done.

* * *

_James Potter_

I hate when I have to go down to Hogsmeade alone.

Usually I'll have Peter, Remus, or Sirius with me, but none of us wanted to go down today. So we pulled straws. I have the worst luck at those type of games.

It's not that hard to get into Hogsmeade when you have an Invisibility Cloak. And once the map is done, it'll be easier than ever. I'll have to ask Jake how that's going.

I grabbed my broom from the shed and held it against my side under the cloak. Once I was out of sight of the castle, I stuffed my cloak into my pocket and flew the rest of the way.

We'd received a notice that our package had arrived, but they couldn't spare enough owls to carry all the heavy boxes. That made me laugh. We'd certainly spent a lot of money on Gryffindor Paraphernalia.

I landed just inside the Hogsmeade gates, right in front of the Post Office. I got all the boxes and used a charm Remus had found to levitate them, and keep them within a foot of my broom at all times, until the spell was canceled. I was just about to leave when I saw Bridget and her friend coming towards the Post Office. I wasn't in their line of sight, by the other side of the gate, so they passed me without noticing me. I contemplated talking to Bridget. I hadn't since our fail of a date last weekend, and I was starting to feel bad.

I felt really good, though, like I was finally getting over her. Everything Jake ever said about me never having talked to her really finally sunk in. I was starting to notice how little interest she showed, but it was still a little hard to get over the crush that had been in me for a few years now. And then Lily sorta shows up, and I think about her way too much for my own liking. I was just really confused.

When Bridget and Harley walked out carrying a large box, I decided against it. Maybe this was best. Like a mutual quitting. Finally nodding to myself, I mounted my broom, but her movement caught my eye.

She was running towards a guy coming out of the pub. She threw her arms around him and kissed him, right on the mouth. I stood there, shocked, and when she stood back, I got confused.

Jake.

Jake?

What?

Jake didn't fancy her.

Bridget whispered something in his ear, and then ran back into Honeyduke's with Harley.

Merlin.

Everything made sense!

No wonder Jake was always so against me asking Bridget out!

All along she and him were having some sort of... secret... affair!

All this time! He was probably meeting up with her after classes and they would laugh together, saying how stupid I was.

Lily was probably even in on this! Showing up out of the blue every weekend like that.

Just..

UGH! DAMMIT.

I punched the sign happily proclaiming "The Village of Hogsmeade!" and it bent backwards at about a forty-five degree angle. I swore and sucked on my knuckle that trickled a little bit of blood. I hardly felt it though. The only thing I felt was anger.


	15. In Which Everything Falls to Shit

** Chapter 15: In Which Everything Falls to Shit **

Unaware of the fact that everything that I had been working for for five weeks was slowly crumbling down, I happily ate my dinner with the girls, Remus, Sirius and Peter. James was off getting the new uniforms and all of the junk we bought with the carnival money.

"So, Jake, are you guys ready for the game tomorrow?" Peter asked.

Just the mention sent my stomach into knots, though. The game was TOMORROW. As in IN ABOUT TWELVE HOURS. Well, a little more than that, it was starting at 10:00. BUT STILL.

Part of me was super relieved. Finally! I could stop being a boy!

But then the other part of me wanted to continue being a boy.

No, I haven't grown fond of the sideburns, the hair, or the brown eyes.

But I had grown fond of the friends I'd made. If I had never come here, I never would have met Remus, Peter, Sirius, Ryan, Michael, Darren, little Zeke, or any of the other Quidditch guys. Hell, I'd miss Bridget too! And I'd especially miss James.

If I had never come here, who knows what could have happened? Austen could have sweet-talked me back into our relationship. Lottie, Claire, Meredith, and Kate never would have felt any loyalty to Hogwarts, since the real Jake can't even fly. Lottie probably wouldn't have come with us to the Game against Hogwarts, she never would have met Sirius, we would never get the enjoyment from watching the two of them. I never would have gotten as good as I have at Quidditch.

My whole life could be changed, just from the one choice I made back at the end of summer.

Just thinking about it was kind of scary.

"Jake?"

"Jake, can you hear us?"

"Wow, _Lily!_ spaces out like that all the time! _"_

"Huh?" My head snapped up. Remus, Peter, and the girls were looking at me. Lottie was the one who got my attention. Woops.

"Uhh... yeah, I'm fairly confident in our chances, Pete," I said, playing with my potatoes.

Peter seemed satisfied and went back to his own dinner. Lottie raised an eyebrow at me, but I shrugged her off.

"Are you girls going to paint your faces along with the Hogwarts students?" Remus asked them, a small smile tugging at his lips.

Kate and Meredith grinned. "I can't help but imagine the amount of grief we'll be given when we go back to Beauxbaton's after you lot destroy us, but yeah, I think we will."

"Show some more confidence in your team, we probably won't _kill_ you. I'm betting a measly two hundred point difference, that's all," Sirius winked.

"And that's _with_ your lot catching the snitch," Remus added.

Everyone laughed, but then the girl's looked around to make sure the team wasn't listening. The boys had taken to sitting at one end of the Hufflepuff table, since the badgers were traditionally the most neutral. More than once I'd seen Austen or one of his closer friends watching us. It was a little spooky.

"So, do you boys have dates to the dance yet?" Lottie asked them. Or us, I suppose.

Remus blushed, which was immediately caught by the girls. They squealed and Claire said, "Aww... Remus, come on, let it out!" She reached across the table and poked his arm.

"Well.. I do have a date, but I can't tell you who," he said, ducking his head down but smiling nonetheless. The girl's chided him for a couple more minutes, but he bashfully avoided their questionings. Me, Sirius, and Peter watched in amusement, but I noticed Sirius had one of his looks on his face.

Before any of us had any warning, he stepped onto the table, his left foot dangerously close to the bowl of mashed potatoes, his right near Peter's plate.

"Hogwarts!" He called grandly. "If you could all shut your traps, I would like to say something." Almost immediately, everyone fell silent and looked at him, expectant. McGonagall looked like she was about yell, but she didn't stop him. I wasn't sure, but I'm fairly confident that Dumbledore reached over and patted her hand, practically saying 'Wait, let's see how this turns out'.

"Thank you. Lottie O'Connor," he said, turning to Lottie, who's eyes went as big as saucers. "Would you do me the honor of being my date to the dance after the Game on Sunday?" he bent down onto one knee and took her hand.

Lottie just gaped at him. "You aren't seriously asking _here_?"

Sirius frowned. "Not quite the response I was looking for. All right. If you don't say yes, I will be forced to sing _I Can't Help Falling In Love With You_ by a lovely man named Elvis Presley."

"Sirius-"

" _TAKE... MY... HAND!"_

"Sirius, I-"

" _TAKE MY WHOOOLLLEEEE LIIIIIFEEE TOOOOO!"_

"Sirius, would you stop sing-"

" _FOR I... CAN'T... HELP!"_

"YES!"

" _FALLING IN LOVE... WITH... YOU-_ Oh really? Brilliant!"

Lottie laughed into her hands, successfully covering the blush spreading across her cheeks. "Yes, I'd love too."

Sirius jumped down from the table and wrapped his arms around her waist and quite suddenly they were kissing in the middle of the Great Hall.

However, Lottie broke off and punched his arm.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"I thought you'd never ask me!"

"...Love, you're supposed to say that in a more romantic, starry-eyed way with a dramatic swell of music in the background."

"Don't you _ever_ make me wait that long again!"

Sirius grinned broadly. "I won't." And kissed her again.

A small round of applause went up around the Gryffindor table. The Slytherins had already gone back to their dinner, and Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff just laughed appreciatively at tonight's dinner performance.

Remus, Peter, and I were all wolf whistling, and the Team was joining us.

"Yes, yes! Mr. Black, Miss O'Connor, if you would please return to your seats before I give you _both_ detention," McGonagall called threateningly from the Head Table. More laughter rang out, but everyone went back to dinner. Claire, Kate, and Meredith with squealing and hugging Lottie. Sirius received many pats on the back, and we finished dinner in the lightheartedness of it all.

* * *

"It's nice to see how much you hate Sirius."

"Oh... shut up," Lottie answered lamely, making us all laugh.

All right, all right, so I promised earlier in the week not to go back to Lily. Well, technically, I'm not. I'm just hanging in their room. We've already figured out what to do in almost every scenario from someone coming to deliver a message to a House Elf cleaning, to armed chimpanzees breaking down the magical barrier surrounding Hogwarts. But we didn't practice that one as much, it seemed a tad unnecessary.

"I love that look on your face when you realize 'Ah, shit, I have to admit to something I've been stubbornly refusing to for weeks'," Claire said, eating a handful of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans and grimacing at the mix of flavors.

"That's a bit of a mouthful," Meredith said.

"I like how you all enjoy my embarrassment," Lottie said, resting her chin on her knees but grinning regardless.

"Oh, shut up, you weren't embarrassed. You loved the entire thing from his singing to being able to say 'yes'," Claire smiled impishly.

"And getting to repeat it several times before the numskull heard you," I added.

Lottie smiled and looked at her feet but didn't reply.

"So, Lily," it's not good that I kind of twitched when she said my name, is it? "Was Sirius right? Are you guys going to really crush us tomorrow?"

I chewed my lip nervously. I honestly didn't know the answer to that question. I wanted to say something like "Oh, yeah, definitely. It's in the bag." But I knew that wasn't true. When we're in the middle of a practice, and me and Michael get a perfect pass or James pulls off the Sloth-Grip-Roll perfectly, I honestly do think we're going to win. Just watching the practice and seeing how smoothly the team works together, how in sync we all are. I just have to look at James or Michael to know which way they're going, who they're passing to, how they plan on doing it, or if they plan on making a fake. It's one of the best feelings ever. It's like all seven of us have found perfect balance on top of the tip of a quill.

But when we get reports from Remus or Peter or someone else watching the Beauxbaton's practice, they always say it's the same thing. I once heard Remus telling James that he'd never seen two teams more evenly matched. And that's starting to scare me a bit. And then there are the horrible moments when I think that if we lose, would it be my fault? If I'd never replaced Darren, if I'd never even come to Hogwarts, would they win? Would having a girl on the team being the unneeded weight to tip the scale in favor of Beauxbaton's?

"Lil?" Claire prompted gently.

My head snapped up to her. I plastered a smile on my face. "I guess we'll find out tomorrow, won't we?"

The girls laughed lightly and then resumed the conversation, discussing what colors to wear tomorrow. Lottie and Kate were all for Gryffindor pride, ready to paint their faces, arms, and legs scarlet and gold. But Claire and Meredith wanted to be more subtle about it.

"Remember, we _do_ have to go back after this. If we're hyped up on Hogwarts spirit, no matter what happens tomorrow, a lot of the students will hate us when we go back," Meredith reminded them.

Lottie shrugged. "I think we made the decision when we helped Lily do all of this. No one's being shunned more than she will be."

I cracked a smile. I hadn't really thought of that. Actually, I hadn't really thought of even _going_ back to Beauxbaton's. I'd never really planned that far ahead.

"She'll be shunned if she shows up at the game tomorrow as a walking zombie. It's almost midnight, you need sleep. We all do," Claire said, starting to close up the candy bags. Many protests rose to this.

"Oh, don't be such a Quidditch captain," Lottie rolled her eyes.

"You don't even _want_ to see me when I'm in full captain-mode," Claire smirked mischievously, her eyes flashing. Lottie smiled but Kate, Meredith, and I immediately started cleaning up and the girls got ready for bed.

"Aww, party's over?" Lottie pouted.

"Party's over," Claire confirmed. "But tomorrow will be awesome, and the sooner we get to bed the sooner it'll come."

Lottie hesitated, but, not surprisingly, she eventually gave in and levitated the empty chocolate wrappers into the bin. "If it was anything but a Quidditch Match, I would be holding a rebellion with Kate and Meredith," she said.

"Sure you would."

"I would! We would tie you up and lock you in a closet, and we'd have a dance party with Lily."

"Ah, but it _is_ a Quidditch Match, so we're going to sleep."

"Unfortunately."

It was really quite amusing to watch them. I exchanged an eye roll with Kate, but I smiled and waved while Claire and Lottie went on bickering.

"Are you sure you won't get caught? Your Common Room is on the other side of the castle," Meredith pointed out.

I shrugged. "Even if I do get caught, I'm pretty sure McGonagall would let me off with a warning. She's a fanatic when it comes to Quidditch. I'll be fine."

"All right then. We'll see you tomorrow, find us before breakfast! Me and Kate are helping out with the facepaint," she winked. I laughed and slipped out the door.

I ignited my wand a little. According to Sirius, the paintings were light sleepers. If they were woken up, they make the worst racket and Filch is sure to find you. I kept it low, just enough to see a little in front of me. In silence I walked up the many flights of stairs, pausing at corners in case I heard anything. There was one moment when I almost fell through a trick step, but I caught myself at the last moment, awkwardly landing on the one above it.

Finally, I made it to the Fat Lady. She was snoring softly in her frame. I tapped her shoulder lightly with my wand and she awoke, startled.

"What in Merlin's name are you doing out this time of night?"

" _Lytta_ ," I said the password.

"Oh! I see. You expect to just wake me up in the middle of the night to open a door?" She said furiously.

I rubbed my temple. "Please let me in?"

"I don't know anymore. So many students are so rude, not even a 'hello' or 'thank you'."

"Please, fa-" I cut myself off. Did she like being called fat? "You're right. No one appreciates you. I'll make sure to pass on the message, you deserve more respect." ' _You are an enchanted painting_.' But I didn't say that. Being awake when I'm trying to go to sleep puts me in a foul mood.

"All right, all right. But don't expect me to stay up all night, waiting for you every night," she said irritably. Thankfully, she swung up and allowed me to pass. I made sure to say "Thank you."

The Common was deserted, just the fire place sending shadows across the room. It hit me how tired I was. Early-morning practices had gotten me in the habit of sleeping earlier so I wasn't practically dead on my broomstick the next morning. According to my watch, it was well past my bed time.

Yawning as I went, I crossed the room towards the staircase.

"Jake."

" _S_ hit!"

I spun around at the sudden voice, my hands raising to cover my face. But then I remembered I stayed as Jake with the girls. My eyes adjusted to the dark and I saw James sitting in one of the arm chairs in the corner of the room.

"Merlin, James, what the hell are you doing down here?" I asked, putting one hand on my heart, feeling it beat way too fast.

James didn't say a word.

"Hello? Anyone in there?" I asked, taking a tentative step forward.

"You know... it's crazy," James said, leaning forward in his chair, but looking at the fire, "just how _wrong_ you can be about a person. It's just - just _mental._ "

A little trickle of fear went down my spine. I didn't like how he was saying it. With the shadow from the fire, he looked a little mad.

"You think you know someone. And you think you know who they are. But they turn out to be the exact opposite."

Now he looked at me, right in the eye. His were so full of pain and anger.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, a little scared. _He_ looked scary, which was strange, like seeing a mermaid walk on land or Sirius reading a book. James was supposed to the easy-going one.

"You're going to sit there and pretend to not know what I'm talking about?" He laughed and shook his head, looking at the fire again, and I finally realized... he knew.

He must of. He must know everything. I don't know how, or when he figured it out. Today? Yesterday? Has he known all along?

"I-" I couldn't form the words. "James.." I'd explain everything. I could fix everything. Everything could go back to normal. "Okay. All right. Look, I _wanted_ to tell you James! You just have to know, I - I _love_ Quidditch, and then, over the summer with Austen and Claire and Lottie - I had a point to prove!" The words were tumbling out of my mouth, some of it incoherent. I felt like crying.

This could _not_ be how it all ends! We were supposed to win the game, and then... and then what? Was I going to undo the charms in the middle of Hogwarts's celebrating? What would've happened then? The team would probably hate me. Beauxbaton's could find a way of saying our win was unfair, we had a student from another school playing for us. Would I not tell anyone? But the point was to prove that girl's could play on the Quidditch team. It didn't start that way. At first I just wanted to beat Austen, but when I saw the girl's at Hogwarts who wanted to play but couldn't, my mind changed. This was for them, really, so they get a chance as well. A foreigner shouldn't be the only girl to play on the Hogwarts Gryffindor Quidditch Team. Or any team.

In my desperate attempt to explain all of that in a few seconds, I ended up causing James to look at me like I was insane.

"Wait. So - so you _used_ me, so you'd get better at Quidditch. And then - and then you're going to turn around and stab me in the back?" he asked furiously.

What?

"What?" I asked. "All right, now I really _don't_ know what you're talking about!"

"Don't try to pretend that I didn't just see you with her!" James yelled.

"With who!"

"'With who?' BRIDGET, THAT'S WHO!"

James stood up and shoved my shoulders, unbalancing me and sending me stumbling a little.

"I saw you and her snogging in Hogsmeade!"

"What the hell are you _talking_ about?"

"We were supposed to be friends!"

"We _are_ friends, James! Calm down!"

"No, you don't even know the meaning of the word!"

"All right! Fine! Bridget _never_ fancied you!" I finally screamed over him.

He, apparently, wasn't expecting this.

"What?"

"She was just using you to make me jealous. She fancied me," I said, thankful that he'd stopped yelling. But then I noticed the vein ticking in his jaw. Shit, shit. Distract him! "But Lily..." I said, and he looked at me sharply, still glaring. "She's _crazy_ about you! She has been since that first day you two met!" And snogged.

James paused for a moment, the anger in his eyes fading a bit, but it was back so quickly I thought I'd imagined it. "Oh yeah? I bet that's part of your little plan! Distract me, while you move in next to Bridget while my back is turned!"

"This is so much bigger than just a stupid girl!" I said, walking backwards a bit to make space between us. But James kept stepping closer and I ended up a foot away from the portrait hole.

"I hope you and some stupid girl have an amazing life!" he said. He clenched his jaw and glared at me, but then he turned around and stalked away, up the stairs to the boy's dormitories.

I watched him go, tears starting to brim in my eyes. Impatiently, I swiped them away. In a daze, I opened the portrait hole and ran out, down the corridor, around a corner, down some flight of stairs and eventually I found myself in an unfamiliar stretch of the castle, a long hallway with a window every two feet on the left hand side. Through one, I saw the moon shining above the Quidditch Pitch.

Suddenly, it all became too much: Hogwarts, Beauxbaton's, Quidditch, James... I sunk to the floor, my legs splayed out and my back against the wall, still staring at the Pitch. It was all stupid and useless. Nothing good was coming out of it. I missed being a girl. I missed being able to walk down the hallway with Lottie and Claire and point out a cute guy we might have talked about the night before, or check my make up in the mirror when I told my professor I had really needed to use the loo. I missed braiding my hair for Quidditch, I missed being able to use 'a feminine emergency' to get me out of any class I fancied, I missed painting my nails and wearing hair ties on my wrist and being able to read romance novels and no one really care. I missed wearing nice shoes and even stressing about what I was eating. I missed singing along to the most popular pop-band. I missed everything that made me me from my green eyes to my powder-blue Beauxbaton's quidditch uniform that clashed horribly with my hair.

But then I realized I didn't really miss Beauxbaton's at all. Everything that made me happy was already here: Claire, Lottie, Kate, Meredith, and Quidditch. And James. And Sirius, and Remus and Peter. And Bill and how he teases Ryan over fancying his older sister. And how Darren was so nice about me replacing him. He never held a grudge or became grumpy, he always just himself, smiling like a goofball and talking to Joe. How Michael and I always came up with new passing-formations to show James after he finished instructing the team. How Jack saved fifty-two shots in a row one practice, and when little Zeke took a shot, Remus yelled from the ground 'Jack, your shoe's untied!' and Jack looked down and completely missed the Quaffle, shot by our scrawny reserve keeper. How Remus had a date to the dance, but was too shy to tell us who. How Sirius finally asked Lottie. How my friends are supporting me, even against their own school.

I didn't notice that I was crying until I felt the tear drop off my chin. I wiped my eyes and rested my forehead on my knees, closing my eyes and cutting myself off from the world.

Slowly, I felt myself falling asleep. My last thought before slipping into unconscious was that I really should just sleep in the girls' room so my back wouldn't ache in the morning...


	16. The Big Game, Part 1

**Chapter 16: The Big Game, Part One**

_Jake Cole_

I already could tell I was going to _love_ Hogwarts.

I mean, it's not every where that a gorgeous girl comes up and kisses you, then _recites your own lyrics to you_.

I'll be honest, at first I was a little freaked out. Like, seriously? Stalker. How the hell do you know my song and where I was going to be?

But that look in her eyes, it was like she _knew_ me. Like she'd spent the last month with me! It was... strange. But in a good way!

I kinda wish I knew her name.

Or what she meant when she said "I'll see you at the game tomorrow."

Maybe she thought I was someone else?

No, she had plenty of time to know it was mean when she was running.

My time at Hogwarts was already more exciting than it had ever been at Beauxbatons, I'll tell you that. There, the most exciting had been sneaking out every week. But once we'd done that a couple times, it got boring too.

But this! A Mystery Girl! I was kind of excited for tomorrow, to see what Mystery Girl was talking about with this 'Game'.

I was almost too excited to sleep, but eventually passed out in my small, dingy room in some pub called the _Hog's Head_.

* * *

When I woke up I dressed as fast as I could and gathered my stuff. I needed to move in quickly and find Mystery Girl. Following the instructions of the barman, (which weren't much, just "follow the path.") I went up to the castle, through some courtyard, and into some really big hallway. Ahead of me, to the right, was a huge staircase, and directly across from it was an entryway to a large room. By the noise I could tell most of the students were in there.

And that was when I realized I had _no idea_ where I was supposed to go.

I set my stuff against the wall near the entrance I had come into and looked into the big room with all the students, and saw a whole hell of a lot of red. It was like a giant sea of it. Shirts, hats, scarves, buttons, red and gold sparks were flying, and banners that said 'Gryffindor'. Whatever that was. Their _faces_ were even painted, one side red the other gold. There was a group of girls going up and down the table on the very left, the one most covered in red 'Gryffindor' stuff. One turned around and realized it was Lily's friends. Claire was the one to turn around and pointed me out to the others, and they all hurried over.

"Man, I'm glad to see you-"

"Where have you been?" Lottie interrupted, "The rest of the team already went down, Remus made us go search for you! You better _sprint_ down to the field before James kills you for being this late!"

"Uh.."

"Oh, Merlin, I think she's gone into pre-game shock!" Kate said, worriedly.

She? I am _not_ a girl!

Why were they even here anyways? And who were James and Remus?

"Okay, just take her arms, we gotta get down there. The game is starting in - oh - fifteen minutes. Everyone's getting up to go down to the stands!" Meredith informed them, checking behind her.

Lottie swore and together they took my arms and starting running. My feet started working and I ran with them, still confused.

One second I'm just trying to figure out where to put my trunk, and then I'm being dragged down to some field. For Quidditch? What? I was pretty sure these girls knew me well enough to know that I couldn't even fly. But then I realized that my Hogwarts letter (which I'd read once, when I got it) had said something about a Quidditch Game against Beauxbatons... that explained why the girls were here. But that still didn't explain why my appearance was a big deal.

They let go of my arms and led me down to the Pitch. They knew exactly where they were going, but I probably would have been more at home on Mars. Do they have a magical school on Mars? Actually, with the way my morning was going, I'd say yes. All I needed was a rocket ship and I'd be good.

The girls entered the Pitch and went to an opening, which I realized must've been one of the locker rooms. They threw open the door.

"We found him! He's here!" They called out.

There were about ten guys in the locker room, all dressed in the Gryffindor robes except for one sandy-haired guy. Everyone looked at me and let out cries of relief.

"Shit, where were you?"

"Get your robes on!"

"The game starts in ten minutes!"

"We gotta go. Good luck, boys!" Claire said. The girls ducked out. Lottie stayed a couple extra seconds to give a quick kiss to some bloke with shoulder-length black hair then ran out.

"Jake, get changed."

I looked over to the guy who had spoken. He was taller than me (Merlin, who wasn't?) with the messiest hair I'd ever seen, and round glasses. His hazel eyes practically screamed "HI, I HATE YOU!"

What a charmer.

"Um.. I think there's been a mistake-"

"No, there hasn't," he interrupted, taking a step closer. "Just put your uniform on and try to stay out of my way, you're playing right. Michael's left." He gestured to the guy who I guess was Michael.

"Right."

I got the feeling that this glasses-guy was a major asshole. Unfortunately, though, he kinda scared me, so I put on the uniform.

"Hey, Jake, don't look so nervous! We got this, we've practically mastered every passing formation we've tried in practice!" Michael said, thumping me on the back. He handed me a bundle of red robes, which I guess was my uniform.

All right. So I've apparently been going to this school for the last month, and have become an awesome Quidditch player.

I really hoped this game wasn't important.

* * *

_Lily Evans_

Something wasn't right.

How do I know, you ask?

Well, for one, my back hurt. Painfully so.

Two, my obnoxious alarm wasn't going off with the whole BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP that I'd unfortunately gotten used to. I really meant to change it to something else, I just never got around to it.

And three, the sun streaming onto my face.

All of these three facts were the reason why that when I woke up, this happened:

"SHIT!"

I'm lovely in the mornings.

I jumped up, wide awake, staring in horror at the window in front of me. The Pitch, oh Merlin, the Pitch! It was full of students! The game had started, even from here I could see the blue and red figures flying around!

Had I REALLY slept the night in this hallway?

I immediately started running towards the first staircase I found, taking the stairs two by two and sometimes three by three (I avoided a broken neck at least thirteen times by grabbing onto the railing when I suddenly didn't feel anything beneath my foot.)

When I was almost halfway down a staircase resting on the second floor, it started to shift up slightly.

" _Oh you have_ got _to be kidding me!_ "

I ran faster and jumped off the edge, landing awkwardly onto the ground. A couple paintings snickered. I glared at them but continued my flight.

I started to get a stitch in my side when I just got out of the castle. From here I could hear the cheering from the crowd. I could hear the commentary, but not what they were saying.

I put on a burst of speed, ignoring the protests in my legs and chest.

I got to the Pitch, and the noise was almost defeaning, but it went back down to regular match-level. I guess someone had just scored?

"Thank Merlin, at least they've scored once."

I recognized Lottie's voice coming from the Commentary box. A quick look confirmed it, she and Claire were announcing this match.

"Hogwarts has not been very... on the ball today," Claire added in. "Beauxbatons in possession, leading thirty to ten. Hogwarts was a little shaky in the beginning, I guess Jake Cole's broom was a little twitchy, but they're still in this match! Nice bludger from Campbell of Hogwarts, Durand drops the quaffle, Potter swoops in beneath him, Hogwarts back in possession. Dodges a bludger, passes to Turner, Turner flies off. Passes to Cole who... misses. Beauxbaton's back in possession."

Oh.

My.

Shit.

Jake.

Jake was here.

Jake was flying.

Jake was playing Quidditch.

Jake was playing in MY GAME.

THIS. IS. NOT. HAPPENING.

I stood there, dumbfounded.

Jake was even worse off, though. He wasn't even paying attention. I was surprised he even got up that high, he was at least at the level of everyone else in the air. Every few seconds he would lean forward and his broom would shoot forward, and then he'd pull back quickly, almost toppling over. It became clear that James and Michael had given up, because they were passing between themselves. James would shout something at him, but they were too high I up, I couldn't hear.

I ducked beneath the stands. Underneath you could still see between the wooden planks, but it was kind of weird being able to hear all of the people stomping their feet above my head.

All right, I needed to think this through. How was I going to fix this? Quidditch games didn't have a half time or anything. Usually, someone needed to be injured in order to have a substitution unless the game had already been stopped. How was I going to switch with Jake without anyone noticing?

Just as I was thinking that, though, two people strode onto the field, one holding their wand to their throat, and called out:

"Everyone, if we could have your attention, please! Stop the game, stop the clock, time out, whatever it is!"

That isn't Snape.

Snape wouldn't stop a Quidditch Game.

And that isn't Monica what's-her-face next to him.

Right?

"It seems a couple of students have stopped the game..." I heard Lottie say.

"One of them isn't a student, though," Claire pointed out.

"Snivellus, what the hell are you doing?" I heard James call out.

"We have an announcement to make!" Snape said, his voice magically modified to be much louder.

Madame Hooch blew the whistle, and both teams landed, grumbling mutinously, while she descended upon Monica and Snape.

"Pardon me, but we need to inform everyone of something. Especially the Hogwarts Quidditch Team," Snape said. Madame Hooch looked like she was refusing, but the crowd was already leaning forward, and she finally threw her hands up in the air in defeat.

"It is to my chagrin that I must inform you of something truly shocking. Or, perhaps I'll let Jake Cole tell you himself."

What?

Jake looked just as surprised as everyone else.

"It's okay, the truth will come out eventually," Snape encouraged him, but even from here I could see the smirk on his face.

"Er... sorry I'm not a good Quidditch player?" Jake said uncertainly. I heard a few chuckles from the crowd, but the team mostly exchanged looks and shook their heads.

Snape sighed dramatically. "I guess it's up to me then. Everyone, I'm sad to inform you, but Jake Cole..." Dramatic pause. "...is a girl."

People cried out in disbelief, and in laughter. But then I heard Claire and Lottie speaking.

"All right, all right, that's enough of that. Ref? Shouldn't we just get back to the game?"

They were covering for me. They didn't know that was Jake!

But Jake was the loudest of all. He took Snape's wand and put it to his own throat.

"Um, crowd? I'm not a girl!"

"No, no she is!" Snape took his wand. "She's a girl! To be exact, she's Lily Evans, a student of Beauxbatons, who we believe has been impersonating him all year."

Sirius and James immediately looked at Jake, and from my vantage point I could see James had a look of complete and utter confusion on.

"Okay, yeah. I - am - a - _boy_! I promise!" Jake said, using his own wand.

Monica crossed her arms. "Prove it."

Jake raised his eyebrows in an almost challenging way. "Okay," he said, matching her obnoxious tone.

Without another word he bent over and pulled down the quidditch pants, and then lifted up his robes, a self satisfied smirk plastered on his face.

Immediately the crowd rung out in gasps.

Oh.

Well.

That was more of Jake than I'd ever wanted to see.

"Oi, Jake, put that away!" Lottie called down. Jake shrugged and put his pants back on.

"Mr. Snape," Madame Hooch said dangerously. "Now that we've established that this boy, _is_ in fact a _boy_ , may we please finish our game?"

Snape gulped nervously. I followed his gaze and saw McGonagall storming up to him. It would have been less scary if she was on fire.

Hooch kicked Monica and Snape off the field.

"Sorry for the interruption, ladies and gentlemen. Let's finish the game, shall we?" Claire said while Hooch spoke to the teams. "It looks like we're going to start again with a toss-up between two players in a moment."

Jake's shoulders slumped, and he prepared to mount his broom, but James went over, and muttered something to him. Then he looked over to the Gryffindor bench, and motioned for Darren to come in. He leaped up excitedly and ran onto the field. Jake looked like all his dreams just came true.

"Oh, it looks like Hogwarts has made a substitution. Jake Cole for Darren Samuel."

Madame Hooch shrugged. As soon as Jake stepped across the field line, she blew the whistle, and the players rose into the air, James and a Beauxbatons chaser hovering five feet over, waiting or the toss up.

I stopped paying attention. Jake was walking towards the entrance, I jumped out and dragged him underneath the stands to my hiding place.

"What? Hell, what are you doing, ba- Lily?"

"Hey, what's up?"

He stared at me blankly.

"Why - _what_?"

I sighed impatiently. "Look, I really don't have a lot of time right now. I need the uniform, give it to me!"

"Wait what? What are you doing here? What were they talking about? How are you me?"

"For the past few weeks I've been impersonating you so that I could prove that I could play on the guy's Quidditch Team."

"Oh," Jake said, squinting a little. "Right, yeah. Okay."

"Good, we're all clear then."

"Yeah. Wait, no, what?"

"Okay I don't have time to explain this right now!" I hissed. "What are you doing here and why are you wearing my uniform?"

"I just came up here, looking for that girl who kissed me last night!" Jake said frustratingly.

"What? What girl?"

"Blonde, brown eyes? A bit shorter than me, I think. But Lil," he grabbed my wrist. "She kissed me, and then she recited my own lyrics! This may be the girl of my _dreams_!"

I gasped, my eyes going wide. "Bridget."

"That's her name?" he smiled.

"Oh Merlin, that's who James saw last night!"

"Who's James?"

"No one. It's not important. Just give me my uniform!"

Without really waiting I pulled out my wand and muttered a spell. I was now in my Quidditch robes, he was in the Hogwarts ones. He looked at me and frowned slightly.

"How have you been passing for me for a month? I mean, I know we look alike, but not by that much. Your eyes are green, for Merlin's sake!"

I frowned. "What are you talking about? The charms - oh, right."

I was in too much of a hurry, I had forgotten about the charms! Thank Merlin no one saw me.

I pulled out my wand, pointing to various parts of my face and muttering the incantations.

When I looked at Jake again he had one eyebrow raised and looked a little scared.

"Oh. That's how you were pulling it off."

"They look okay? I don't usually do them without a mirror."

"Yeah. The sideburns are a little uneven, though."

"I really don't care, I need to get back out there."

"All right. Hey, Lily?" I was about to slip out when he grabbed my wrist.

"Yeah?"

"Kick ass." He smiled.

I grinned back and hugged him, then ran out from under the stands, towards the Gryffindor bench.

I just had to figure out how to get back in this game.


	17. The BIg Game, Part 2

** Chapter 17: The Big Game, Part Two **

Getting back into the game turned out to be surprisingly easy.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

First, I had to get back to the bench without anyone really noticing me.

I saw McGonagall ahead of me, giving Snape a piece of her mind (Monica seemed to have run off). I tried to slip by her oh-so-stealthily, but she caught sight of me.

"And _you_ , Mr. Cole! If I _ever_ see you pull a stunt like that again, you will be on the train home!" she warned me. "Now get back to your team before I decide to move your current detention to right this moment."

I didn't need to be told twice. I hurried away, glancing back only once. Snape was glaring daggers at me.

That still bothered me. How did he find out, anyways? Was he spying on me? Had he heard me talking to the girls one day? That could've been it. Maybe he'd seen the map. But no, I kept it safely in my bag. As far as I knew, no one went into my bag, I took it with me everywhere.

I guess it would remain a mystery for now. I sat down next to Zeke, Aaron, and Darren's friend Joe (who was surprisingly friendly for his whole silent and stoic thing going on). They kept glancing over at me, like they were unsure why I was really sitting there.

I watched the game. It was painful. Beauxbatons was leading by a hundred and fifty points. Darren's a great player, but he never really practiced specific plays with James and Michael. And it wasn't just Darren. James kept dropping the quaffle, or messing up plays, or being to slow to avoid bludgers. The team looked like they didn't practice for weeks.

The game went on, and I grew more impatient. I needed to get back in this freakin' game! It's the only reason I even came to this school! If I didn't play, what was the point of me doing all of this anyways?

They'd been playing for a little more than two hours. TWO HOURS! Beauxbatons had possession, one of their chasers was zooming down the field. He dodged a bludger sent by Ryan by an inch, swerving out of the way at the last second. Michael and Darren started flying towards him, covering both of the other chasers, James going straight at him. Durand panicked, throwing the quaffle towards on of his chasers, but Michael intercepted it and started flying towards the Beauxbatons goal. The crowd screamed in approval, but we could hear Lottie's voice above them all.

"Merlin, Durand, were you _trying_ to pass to Turner?"

Even from down here I could see the Beauxbatons player giving Lottie a very rude hand gesture.

Not fifteen seconds later, a well aimed bludger (hit by Sirius) made contact with his back, causing Durand to fall forward, almost falling off his broom completely. Hooch blew the whistle. Durand landed, and Madame Pomfrey was summoned. While he was being looked over, the teams landed, and Hooch talked to Sirius. I think Beauxbatons had been given a penalty shot. But then I realized my chance had come.

"James!" I called. Just saying his name, though, twisted up my stomach. I now knew what he was talking about. While he was wrong in his assumption, I realized that I _had_ been deceiving him. I'd lied to all of them. But I wasn't about to waste a month of work. I'd explain after the game.

"James!" I said again, this time getting up and going over to where they were all gathered, near the edge of the field while Pomfrey made sure Durand was all right to play.

"What?" he said, but not unkindly. It was worse, there was no emotion at all. Like he was seeing through me, like he'd given up on me.

"You need to put me back in the game."

He started to laugh. I think I preferred the stone-faced James.

"I don't think so."

"Please! Just give me one more chance!"

"I gave you chance when I made Darren a reserve, and when you get into the game, you barely know how to fly!"

"Look, I - I know it was bad in the beginning, but I've changed! You've just got to trust me!"

He fixed me with a glare, making it quite obvious that the last thing he trusted was me.

He was opening his mouth to probably chew me out, but Darren stepped up.

"Let him play."

"What?" I said, looking at him.

Darren shrugged. "You're a better player than me. You must've just choked before. If you say you're ready, I believe you."

"Darren, are you sure?" James said, looking down at him.

"You want to win, right? I think Jake is our best chance."

I was about to kiss him. Hug him, sing his praises, ruffle his unruly curly black hair, lift him over my shoulders, _anything_!

I settled on grinning broadly and mouthing "thank you!" over James's shoulder, Darren winking in reply.

James, however, was less than happy.

"Fine," he finally growled. "But if you're playing any less than you have in the practices, you're out. Got it?"

"Yes sir!"

Skipping wouldn't be manly, skipping wouldn't be manly, skipping wouldn't be manly, skipping wouldn't be manly, skipping wouldn't be manly.

* * *

Once Pomfrey decided Durand was fine to play again, the game resumed. As soon as I was on my broom again, anything that happened yesterday was just gone. This was where I _belonged_. I believe the world just looks brighter in the middle of a Quidditch Game.

Unless you were losing.

Which we were.

After Durand put his penalty shot away, another chaser on their team (a really skinny sixth year who's last name was Richard) scored twice in a row. I could hear Jack swear in frustration when he passed me the ball.

I took the quaffle, amazingly calm, and sped down the field. Everything was clicking into place. Michael flew barely ten feet in front of me. He didn't look back, but looked at James, who nodded and started flying about thirty feet above me. Richard flew toward Michael, trying to get him away from me. A beater chipped in and sent a bludger towards him. Michael dove, heading straight for the ground. Richard looked confused, but saw me flying straight at the goal. He switched targets to me, and once he got close enough I took the quaffle and threw it straight up, using all of my strength. James caught it easily, then swerved downward. He was almost in the scoring area, but suddenly threw the quaffle ahead of him. Michael flew out of no where, caught the quaffle, then sent it cleanly through the right hoop, between the outstretched arms of Austen.

"YES!" I cheered. Michael flew around and high-fived me, and even James smiled fleetingly.

"Hogwarts scores! Beauxbatons still in the lead, though, two-hundred-fifty to eighty. But Hogwarts hasn't given up yet!"

It went on in this way. We were suddenly working like a well-oiled machine. Michael scored once more, James three, and I myself two. Sirius and Ryan hit bludgers back and forth, keeping them far away from us, and Beauxbatons only scored three times in the next thirty minutes. Bill was circling the Pitch, the Beauxbatons seeker going the other way. Beauxbatons was still frustratingly in the lead, though, at two-hundred-eighty to one-hundred-forty. James took possession, and flew off.

Michael was in good position for a pass, but a beater flew in front of him and cut him off. I came up and took his place, but James wouldn't look towards me.

"James!" I called out. He glanced at me, but sped up. He dodged a bludger and rolled out of the way of a chaser. I kept up with him, staying in open places. I told him to pass again, but he ignored me again. Michael came back, but James wouldn't pass to him either.

A bludger came out of no where. James rolled and missed it, but he dropped the quaffle. Richard swooped in from below and caught it, a groan coming from almost everyone in the stands. Michael flew in close to James and said something to him, but James shrugged him off. All three of us chased after Richard, but Jack had already blocked his shot. Jack tossed the ball to James, giving him a questioning look, but James offered no explanation to him either.

He flew ahead, quaffle tucked under his arm securely. We went through the same dance again. Both me and Michael tried to get him to pass, but he ignored both of us.

"A little ball-hoggery going on with the Hogwarts team," I heard Claire say, I could practically hear her frowning.

"Oi, captain, it's a _team_ sport. Just so you know," Lottie supplied.

James glanced over his shoulder at the Commenter's box and glared. He turned back around, but a second too late. Durand came down and flew right in front of James. James flinched and dodged him, but he loosened his grip on the quaffle. Richard came up and grabbed it from his hands. Groans erupted from the stands. Richard flew ahead, then threw the quaffle as hard as he could, the third chaser Bourque catching it and flying into the scoring zone. He dodged a bludger, faked to the left, then tossed the quaffle into the right hoop, Jack having been fooled.

"Beauxbatons score. Two-hundred-ninety to one-hundred-forty," Claire's voice dutifully announced.

I, however, was seething. WHAT THE HELL WAS JAMES DOING?

"POTTER!" I yelled. When he didn't look over, I flew over to where he was waiting for Jack to give him the quaffle. According to the rules, Jack could hold the quaffle for as long as necessary before passing to a chaser. I wheeled in front of him. "What the bloody hell was that?"

"Get back to your position," he growled at me.

"Not until you tell me why you suddenly decided to ignore both me and Michael. Me? Sure. I get it. You're pissed at me for something I didn't do. At least in your mind, you have justification for being an ass to me. But not to Michael. I don't care what you're mad at, but we've worked far too fucking hard to lose because _you_ ," I poked him hard in the chest, "suddenly decided to have a hissy fit."

We didn't notice that Madame Hooch had called a time out. Apparently, you _can_ take too long to pass.

"Excuse me, gentlemen, but if you don't mind, we have a game to finish."

I wheeled around, prepared to mutter some form of consent to Madame Hooch, but I jerked back when I saw Austen.

"Go back to your goals, this has nothing to do with you," James said, glared even harder at Austen than me. Small comfort.

"It's time out, I can go wherever I want," he replied obnoxiously. He flew down and landed where the two teams were on the field. Me and James joined them, he kept silent and didn't acknowledge my brilliant speech.

I mean really, isn't this the part in the story where he's supposed to realize his mistake, apologize, and we go on to win the game? Why the hell does this stuff not happen in real life?

Madame Hooch announced that the game would resume in fifteen minutes. We'd been playing for just about three hours. Dumbledore had hinted to her that the players might be a little tired, games never went this long. The average game was usually up to two hours.

"Team meeting, over at the bench," Sirius said, looking curiously at James.

"You know, I've known Jake since we were both in first year."

I stiffened when someone suddenly put their arm around my shoulder. I looked to my right and saw Austen's smiling face, but there was something in his eyes, something I did not like at all.

"This is a team meeting, Maynord, go back to your side," James said. Funny, he only seemed to talk when telling Austen to leave.

"No, you might want to hear this. See, at Beauxbaton's we've got the same deal going as you do in Hogwarts: in first year, everyone takes a flying class," he started. For some reason, a chill went down my back. This was not going to turn out well.

"Now, Jake, he _sucked_. He couldn't even get off the ground. I'm pretty sure he even skipped the class after the second day."

"I got better. Go away," I said, stepping away from him. The entire time stood in front of us, confused expressions on their faces.

"Oh, but you didn't. Oi! Bourque!" Austen called to his team mate. The very tall chaser came over. He towered above me and had a couple inches on Austen. "Bourque shared a dorm with Jake while he was still at Beauxbatons, you see," Austen explained to James and the other guys, who were all still silent. Even though there was a pleasant breeze keeping the air cool, I started to sweat.

"Hah! You mean when Jake was actually in the dorm. He was gone almost every night who-knows-where with his band or whatever, playing in different pubs and places," Bourque said, but like he was recalling a funny memory. I don't think he had any idea he was ruining my life.

"You're in a band? You never told us," Michael said, looking at me.

"I - I quit. Since I moved up here."

"Oh, but back to what I was talking about. Jake's known this girl, Lily, my girlfriend-"

" _Ex_ -girlfriend," I growled.

"-since they were kids. Lived next door and everything. Now _Lily_ was a total natural on a broom. The best flier I'd ever seen. She and her friends, Claire, Meredith, and Kate were on the girl's Quidditch Team at Beauxbaton's. They kept it running, recruited members, even convinced Headmistress to let them travel to Germany to play against their school's girl's team there."

"No offense and everything," Sirius said, rolling his eyes slightly, "but why the hell are you telling us about that?"

"Lily didn't come to school when it started. Her friends told everyone she was sick, but when we come up later I suddenly see her at your stupid carnival last month, totally fine," Austen said.

"She got better," James defended me.

"You don't recover from spattegroit in three weeks," Austen said. Slowly, the Beauxbatons team came over and joined us, wondering why their captain was talking to the other team.

The Hogwarts team shuffled nervously. They could tell something was off, but they hadn't figured it out yet. I was silent, staring at the ground. Why was this happening?

"Can you just get to whatever you came over here for? We need to get on with the game," James said, suddenly impatient.

"You really are thick, aren't you?" Austen taunted, smirking. "I know you've seen Lily before," his eyes moved towards me. James followed his gaze and looked at me too, confused. "It really is weird how much they look alike. It's more than just they both happen to have red hair. The freckles, the height. Now, in the beginning of the match, that was definitely Jake. He can't fly for shit. And think about it. In France, Jake took his guitar with him everywhere, even into classes. Never did homework, just played it or met with his friends," he continued. I know Austen and Jake talked, especially when I was dating him (Austen, I mean), but I didn't realize they actually _knew_ each other. "Lily was a whiz at Charms. She always did her homework..." I looked up, and saw a look of realization dawn on Remus's face. His mouth dropped open and looked directly at me.

My spirit dropped. Shit.

"Austen," I said, my voice it's normal tone. "Stop." I knew what he was doing. It was only a matter of time before anyone figured it out, but this was awful.

"Jake...?" Remus said uncertainly.

Fuck, my bottom lip was trembling. My eyes welled and I shook my head.

The team took half steps back in surprise.

"What the hell is going on here?" James demanded, but he was looking at me.

"I \- I..." I trailed off, hopeless. I looked around at the team's faces. They all looked confused, but with a trace of... betrayal. Had I betrayed them?

"Last summer, the girl's team at Beauxbatons was cut," I started. I slipped my wand out of my pocket. Taking a deep breath, I wove it over my face, but kept my head down. I could feel my eyelashes growing, me features softening. I could almost feel my eyes changing color. "Austen wouldn't let me and Claire join the boy's team. Jake was going on tour with his band for a month. So I cut my hair, did a couple of charms, and posed as him at Hogwarts." I tapped my head, my hair growing back to its normal length and I finally looked up.

The team flinched, a couple of them gasped. Sirius's eyes went as wide as saucers.

"Evans?" Sirius asked. Madame Hooch blew the whistle, signaling that the game would now resume, but none of us moved.

"Jake came back a couple days early. That's who was playing the first part of the game. But after James made him sit out, I talked to him and explained everything."

"If... if you're telling the truth, and you're Lily, then where's Jake?" James asked, his voice level.

"Present!" I heard behind me.

Jake strolled up pleasantly, totally not fitting the mood. "Jake Cole, nice to officially meet you." He reached out and shook James's hand.

James took his hand back, and looked between and Jake.

"James," I said pleadingly. Madame Hooch blew the whistle again and started walking towards us, wondering what the hold up was. "I wasn't trying to hurt you. I did this so I could play Quidditch. Everything that happened with Bridget was a huge misunderstanding."

"Teams! What is going on- Excuse me, miss?" Madame Hooch said dangerously, looking at me. "Only the Quidditch Teams are allowed on the field while game is in play."

I'd had enough. I was tired of this. I was tired of being Jake and Lily and Jaly and having to pretend to be a boy in order to be a freaking Quidditch Team. I turned and looked straight at her. "I _am_ part of the team."

Michael came up behind me and slung his arm around my shoulder. "Don't you recognize her, Madame? It's Jake Cole!"

"Yeah, Madame Hooch," Jack spoke up. He stood beside me too. "She's been one of the team since the beginning of the year."

"Best chaser I've ever met," Michael put in.

"A bloody firecracker," Sirius supplied, stepping up too.

"And smart to boot," Ryan said, even though I never really talked to him that much. It was still sweet.

"And she's playing in this game."

I turned around and looked at James, my heart swelling. The team surrounded me, almost protectively. I looked around at all of them. I almost cried from how happy I was. Finally, I managed a watery smile. "Yeah, professor, don't you recognize me?"

Madame Hooch looked at me warily. Finally, she shrugged and rolled her eyes. "Whatever. We just need to start the game again."

"Ref!" Austen spluttered in protest. He look scandalized.

"I'm all for co-ed Quidditch Teams," Hooch answered. "I tried out for the Appleby Arrows, but because I was a girl they turned me down. So, girl, go for it."

"But - but this is against the rules!" Austen said.

"Afraid you'll lose to a girl?" I challenged.

"If we don't start this game right this moment, both of your teams are disqualified," Madame Hooch threatened.

"Fine. Like you guys will even have a chance with a _girl_ on your team," Austen growled. I smiled sweetly and waved when the Beauxbaton's team went and lined up in the center of the field.

"Whenever you're ready," Hooch winked and walked after them.

I turned around to the team. "Thank you."

"You're part of the team," Sirius shrugged, but grinned. They all agreed. James didn't say anything.

"James?" I said softly, looking at him.

Finally he looked up and looked at me in the eye.

"Evans, I swear to Merlin, if you play any less than you do in practice, Darren goes in, because right now we're getting our asses handed to us," but he was smiling softly.

I grinned back. "No problem."

"Let's go Gryffindor!" Michael yelled. The team cheered, I joined in, and so did Jake, who now looked awkward among the Quidditch players. The team ran onto the field, but I gave Jake a hug.

"Good luck, Lils," he said. He pushed me towards the field. I smiled and put my hair into a ponytail, then joined the team in the middle of the field.

"Ah, finally, the last Hogwarts player - holy shit, is that Lily?"

Smooth, Lottie.

"I guess we just figured out what took the teams so long to get back out," Claire commented.

"Teams ready?" Madame Hooch called from the ground, all fourteen of us floating above. She blew her whistle, tossing the quaffle.

"Hogwarts in possession, captain Potter flying breaking away from the pack. Dodge a bludger. Passes to Evans - that was previously Cole, people, keep up. Evans pulls a nice trick, passes to Turner. Turner quickly passes back to Potter. Nice flying by Potter, watch out, Richard's coming at you - OH THAT WAS DEFINITELY A FOUL! Apparently not. Beauxbatons in possession, Richard passes to Bourque, narrowly dodges a bludger hit by Ryan Campbell, Bourque to Durand. Durand shoots - saved by Jack Simmons! Simmons to Evans, Evans going down field. Challenged by Richard, passes to Potter. Potter down the field. Passes to Turner. Turner to Evans, Evans shoots - SCORES PAST MAYNORD! Two-ninety to one-fifty!"

The crowd cheered, but if you looked closely they all had the same look of confusion on their faces. Aww, it's okay, crowd, you'll understand eventually.

I pumped my fist in the air in celebration of the goal, but suddenly felt something solid hit my elbow. And hear a whistle blow.

I glanced behind me and saw Richard holding his eye, glaring at me.

" _That_ was a foul? Are you fu-"

"Cobbing! Excessive use of elbows, it looks like Hooch is giving Beauxbatons a penalty shot for Evans's... over enthusiasm."

Oops.

A great swell of boo's came from the crowd, but Hooch shrugged. "I let her play, I have to at least follow the foul rules," she told James. He nodded in understanding. He shrugged, defeated, to Sirius, but we all flew to the edge of the pitch while Richard took his penalty shot. High, high above, Bill and the Beauxbatons seeker were coming closer to us. From here I heard Bill shouting, probably cheering Jack on.

Richard flew towards the goal. Jack waited for his move, staying in the middle of the center ring.

Richard threw the quaffle towards the left hoop...

"WAIT!"

...and it sailed right through hoop, between Jack's hands.

"I'VE GOT THE SNITCH!"

What?

"Bill caught the snitch!"

"CLARKE OF HOGWARTS CAUGHT THE SNITCH!"

"Did we just win?"

"WE WON!"

The stands erupted in cheers, the Hogwarts students jumping up in their seats.

Madame Hooch blew the whistle. We all gathered around her, the two seekers panting in front of her.

"I caught the snitch before Richard threw the quaffle!"

"No he didn't!" The other protested, "He caught it right after he threw it! Our goal counts!"

Madame Hooch looked perplexed. She turned to us. "Did any of you witness Clarke catching the snitch?"

She took our silence as a negative response.

"I'm afraid I'll have to call a tie."

"IT'S A FUCKING TIE?"

Always the one with words, that Lottie.

"BUT BILL CAUGHT THE FUCKING SNITCH FIRST!" I shouted.

Well... we _are_ best friends.

"For the first time in what I think is the history of this game, the referee has called a tie," Claire announced while Lottie still protested in the background.

"How do we decide the winner?" James asked (well, shouted).

Madame Hooch hesitated, then took out her wand and used it to amplify her voice.

"Each team will select a player to take a penalty shot to decide the outcome."

We all flew dejectedly down to the ground. James started pacing and talking to Sirius.

"Okay," James said, his hands in fists. "Okay. A tie. A goddamn, motherf-" Sirius cleared his throat. "-tie. We need someone to take the shot..."

"Oh, go on James," Michael said. "You're captain, you're the best flier, you have to take the shot."

James looked at him, but then looked at me.

"No," he said. "Lily is going to take it."

My head spun.

"W-what?" I spluttered out. "I can't take it!"

"Yes you can," he said. "You're unreliable, unexpected, and crazy. They won't expect whatever you plan on throwing at them."

"I don't plan on throwing them anything!" I said, my voice raising an octave. But, oh merlin, he got the team on his side! They were all thumping me on the back and giving me encouraging words.

"C'mon, Evans, you got this!"

"You're gonna win this game!"

"You deserve it!"

"You two just don't want the pressure on you!" I accused Michael and James.

Michael grinned guiltily. "I definitely don't envy you. But we really do believe in you, Ja- er, Lily."

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Beauxbatons is ready to take their shot," I heard Claire announce. We all looked at the field, and saw Bourque flying to the center of the field.

"You got to get up there, Jack," James said. "Good luck."

Jack nodded grimly and flew up to the goal posts. We all watched, the stands fell silent.

Bourque was handed the quaffle and Madame Hooch blew the whistle. Bourque sped forward. He flew towards the right, but threw the quaffle towards the left at the last moment. Jack caught the trick just in time, reaching towards the quaffle, stretching out, and catching the leather ball by the very tips of his fingers. Immediate cheers. The Hogwarts students were turning red (and not because all of the red clothes they were wearing) by how loud they were screaming.

"Beauxbatons misses there shot! If Hogwarts can make this, the match goes to them."

No pressure.

Jack joined as again to many high fives and cheers.

I stood there, shivering, as Austen flew up to the goal posts.

"Come on, Lily, you can do it," I heard James say. I looked up, he was right next to me. "You can do it."

I stared at him for about ten seconds, then nodded. I mounted my broom and flew up to Madame Hooch.

"And Hogwarts has selected Lily Evans for their penalty shot. Excellent move, if you want my opinion," Lottie said.

"Good luck," Madame Hooch said, the whistle already in her mouth. She flew back a few feet then blew it, the high pitched screech piercing the air.

Everything was silent. The crowd held their breath, all eyes on me. I hesitated for a second that felt like a year, then flew towards the goal posts.

Time slowed down. I felt like I was flying through molasses, but also like everything was going a mile a minute. My eyes were on Austen. He was smirking, so confident in the thought that he was going to block my shot.

It's funny. I had almost completely forgotten that he was even here. He used to be so important. First as my boyfriend, then as the guy I was so hellbent on proving wrong. But then it turned into me trying to prove something for myself. Looking at him now, so arrogant, I can't help but really hate myself for ever falling for a guy like him.

It _really_ made me want to beat him.

I flew towards him.

I threw the quaffle.

Austen shot to the right.

And the quaffle went through his arms.

Right through the hoop.

A whistle blew.

Shouts were shouted.

Tears were shed.

Emotion was let loose in a deafening roar of approval from all around the stands.

"HOGWARTS WINS!"

"WE WON!"

"GO LILY!"

"GO GO GRYFFINDOR! GO GO GRYFFINDOR!"

"I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!"

"HELL YEAH!"

But the best was when Jake ran onto the field, fists raised, shouting, "LILY FUCKING KICKED YOUR ASS, MAYNORD!"

In a daze, I landed, and was immediately swept up into the air by the team. I looked down and realized James and Sirius had hoisted me onto their shoulders, shouting their heads off.

"It's not fair!" I heard Austen yelling. "I _let_ you make that shot, Lily! I hate you! I never want to see you again!"

But I didn't care at all, I was too busy shouting and cheering and freaking out.

The field was suddenly filled with every student at Hogwarts, all running around and cheering and screaming.

Dumbledore came down the field, holding the Cup aloft, and handed it to James. The crowd lifted the entire team up to join me and he held it with one hand, pumping his fist with the other.

I saw Kate and Meredith amongst the crowd. Lottie and Claire came running from the stands, and Lottie ran straight to Sirius, wrapping her arms around him and giving him a tight hug. Sirius lifted her and spun around in a circle.

I looked over to James, tears actually brimming in my eyes: WE. FUCKING. WON. He caught my gaze and he stopped shouting. He smiled softly, almost sadly, and high fived me. But then he looked away and continued to celebrate with the rest of the team.

Oh.

Well.

All right then.


	18. The End

** Chapter 18: The End **

There are some moments in your life when you look back on some of the things you did and think to yourself: "Huh. Maybe I shouldn't have done that."

This was one of those moments.

"Miss Evans," Professor Dumbledore said, "had you actually been a student here at Hogwarts, your action would certainly have gotten you expelled. You impersonated a student, technically broke into our school, forged paperwork, and broke exactly sixty-seven school rules."

I slowly sank lower in my seat. Dumbledore said it all as though we were discussing the weather. He summoned me into his office not fifteen minutes after we officially won the match.

"Not to mention," he continued, "the repercussions you'll receive at Beauxbatons."

I was so dead.

"However," he said, and I swear he smiled. I swear on my life. "A few weeks into term, I received an owl from your Headmistress."

Shit shit shit shit.

"We simply exchanged pleasantries, I gave her a list of the students who came to our school, to make sure none were left behind or more came. And I made quite a clever joke on how we were lucky to have Jake Cole on the team, he seemed to be an excellent addition. Your Headmistress seemed confused, though. She never recalled Jake Cole being on his Quidditch Team at Beauxbatons. But then she guessed he may have just decided to try out when he moved, as a way of getting to know people. Then she mentioned one girl would be missing from the Quidditch Club, the captain, Lily Evans."

Wait. Had Dumbledore known all this time?

"Yes," he said, which was fucking creepy. The old man read my mind. "It didn't take me very long to figure it out, especially when the mail at Hogwarts is being screened before coming in and out."

My eyes widened. "Isn't that a violation of privacy?"

Dumbledore suddenly looked years older, and he regarded me sadly. "I'm afraid to say I'd rather have the students be safe. You see, there are dark forces out in the world. Besides, we only use a charm to detect lies, deception, and, to put it simply, dark magic. I suppose what you were doing would could possibly affect so many negatively, it picked up your letters to Misses O'Connor, Girard, Richards, and Laurent."

I opened my mouth and closed it like a fish. "Am... am I going to jail?"

Dumbledore smiled softly. "No, of course not. But I am wondering if you are aware of the fact that the Department of Magical Games and Sports was planning to converge over Christmas Holiday and discuss the idea of co-ed Quidditch Teams in the official League. If the motion passed, Hogwarts, Beauxbatons, and every other magical school would most likely create co-ed teams as well."

"What!" I shrieked. "Are - are you _kidding_? I missed the deadline by a couple of _months_?"

"Well, no," Dumbledore smiled wider. "You see, when I figured out you were _not_ in fact Jake Cole and were instead Lily Evans. I may have convinced the Department to move their meeting up by a couple of months. They met yesterday."

"They did? What did they say?"

"I may have included some information about your story."

Get on with it!

"They decided that you, playing in this game today, would be the test run. And I would be the judge on whether or not it works."

My heart stopped. I swear to Merlin, it didn't beat.

"And I'm proud to tell you that I've decided that I think it's a marvelous idea."

"AHH!"

I jumped out of my seat and shot forward, leaning over Dumbledore's desk in order to hug him tightly.

"Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you!"

He chuckled. "I do have one last thing to say, though."

Crap, I was still in trouble.

"While studying here, you've shown wonderful talent and intelligence. You seem to enjoy it here. I would like to formally extend an invitation for you to join Hogwarts, and become an official student."

"Oh," I said softly. "Stay here for the rest of my seventh year? I would have to leave all of my friends at Beauxbatons."

"Yes," he said, "I realize it is a large decision."

I hesitated. "Can I get back to you on this? Have some time to think?"

Dumbledore nodded. "Take your time. But now I think your team would like to celebrate with you."

* * *

"Lily!" I heard Lottie squeal when I got back down to the ground floor. She and the girls ran at me and enveloped me in a hug.

"Congratulations!"

"We're so proud of you!"

"I totally knew you could do it!"

"How'd James take the news?"

I looked at Claire, who asked the question. "I don't know, I haven't seen him since the game."

"Everyone's getting ready for the dance. It was kind of unofficially moved up to tonight instead of tomorrow," she said. "I don't think you'll be welcomed back to the Boy's Dormitory, though."

I smiled weakly. "Yeah, they might not appreciate that anymore."

"Come on, let's go get ready in our room. Smile! This is going to be fun!"

We went into their room, but were met with a surprise: an extra bed, and all of my stuff next to it.

"Wow. Hogwarts doesn't waste any time," Lottie commented.

"Oh well," I said, shrugging.

We had a couple of hours to spare, so we hung out in the room. Kate and Meredith told me how confused the entire school was when I suddenly joined the game after the break as Lily. And how they felt weird yelling "GO LILY!" when everyone else was wondering who the girl was. Finally, about an hour and a half before the ball was supposed to start, Kate got to us start getting ready.

"Hurry up, guys, I want to get in there!" Kate said, immediately launching to her bed and pulling out her bag. We all took showers and magicked our hair dry. Which was a strange feeling for me. First off, I had forgotten how long it took for me to wash my hair. Then, after Lottie had dried it for me, I forgot what I was supposed to do with it. It was naturally wavy, and reached the very small of my back. I looked in the mirror and shrugged, figuring it looked fine like that.

I went back into the room to put my dress on when I realized one tiny problem: I didn't have a dress.

"Uh.. guys?" I said. Kate and Claire turned around, Lottie and Meredith were in the bathroom. "I don't have a dress."

"Yes you do," Claire said happily. She went to her trunk and pulled out a parcel and gave it to me. I looked at it dumbly then opened the paper and shook out an emerald-green dress with thin straps, a white sash around the middle, and a skirt that would hit right above my knees. I knew would fan out like a tutu if I spun in a circle (which I loved doing).

"Oh wow," I said, lifting it up to my body and looking in the mirror. It matched my eyes, of course. Claire knew I loved green. "Thank you!"

"It was no problem," Kate grinned. "We... had a feeling you might need to be a girl at the dance."

"But no more genderbending, yeah?" Claire said, poking my shoulder.

"I am officially Lily Evans for the rest of my life," I promised solemnly.

"Good! I missed her!" I heard Lottie call from the bathroom. We all laughed and I hugged Claire and Kate.

"Get dressed, you're falling behind!" Kate said. She and Claire were already in their dresses, and Lottie and Meredith were already doing their makeup and hair.

"Merlin! So impatient!" I said exasperatedly. I slipped into my dress, it fit perfectly. I twirled in a circle and the skirt sure enough fanned out. Claire laughed and shook her head.

"What are you doing your hair like?" she asked, playing with her own in the mirror.

"Just keep it like this?" I said, playing with the ends. Claire looked over and raised her eyebrows.

"Oh Merlin, you were a guy for too long," she smiled. "Lottie! We need a hairstyle for Lilykins!"

"Hmm?" Lottie asked, walking out of the bathroom. Her hair was curled and clipped back on either side. With that and the light blue halter dress, she looked really pretty.

"Lily. Hair. Fix," Claire commanded, taking advantage of the empty space in the bathroom.

Lottie looked at me, then commanded I sit down and started doing something to my hair.

Holy shit, it _hurt_!

"What are you doing, pulling it out?" I asked through grit teeth.

"Of course not," Lottie said. She had her wand in her teeth, and stabbing my head with bobby pins. Finally, she used her wand to do something, smooth some hairs out or make sure it stayed up or something, whatever, but she was done.

I scowled at her, but she rolled her eyes.

"Ooh, I like that," Claire said when she saw me coming into the bathroom through the mirror.

Aww, crap, it actually did look good. Lottie had taken half of my hair and put it up in a series of twists and braids at the back of my head, and left the other half down, curled it, and draped it over one shoulder.

Makeup turned out to be just as difficult. I stared at my eyeshadow for a couple of seconds before remembering what it was for. And then the dilemma of which color to use. Was I summer or a winter? Was there such thing as being a fall or spring? Why couldn't I remember this? I had turned into a freaking boy! I ended up going for a pinkish-brown eyeshadow and dark eyeliner. After poking myself in the eye several times with the mascara thing, I put on some blush and was done. I joined the girls in our room, and they didn't comment on my makeup so I guess it looked all right. It kinda felt good to wear it, like when it's finally warm out and you put on your favorite tank top.

"Cinderella's ready for the ball!" Lottie sang. She let me barrow a pair of heels (no, not the stripper heels) and we left the room and made our way to the Great Hall, where the ball was being held. It had already started by the time we got there. Right off the bat I saw the Beauxbaton's team dancing. Well, all of them except for Austen. He was mysteriously absent. Claire ran off to go dance with one of the beaters from Beauxbatons, Lottie went to go find Sirius, Meredith starting talking to a Ravenclaw named Dorcas Meadows, whom she'd met during Transfiguration, and Kate was approached by Michael, and she smiled when he asked her to dance and followed him into the crowd.

All too soon, I was left alone. I stood there, on the edge of the dancing, my feet already hurting from the shoes. I glanced around the room a bit. All four of the girls were dancing. Peter was too, with Ulyssa of all people. I didn't even know he fancied her! Maybe that's what he was trying to talk to me about a couple of weeks ago. A couple more seconds and I saw Remus dancing with Bridget's friend, Zoe, who looked bloody gorgeous in a deep blue dress that brought out her eyes. I smiled, realizing I'd figured out his mystery date. But then I felt a tap on my back, and turned around to see Bridget.

"Hi, Lily," Bridget said.

I smiled awkwardly. "Hey. Listen, I'm really sorry. About... everything."

Bridget shrugged but smiled. "It's all right. It was my fault, too. I'm the type of person who gets a crush on a girl impersonating a guy. 'Just that type of person, you know?"

I laughed. "I want you to officially meet someone." I grabbed her wrist and lead her into the crowd, not really sure where I was going. But I eventually found him laughing with Frank Longbottom.

"Jake!" I called, and waved him over. He said goodbye to Frank and come over to us.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Jake Cole, I'd like you to officially meet Bridget Perrotta," I said, and stepped back. "Bridget, this is Jake. The real one."

Bridget smiled softly. "Hello."

"Hey," he returned. "Wanna dance and tell me how you knew my song?"

Bridget laughed, "Sure."

Aww, young love.

On that note, I looked around the room and happened to find James. He was sitting at a table with Remus, Peter, and Jack, laughing at something Remus had just said. He must've felt someone looking at him or something, but he looked up, right at me. His smile faded slightly, but held my gaze for a couple of moments, then went back to his conversation with the boys.

I bit the inside of my cheek. On my way out of the room, all I could think to myself was Dumbledore saying _"What you were doing would could possibly affect so many negatively."_ Did I hurt James? He didn't seem so upset. We won the game. He finally sorted out his feelings for Bridget.

Then why the hell whenever he saw me he always looked so unhappy?

He gave me the game-winning shot.

He won't talk to me.

He doesn't seem like he hates me.

He doesn't seem like he likes me either.

Would he be happy if I went back to Beauxbatons?

Would he be happier if I stayed?

Would he even care?

Oh Merlin, I sound like some emotional poet.

I need to get out of this castle.

I found myself walking down the hill to the Lake. Halfway down I got impatient and took off my shoes, flexing my toes to make sure they still worked.

I went to the edge of the lake, where the edge dropped off into the water. The sun was setting and I sat down in a nice patch of grass, facing the sunset, and brought my knees to my chin.

I watched the sun set for a few minutes until I felt someone sit next to me, so close our sides were almost touching. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw James.

"James!" I yelled.

"Hey," he said simply, not looking at me yet. He had his eyes trained on the sunset.

I waited a couple of seconds but he still didn't talk.

"What are you doing here?" I finally asked.

He took a moment to answer, but finally turned his head and looked at me and said, "I'm sorry."

"What?"

"I'm sorry. For everything that happened. I was such an asshole, and it wasn't even your fault."

"I thought I was the one who was supposed to be apologizing."

"What for?"

"I lied to you for weeks! I convinced you I was a boy, lived in your room, infiltrated your Quidditch Team, ruined your chances with Bridget, and... everything!"

"You pretended to be a boy for Quidditch, which I totally understand. And Bridget... I'm over her. It was just a crush I couldn't get rid of. You actually kind of helped me."

"Wait.. you're not mad at me?"

"No. I thought _you_ were mad at _me_."

"Not at all."

"Oh."

We sat for a couple of minutes before James spoke up again.

"Got a date to this ball?"

"Nope. You?"

"Well, there's this girl..."

"Oh? Do tell."

"Well, I met her at this carnival. Sirius - my mate, Sirius, you know him, right? - decided we should have this kissing booth. I originally went to go kiss this girl I'd been chasing for a while, but Lily shows up on the bench instead. At first I was kind of bummed, but I paid for my ticket and everything, so I decided to just kiss her and get it over with."

"And?"

"Best snog of my life. Absolutely brilliant. Like fireworks, only not as cheesy."

"She sounds like quite a girl."

"Oh, she is. Prettiest girl I've ever seen. She's funny, smart, a little crazy, but it works for her. You know she pretended to be a boy just to play Quidditch?"

"You don't say."

"Oh yeah. She's amazing. I've been thinking about Lily a lot since that day."

"Ha-ha, we made a rhyme."

"Wow, I didn't plan that ahead of time."

"Okay, James, you can stop it now."

"But I like it when you're mad, you crinkle your brow."

"Oh, now that was just horrible, who uses 'brow' anymore?"

"My friend, Remus, but we make him sleep on the floor."

"That didn't make sense."

"Would you like to dance?"

I laughed. "That's not even a proper rhyme."

"So?" he smiled and stood up, then extended his hand. I took it and he pulled me up then twirled me around. He hummed some muggle song, and I rested my head on his chest and we rotated in a small circle.

"Dumbledore offered to let me stay at Hogwarts for the rest of the year," I told him, wrapping my arms around his neck. He put his hands on my waist. "Or I could go back to Beauxbatons with the girls."

"Have you decided what you're going to do yet?" he asked softly.

I stopped our little dance and looked up, then stood on my toes and kissed him on the lips. My eyes fluttered closed and we stood there for about a minute. Finally, I broke away and looked at him and smiled. "I think so."

* * *

_Dear Jake,_

_So I've decided that transferring out of Beauxbatons and into Hogwarts was the best decision of my life, and it's only Halloween! I miss the girls, but I write them all the time and every couple of weeks they'll come up or I'll go down to France for a visit. Even though you only stayed for two weeks, I think you understand. But seriously - two weeks! I know you got 'discovered' and everything (congratulations on that, by the way. There's already a 'Free Fall' fan cluc here at Hogwarts) but that's still not cool at all. I was actually looking forward to - oh, I don't know - going to class with you. But I hope you're having an amazing time touring all over America. Just don't let rock stardom go to your head, yeah? _

_Life at Hogwarts is pretty normal. What's weird is staying in the girl's dorm. I kinda miss it with the Marauders. But it's lovely having a room that has made beds and everything! Bridget, Zoe, Harley, and Bailey are awesome room mates. Bridget kinda reminds me of Lottie now that I'm actually getting to know her.  
_

_James and I are still dating. Oh shut up, I can practically see you rolling your eyes, but admit it - you want to hear about this! As soon as you saw my letter you thought "Oh, sweet Merlin, I can't wait to hear about James!" You know what? Even your annoyance (that I've admittedly made up in my head, I have no idea how you're reacting) can't kill my mood right now. I'm just so happy with him, it's just... happy sigh. Everything is wonderful and perfect and amazing. And we're total shoe-ins to win the Quidditch Cup at the end of the year, we already killed Ravenclaw in our match against them yesterday._

_Lottie told me to tell you that she says 'hi'. I don't know why she doesn't just write you herself, when she can write to Sirius every day! I'm not even lying. EVERY. DAY. He'd receive her letter during breakfast, totally ignore the rest of us and read through the entire three feet roll of parchment (I'm kidding, it's not that long), and then steal moments away from classes to write an equally long reply. He'd send it right before dinner, that poor owl they're using goes back to France, and then the whole thing starts again. And she's coming up almost every weekend to see him at Hogsmeade. _

_She tells me things are more or less the same at Beauxbatons. But they followed Hogwarts's lead and allowed girls on the Quidditch Team now. Get this - CLAIRE WAS MADE CAPTAIN! AAHHHH! It was a total team mutiny against Austen. Kate, Meredith, and the other three boys just announced it during one of their practices. I'm told it was absolutely amazing, and Claire is currently leading the team to great heights. Austen is still on the team though. Damn his talent._

_I'll tell Bridget you say hello, even though I'm sure she probably has gotten your letter by now. Honestly, you two write just as much as Lottie and Sirius. And I barely get a letter a week, from two of my best friends! I feel the love, Jake, I really do.  
_

_Send me some American candy to make up for it. I've become rather fond of Snickers.  
_

_xoxo-  
_

_Lily_

_P.S: James says hello. (;_

* * *


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